Blogs Aug 25, 2014 at 1:04 pm

Grapefruiting? Is There Anything Straight People Won't Do?

Dan Savage
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Comments

1
Christ's sake people: put lube on your hand. This isn't actually difficult.
Doctor Memory on August 25, 2014 at 1:50 PM Report this
2
I wouldn't do that, especially if it's that loud.
Matt from Denver on August 25, 2014 at 1:58 PM Report this
3
Ayee, one little nick or abrasion on yer shaft and that's going to turn into a whole 'nuther experience!
COMTE on August 25, 2014 at 2:02 PM Report this
4
Nope. Just NOPE!
tdalec on August 25, 2014 at 2:03 PM Report this
5
That noise she makes when simulating a blowjob @2:49 is hilarious. I've never heard a louder blowjob...and I've, uh, heard quite a few.

The microphone is clipped on her blouse, directly next to where she's simulating the BJ so it's extra loud, truly funny and slightly scary.
IndicaDogwalk on August 25, 2014 at 2:06 PM Report this
6
For extra latin flair, use a poblano chilli.
ChefJoe on August 25, 2014 at 2:18 PM Report this
7
what the actual fuck?
jasha1 on August 25, 2014 at 2:19 PM Report this
8
Jesus, if the bj sounds like a garbage disposal, I'm more likely to shit myself than to cum.
biffp on August 25, 2014 at 2:22 PM Report this
9
Then, the next morning, you innocently serve him chunked grapefruit as part of his breakfast.
DAVIDinKENAI on August 25, 2014 at 2:28 PM Report this
10
That response video was one of the most adorable things I've seen. I would love to be those people's friend, they seem like really cool people.
Sathya on August 25, 2014 at 2:31 PM Report this
11
A room temperature grapefruit? Is she kidding? That grapefruit needs to spend an hour inside her front hole right before it's used.
seatackled on August 25, 2014 at 3:12 PM Report this
12
@ 10, just what I was thinking. That was definitely the most fun I've had so far today.
agony on August 25, 2014 at 3:28 PM Report this
13
@5 / @8 Yeah... that is not the sound I want to hear when I'm blindfolded and things are going on with my man parts. I'd involuntarily flinch myself out of whatever the heck was going on. :\
zachd on August 25, 2014 at 4:05 PM Report this
14
GARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAHGARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAHGARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAHGARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAHGARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAHGARGRAWARWOWRAGRAOWRAWRAH
Fnarf on August 25, 2014 at 4:17 PM Report this
15
@5 I think her necklace is brushing the mike. It is weird that they didn't edit that out though... Definitely hilarious though.
Jude Fawley on August 25, 2014 at 4:52 PM Report this
16
Crab ceviche
Headlikeahole on August 25, 2014 at 5:01 PM Report this
17
I thought it might be the mic to, but no. The garbage disposal sound is part of her (very complicated) technique, which you can learn here: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/vi…

This video involves an amazing amount of saliva and made me so nauseous that I had to turn it off. But hey, whatever tickles your pickle. And if you do everything she says, your man is guaranteed to come in 5 mins or less.
dinosox on August 25, 2014 at 5:41 PM Report this
18
Dear god, that is a sound I never want to hear in my bedroom.
JJinAus on August 25, 2014 at 5:58 PM Report this
19
"And remember, grapefruit is also a fat burner, so you're actually losing weight while you're sucking his dick."

I mean, could there be any more win in one video?
nocutename on August 25, 2014 at 7:35 PM Report this
20
Yey verily, at long last, the internet's divine purpose hath been revealed.
NotSean on August 25, 2014 at 9:26 PM Report this
21
um what
venomlash on August 25, 2014 at 10:21 PM Report this
22
Lily Du & David Craig won teh internets. Antie Angel is right up there with the cosmo articles suggesting collecting rocks to shove up your guys ass as a nice surprise.
restlessnative on August 25, 2014 at 11:15 PM Report this
23
It sounds like someone's being attacked by a wolverine.
Foggen on August 26, 2014 at 5:22 AM Report this
24
Thanks, Dan. You made my morning. My wife laughed so hard, she's crying.
Chaucer59 on August 26, 2014 at 6:49 AM Report this
25
Thanks, dinosox @17. Very informative. I guess the sounds are a way of not throwing up while getting the cock in deep enough to gag and make all that saliva?

Her technique looks powerful and efficient, but if that’s what it takes then I’ll just keep saying hello with my happy kisses then letting him come some other how.
Alison Cummins on August 26, 2014 at 8:49 AM Report this
26
SHE HAS SOMETHING CALLED THE "DEATH TECHNIQUE"

IF I HAD A DICK I WOULD BE TERRIFIED

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQmUcO2S…
icouldliveinhope on August 27, 2014 at 1:35 AM Report this
27
No melons? Leave a melon in warm sunshine for hours. Make a penis size hole and fuck away. No need for creepy lady and her cock blocker noises. Ahhhh, fond farm memories of childhood on a melon farm.
kwodell on August 27, 2014 at 4:21 PM Report this

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