The Stranger

Do not miss the penultimate night of The Program, the five-night showcase of Northwest hiphop. For one, it features Dyme Def, the only band that can challenge Blue Scholars, the reigning champions of the Seattle scene. Like the Scholars, Dyme Def has a sound you just can't miss, a big and hungry beat. As for Jake One, he is unstoppable. He has produced music for 50 Cent, Freeway, De La Soul, and every important local act. As for J.Pinder, he got next. (Neumo's, 925 E Pike St, 709-9467. 8 pm, $15 adv/$50 for all shows, all ages. Through Dec 22. See www.thestranger.com/theprogram for details.) by Charles Mudede

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Kay Kay and His Weathered Underground is an indie-rock orchestra with big-top pizzazz, a freewheeling vaudevillian jamboree, with bandleader Kirk Huffman as our cool-kid ringmaster. The 11-piece ensemble's muted trumpets and pizzicato strings maximize the good-time swing and big-band drama. Opening pop band Aqueduct has the most fun onstage, and their rosy-cheeked enthusiasm is contagious. (Chop Suey, 1325 E Madison St, 324-8000. 8 pm, $10, 21+.) by Jonathan Zwickel

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A sweet and surprisingly clean comedy about the pitfalls of teen pregnancy, Juno is so smart and cleverly written that it risks being too cute for its own good. Thankfully, the performances—especially from the startling Ellen Page and the always welcome Michael Cera—rescue the movie from its own self-conscious trappings. The result is perhaps the best comedy of the year: cynical yet heartfelt, funny yet kinked by a hint of sadness. (See movie times at www.thestranger.com for details.) by Bradley Steinbacher

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Everybody knows Christmas Eve is better than Christmas, and if you follow these instructions, this will be the best Christmas Eve ever. Get The Roger Whittaker Christmas Album from 1978—the one with the cover showing a bunch of fake snow on Whittaker's comb-over. Go to Westlake Center. Get on the merry-go-round and press play on the song "Darcy the Dragon." You will get the Christ. (Westlake Center, 400 Pine St. 10 am–6 pm, $2 suggested donation.) by Jen Graves

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I have seen the Rapture—or, at least its annual Christmas Day approximation, when everyone's at home opening presents and it's just us Jews (and Hindus, Muslims, Buddhists, chronic inebriates, and assorted sinners and apostates) out on the streets. If the Rapture really comes, and all the world's righteous Christians are whisked away to heaven, this is probably what it will feel like—peaceful, empty, and nobody left to defend intelligent design. It's really quite nice. (Free, all morning long.) by Eli Sanders

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Julian Schnabel's first film since Before Night Falls is a gorgeous, canny, and sensual adaptation of a most unlikely story: the memoir of Parisian fashion magazine editor Jean-Dominique Bauby after he was paralyzed by a sudden stroke. The camera becomes the one eye Bauby can still control, and it roves—back to memories of a night under the glow of a light-up Virgin Mary in Lourdes and over the wind-ruffled curtains in his modest hospital room. (See movie times at www.thestranger.com for details.) by Annie Wagner

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