The Sexiest Trees in Seattle

Comments

Trees have a language. They have a history. The oldest fossils of trees show they play a part in our own evolution. We should not take them for granted, but cherish them. They are the unbroken link that connects all living things in the fabric of life.

Vince on June 17, 2009 at 11:37 AM

Love it. Love that you (presumably) thought to write it, love that the Stranger publishes such things. . . love it.

Violet_DaGrinder on June 17, 2009 at 1:00 PM

I was just struck completely smitten with that tree on 11th and John , not 4 days ago... lush, heavy-with-summer-leaves arms dipping down from arbory heights into the realm, the height of humanity. She's a queen of the local dryads, methinks.

Couldn't believe the kismety coincidence of seeing this article so soon after. Going to start me dwelling too much on Magical Thinking or other questionable theories...

Bravo, stranger & Charles. You went and got all useful and prettied-up all of a sudden, just when I was thinking you were overfull of tripe and overripe angst. Damn you. ;)

Rev.Smith on June 17, 2009 at 2:39 PM

omg i'm so excited that the monkey-tail tree made this list! i grew up living down the street from it and it has always been a landmark of my childhood... i loved that tree and its so wonderful to see that i'm not the only one!

justme on June 17, 2009 at 2:44 PM

I want to lay on a blanket underneath the Big One and watch its leaves dance with the sky. It makes me think of childhood.

on June 17, 2009 at 2:54 PM

i killed a tree yesterday... it was 51 years old and was attempting to drop tonnage on my family and our possessions. so i killed it ... some trees just can't be trusted. This one just had that going-to-let-mayhem-rule look to it. I still feel bad.

me on June 17, 2009 at 3:29 PM

Seriously? Only a lone evergreen in your entire line-up? What kind of Washingtonian are you? Not a single douglas fir or western red cedar in the bunch. Unacceptable. Charles Mudede is now officially an idiot when it comes to trees.

on June 17, 2009 at 5:39 PM

Great article! I have a gorgeous fig tree in my backyard that will be ready to harvest in a few weeks. Delicious, fresh figs.

Roosevelt on June 18, 2009 at 6:52 AM

There's an impossibly twisted and gnarled thousand-year-old Doug Fir at Deception Pass State Park that would blow your mind, Charles. I can also recommend the world's tallest spruces in Olympic National Park. Thank you for this wonderful article. I've loved that tree in Magnolia Park for all of my fifty years; I was taken there as a baby. Trees are wonderful.

Fnarf on June 18, 2009 at 9:22 AM

love those trees, just dont loooove those trees...

gnr8r on June 18, 2009 at 9:41 AM

What 2 said.

And, like 4, I'm a huge fan of monkey-puzzle trees too. They were always my favorites when I was growing up in Vancouver.

Corydon on June 18, 2009 at 10:12 AM

two more trees to love:
1) the palm (for their posture)
2) the joshua (for their distortion)

toby on June 18, 2009 at 4:06 PM

Trees have a reputation for being some type of noble creature but they are just as vicious as anything in the natural world. Their height is an evolved advantage that they use to smother out the smaller plants below. Their tactic in life is to grow upward and absorb as much sunlight as possible so that other plants don't do the same to them.

I see trees as less of a noble plant and more like a giant corporation who uses its sheer size to squash out the life of competitors below it. The trees of course care less about the birds and animals because there is no competition for sunlight and water. They only care to kill what is in their path so i suppose they are noble after all.

on June 18, 2009 at 5:00 PM

There used to be a HUGE monkey puzzle tree on the corner of 22nd and 73rd in Ballard. It was there ever since I was born, it had to be at least 100 feet tall. It got cut down in 2000 or something like that.

The CHZA on June 18, 2009 at 9:06 PM

Wow, that was a fucking retarded comment. There since I was born? OF COURSE IT WAS, IT WAS A FUCKING GIANT TREE.

The CHZA on June 18, 2009 at 9:08 PM

As soon as I saw the headline, I knew my tree would be on there! :o)

Nikkinuski on June 19, 2009 at 12:11 AM

I'll invoice you for 36 seconds of my life.

John Smith on June 19, 2009 at 4:52 AM

They also make nice buildings, furniture and firewood.

on June 19, 2009 at 6:47 AM

chas-- you gotta check Denny Park. great trees, best view of seattles changing architecture.

for reals.

on June 19, 2009 at 7:19 AM

You're the cutest thing that I ever did see
I really love your peaches
Want to shake your tree...

on June 19, 2009 at 10:14 AM

The other day I saw a tree that looked just like "The Big One"! Them, I saw one just like "The One That Scares Me", followed by a "Slender One." Then I realized they were just regular trees. Trees. On a breeze. Do you please?

on June 19, 2009 at 10:22 AM

I'm offended there are no cedars on this list.

cedarthvader on June 19, 2009 at 10:37 AM

wow, you lunatics are almost a parody of yourselves. haha!

on June 19, 2009 at 10:42 AM

You got posted to Fark's main page, Charles. Congrats...

http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLi…

on June 19, 2009 at 10:43 AM

THAT didn't work...

on June 19, 2009 at 10:44 AM

Stupid fuckin' hipster trees, if you really want to know what a hot tree looks like you should go to anywhere else in the country, not look at an asexual plant from seattle.

Seattle's Sexiest Baker (no I didn't get a date from it) on June 19, 2009 at 1:42 PM

The Big One is my tree, and it needs to be shaved just a tad, it's covering up the entrance to my mansion, and that ain't sexy.

AudreyK on June 19, 2009 at 4:26 PM

Charles, I hope you that if you haven't seen them already, you see the Sequoias/redwoods in California.

Y.F. Redux on June 19, 2009 at 5:40 PM

In extreme South-West Washington, there is an island on the inside of the Long Beach Peninsula called Long Island that has original old growth, it has never been logged. It has some amazingly huge old Cedar trees, almost as big as California Red Woods. You have to get to the island by boat, though. Bring a raft or canoe.

Roosevelt on June 20, 2009 at 4:42 PM

Huge Old Alder Trees in a Row.

Taken down for a six pack.
In the spring.
Baby birds falling.
Mommy birds screaming.
DPD claims they are 'trash trees'
that don't live long.

Lies and Murders

on June 21, 2009 at 12:03 AM

i love the big one. i am privileged to live just around the corner from it and have walked past it lo these many decades.

one night in 1981 when i was walking home at night and passed under the tree some mouth breather grabbed my butt and ran away. if only the tree had had come alive and beaten him to death with one of its branches.

scary tyler moore on June 21, 2009 at 12:18 PM

The book Trees of Seattle by Arthur Lee Jacobson is an excellent guide to local trees with many documented examples. I bet some of these are in there.

Reg on June 21, 2009 at 7:09 PM

When I was doing my undergrad at Seattle U, one of the girls in my theology class kept gushing about the giant oak in front of the Admin building. She had named it Barnacle and seemed to have quite the connection with the tree. I was giving her crap about it, because... really, Barnacle? Not a stuffy aristocratic English name? And then she pointed out to me that Barnacle had chosen his name specifically, and was in fact a celebrity that only needed one name, "like Cher, Madonna or Barnacle." She was completely deadpan the entire time and was totally serious. Only in Seattle... or maybe Portland.

on June 21, 2009 at 11:41 PM

This is really cool, damn funny.hahaha amazing

Regards,
Rajj
http://itshumour.blogspot.com

on June 23, 2009 at 4:29 AM

hey!!!you forgot one other tree...the one smoking in your mouth!HA HA HA!!!!GO STICK A TREE UP YOUR ASS!!!GOT WOOD???,GO DIE FROM SPLINTER POISONING,FUCKTARD!!!FUCK YOU PAUL BUYUN!!!

the legend of zelda on June 23, 2009 at 5:04 PM

how about the deku tree from ocarina of time???or how about from the wind waker??or the lost woods???

the legend of zelda on June 23, 2009 at 5:18 PM

seattle trees suck!!!!!what a waste of paper talking about trees!!!i think the stranger has too much time on it"s hands...any body recycle this paper???no it litters the street!!!

the legend of zelda on June 23, 2009 at 5:23 PM

Great article! Thank you so much. I am currently nominating The Big One for heritage status. The Big One is the beautiful tree pictured at E. John & 11th . It was so cool to see it honored in The Stranger. Wanted to let people know about The Heritage Tree Program, which is an important avenue to protect these lovely trees from harm. It is coordinated through Plant Amnesty and the City of Seattle. To nominate a sexy tree, call 206/684-8733 or access online forms @ www.seattle.gov/transportation/heritaget…;.
Thanks again,
JL Dahl

JL Dahl on June 24, 2009 at 11:06 AM

I got married under "The Slender One". I'm glad to see other people appreciating it.

on June 24, 2009 at 6:21 PM

The evergreens in Seattle aren't as amazing, they are commonplace. Plus, the most amazing of them were logged long ago by the Maynards and Denny's and Yesler's of the city - what's left, within city limits, are arguably not the best samples of the cedar, fir, etc.
Not to mention it's the spring/summer border right now, and the deciduous are in their prime (whereas conifers come into their prime in the snow).

Honorable mention idea: the odd 2 or 3 non-conifer trees (one was razed recently... *pout*) on the corner of Olive Way and Bolyston that stay green all winter. I love those guys and their misplaced stubborn tenacity.

troll zelda: it's nice though to see a paper honor its raw material so respectfully.

Rev.Smith on June 26, 2009 at 12:02 AM

You forgot this sexy breasty Madrona tree in Lincoln Park!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/edenweaver/…

eden on June 27, 2009 at 2:37 AM

oh yeah?than if your paper is so respectful,why dosen't it go 100% internet like the p-i did???think about that!!!oh and one more thing, i am not a troll,i'm a HYRULEAN,WRONG RACE RETARD!!!

the legend of zelda on June 27, 2009 at 2:10 PM

Anybody know what kind of tree the "crazy-looking one" is?

on July 9, 2009 at 8:10 AM

check this http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseac…

henri van zanten on July 21, 2009 at 3:35 PM

There are two trees in Seattle that always stop me in my tracks. One is like The Big One, but it's at Aloha & 16th. They extended the corner curb just for it, and I think there are mosaics or some sort of odds & ends in the cement. When the leaves turn, it's a canopy of color.

The other one is one mother of a tree right in the middle of a Discovery Park trail. It's so impressive that the trail splits in two and surrounds the tree.

Rose on September 16, 2009 at 11:57 AM

The Sexiest Trees in Seattle

Six Carbon Creatures I'm in Love With

Comments

Please wait...

Add a comment

Preview

Editors' Picks

Is Bellevue Dying?

Church or Cult?

Ivar's and the Serial Killer

Bad Apples

Seattle Needs a Slum

The Need for Rent Control

Support The Stranger

Six Carbon Creatures I'm in Love With

Comments

Please wait...

Add a comment

Preview

Editors' Picks

Just Can't Get Enough?

Sign up for our newsletter for news recaps, updates, and more!