A bit of back story: I'm in my 20s, a female lesbian, who recently was asked by a stranger I met on a dating site to use his consenting slave financially—and he invited me to use his slave's apartment as part of their slavery agreement. I've never done anything like this before, but I am planning on using him/his space for organizing a small non-profit that I run because it's awesome when kinks can help end social inequality, right? But how much investigation should I do into the nature of their relationship and whether the slave thing is fully consensual? Are there certain questions I should ask? It's a no-sex agreement also! Hope you reply, really wondering about this!

Seems Like Another Viable Engagement

SLAVE's email asking for my advice came in more than a year ago. I wasn't able to respond to her letter at the time—I can't respond to every letter—and I had forgotten about her question until stumbling over it in my "Might Wanna Respond" file. After rereading SLAVE's letter I was curious about what she ultimately decided to do. So I wrote and asked.

Hey, SLAVE! I just ran across your letter while looking for another one. I'm sorry I didn't respond at the time. Curious how it went, though, and would love an update if you care to share.—Dan

Hey! Thanks for getting back to me! I ended up insisting that we all sit down together for a "not in character" conversation to make sure it would be okay, which they reluctantly agreed to. I then became Slave Master and I had an awesome downtown apartment I could use whenever I wanted. It was a little strange convincing my friends to treat this guy like shit while we ran our charity meetings out of his place, so sometimes I would just lock him up in his cage when people were coming over, but a few of my friends really got into it. We had some great parties at his place! We've since parted ways, as I moved to another city, but I would totally do it again. Nothing like a sweet place to use and a guy to push around a bit. Thanks for keeping up with this sex advice stuff!—SLAVE

Meeting up with the top who reached out to you and the guy whose apartment you were going to be using—his consensual slave—for an out-of-roles/we're-all-equals conversation would've been my suggestion, SLAVE, so you clearly didn't need my advice. I'm glad it worked out—and, hey, here's hoping you find a slave with an awesome apartment and convenient cage in the city where you live now.