Comments

1
How do you even do that to a banana?
2
Tacoma is nice this time of year

But I don't believe you on the Hils thing
3
WOW, a glimpse into most liberal Seattle brain tissues, now we know why Trump won. Just kidding. Good luck with this shit. And, yes, T-Town rocks, it's actually diverse...not pretend. And have fun every now and then!
4
Just being an idiot, but what the hell is wrong with peeing outside when you've got to pee reasonably bad? (I guess this is pretty contingent on the pee-er being a guy. Ladies I imagine, would no doubt have some legitimate issues, though even they've gotta weigh the inconvenience against doing so against the discomfort of holding it in.)

So long as you're not doing so in public view, I couldn't imagine putting oneself through the strain of holding it in. Though I'm also 40+ years old and am finding said strain to be increasingly problematic. Probably need to see a freaking urologist. Ugh. Aging is idiotic.
5
What? No doughnuts?

Man, 2017 is really going to suck for you.
6
Seattle looks around itself, trying to break the doldrums of it's middle-class existence. It eyes Everett to the north, who beckons from afar. "Nah, not again". It casts its lazy eye Souithward, at that gritty, dirty city it desperately wants to fuck, and yet hopes none of it's friends will catch on.

We're not talking about Redmond sex, all awkward and proper on the flannel sheets, over and done with by 10 pm. This isn't methed out Puyallup sex, where everyone's hard and yet nobody cums. And this is definitely not that patchouli-as-a-substitute-for-soap Oly sex you grew out of after college. No, this is a deep, hard, industrial fucking that Seattle knows it needs so very bad. That dirty thing it can never get on those languid ferry rides from Bremerton. Seattle knows Tacoma will give it that dirty, nasty thing exactly the way it wants.

Tacoma is a town that came in a blind man's eye once. That man can now see.

Tacoma's Old City Hall got into a j/o context with the Washington Monument. The spooge landed in the Thea Foss Waterway, and became a major shipping port we all benefit from. Tacoma is a town whose hard ons block the harshest winter weather from the South Sound, protecting it while Olympia just cries pathetically in the rain.

Of course you're moving to Tacoma. We always knew you would. You just had to admit that to yourself. Now you're ready to move on to city that's Bigger. Harder. Grittier. Nastier. And so much more likely to give your the assquaking orgasm youve been pining for from the other side of I-5.

Yeah, we knew you'd wind up here eventually. Everyone does.
7
You need to get a life.

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