I'm wondering if this is the right place to ask a question for the show or if I MUST call? Either way, I'm just wondering: I identify as a queer female, having dated men and women almost in equal measure. Lately I'm finding that my fantasies are changing gears: I'm fantasizing about gay men, watching gay porn, feeling particularly sexual toward my gay male friends. I want to have intercourse with gay men. Is this insane and impossible? Might it be offensive to gay men that I'm actively trying to figure out how to satisfy my needs in this way? Is it unlikely that any gay men would be willing to get naked with a girl (and like it?)? I suppose one solution is to seek out a bisexual man, but is there anything else you'd recommend? What is the most ethical way to operate here?

Girl's Awkward Yearnings Mostly A Disaster

My response... after the jump.

I recently responded to a question from a gay man who was obsessed—suddenly, and much to his surprise/consternation—with the idea of having PIV sex with a woman in the context of a M/M/F threesome. Despite spending fifteen minutes searching through recent columns and SLLOTDs, GAYMAD, I wasn't able to locate (and link) the dude's letter and my response. (Did I dream it?) But rest assured: there's at least one gay dude out there curious about sleeping with a woman. (Unless I dreamt it.)

But there are probably a hell of a lot more bi guys out there rounding themselves up to gay—or rounding themselves down to gay—than there are gay guys out there who are interested in fucking a woman. If a gay-identified bi guy would do the trick, GAYMAD, you might have better luck (and receive swifter service) if you advertise for one of those.

If a gay-identified bi guy simply won't do—if only a gay-identified gay guy will do—then advertise for one of those gay guys. But brace yourself for a long wait.