How am I doing with headlines today? But seriously, can we talk about those gender-non-conforming mermaids Jen Graves writes about over here? Can we talk about the Whitney Museum of American Art's alleged censorship of the gender-non-conforming mermaids, and their alleged reason for the censorship, according to the artist?

In case you're just joining us, here's the painting:

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This is called Two Sides of Self and the painter is Ann Leda Shapiro. Courtesy of the Artist and Seattle Art Museum

As Graves reports, the Whitney accepted the piece and then right before the show went up the artist was "confoundingly informed" that there was an issue with the penises. As the artist describes the Whitney's penis policy circa 1973, "anything erect was edited out, anything limp was hung, if you know what I mean."

But who sees non-limp penises here? Let's zoom in on this watercolor fantasia a little and figure this out.

This painting is amazing, isnt it? Its called Two Sides of Self.
Good god I love this painting. Courtesy of the Artist and Seattle Art Museum

Still limp. Should we get closer?

I would just like to point out that the nipples are hard.
I would just like to point out that the nipples are hard. Courtesy of the Artist and Seattle Art Museum

Still too hard to say? Okay, okay, here:

The essence of tumescence is absent, in my view.
The essence of tumescence is absent, in my view. Courtesy of the Artist and Seattle Art Museum

The subtext: A hugely influential American art museum hosts a solo show by a woman, and then neuters her show because they deem her depiction of male genitalia inappropriate.

It's pretty easy to see why Shapiro was like: "All right, art world, you're a bunch of dicks, screw you." Those are my words. After the Whitney debacle, Shapiro started studying acupuncture and Chinese medicine and moved to Vashon Island and mostly disappeared from the art world. These days, she told Graves, "I usually show at the credit union on Vashon."