Oh, I remember this. This is a letter for which I'd love to see a follow-up.

Geeze, buy new ones.

@2 I agree, but the costs can add up. A basic silicon toy starts at $80 - $100. It takes time and money to build up a collection. The alternative is probably-toxic cheap toys. So the issue of dividing toys should probably be done on an economic level -- try to estimate how much it all cost, and divvy it up on cost as much as possible. Maybe take turns picking toys until a dollar amount is reached.

I guess they'd get dusty if they were washed and then not used, but if they were frequently used and washed, or infrequently used and then not washed, I don't think they'd get dusty.

LW's word choice is telling here, though I could be reading a little bit too much into it: "I left the sex toys I knew were hers and took the rest".

LW specifically only left the ones she knew -for sure- were her ex's, and (obviously) took the ones she knew -for sure- were her own, but also took all of the toys that fell in the middle category (in her head) of "maybe they're mine, maybe they're hers, maybe they were co-purchases".

With absconding with that entire middle category, it's no surprise that the LW's ex feels that some of the sex toys taken were hers - and that is giving LW the benefit of the doubt in her accuracy assigning those 3 categories.

Personally, I think we need King Solomon to come around threatening to cut the dildo in two.

Return the ones she asked for, clean, with a note - "Took them for one last ride; now they're all yours. Cheers!"

"I think we need King Solomon to come around threatening to cut the dildo in two."

Classic.

I think the breaker should graciously allow the breakee the benefit of the doubt. I wouldn't've had the Ben Wa balls to demand sex toys from the gal I just dumped. The dumper usually has someone in the wings, so the dumpee is gonna need them toys.

@5 You the winner. Nuff said.

This truly one of the most cluelessly self-centered and pointless letters I've ever read here, and that's saying a lot.