Apparently, there is someone more qualified to answer your filthy questions than Dan Savage. The identity of Dan's replacement may shock you…
A man's buddy is accused of sexual assault by an acquaintance. The caller is dubious, but pretends to believe her. Should he confront her or lie in order to protect his friend?
Is there a polite way to suggest that a lady shave her nether-regions?

Remember: Think of the children.
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Also, would it kill you to Facebook-like Dan Savage? No it would not.