Features Jan 22, 2014 at 4:00 am

Belltown Diary

The Side of the City You See When You Live in a Public Garden Frequented by Belltown Bros and Homeless Junkies

Cienna Madrid
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Comments

1
Or we could just stuff you in the freezer, if it's not too full of mystery poops.
MacCrocodile on January 22, 2014 at 10:26 AM Report this
3
Nothing says "badass" like needing to provide a dozen examples to prove just how badass you like totally are.

seatownr on January 22, 2014 at 10:51 AM Report this
4
Thank you for reaffirming why I am so much more a cat person. This is magnificent. I'm very happy to think of you down there. If you need companionship in the neighborhood check out one of the Apex Co-op's potlucks. Heavy on the ancient grains, but they're a good touchstone if you ever feel too surrounded by the bro-tards.
TomJohnsonJr on January 22, 2014 at 12:16 PM Report this
5
Thank you for sharing. I have always wondered who was lucky/unlucky enough to live there.
bitchkitty22 on January 22, 2014 at 12:29 PM Report this
6
the word badass (@3'seatownr') never crossed my mind while reading this... which I thoroughly enjoyed. Thanks Cienna! Totally enjoyed your reactions and their rendering into words.
Funny how often a comment says way more about the commenter than the subject at hand. Way too many folks stuck in perpetual judgment mode.
snoopy on January 22, 2014 at 1:41 PM Report this
7
Damn it, I miss you so much Cienna. Great piece of writing.
Luckier on January 22, 2014 at 6:16 PM Report this
9
Is it really a novelty to live in a neighborhood where 911 is on speed dial? Is it hypocritical for The Stranger to tow the counter-culture policy of cop hating only to use them, thus demonstrating their value in this article? While I appreciate the author's sense of adventure, this piece has the slight odor of Rich White Girl Syndrome, complete with an explanation of why we white people act so entitled all the time.
repete on January 23, 2014 at 7:09 AM Report this
10
This is really wonderful. Thank you for sharing.
on January 23, 2014 at 7:46 AM Report this
11
Re: Mystery dude's wang.

Wang computers were outcompeted by Apple MacIntoshes and "Wintel" PC's in the 1980's and Wang Laboratories was required to declare bankruptcy in 1992. No wonder he was unable to find any Wangs!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wang_Labora…
Big Matt G on January 23, 2014 at 8:11 AM Report this
12
Cienna. Thank you! I work at a social services agency in Belltown and go to school across the street from your house. This is a fantastic picture of the array of life in the neighborhood and an especially helpful reminder that the folks I'm often most scared of aren't the ones I need to worry about. Thank you!
Annie Mesaros on January 23, 2014 at 10:36 AM Report this
13
"To this day it remains a mystery."
I fucking adore you, Mother Theresa.
kerfuffle on January 23, 2014 at 11:59 AM Report this
14
Thank you for this piece. It truly put a smile on my face and broke up the monotony of the day.
on January 23, 2014 at 1:37 PM Report this
16
Such a great article - to hell with all the haters.
lunch break on January 23, 2014 at 4:39 PM Report this
17
I enjoy the writing style of Ms. Madrid's article, excepting the anachronism contained in:

"Then he ripped several stakes out of the ground and threw them. By the time he got around to heaving bricks, I was dialing 911."

I'm nearly certain Ms. Madrid did not "dial" 911, as telephones no longer have "dials" unless Ms. Madrid owns a vintage Western Electric twisted-pair, or similar analog, or retro-design model. A careful writer avoids confusing "dialing" with calling, or "filming" with audio-video recording, or simply, recording.

These terms are not equal, and there is such a thing as "Standard English", a term worthy of investigation.

[Yes, I know it is typical of style guides in the U.S. to place clause punctuation within quotations, but it makes no sense and it isn't "standard" English.]
Texas10R on January 23, 2014 at 6:37 PM Report this
18
Great article. I laughed, I gasped, I shuddered, I chuckled.

Thanks!
LMcGuff on January 23, 2014 at 7:13 PM Report this
19
Very nice piece of writing, I enjoyed spending a few moments with you in the garden. Thanks for writing this. Beautiful.
on January 23, 2014 at 7:19 PM Report this
20
I love the part about seeing Mr. Sex-fanatic at the swanky event! Great piece.
katrat on January 23, 2014 at 10:12 PM Report this
21
@17, pedantic and wrong at the same time.

Great piece, Cienna.
gdcv on January 24, 2014 at 12:29 AM Report this
22
great story! no wonder you don't need a TV! and yes beware of the east-side, weekend visiting Dbags, they are serial rapists.
kellyllek on January 24, 2014 at 10:45 AM Report this
23
Very entertaining and a great reminder why I don't like living in the city.
shlibotnik on January 24, 2014 at 11:04 AM Report this
24
Wait, did you brush your dog's teeth after, well, you know?

(and I loved reading this!)
Kelly O on January 24, 2014 at 11:10 AM Report this
25
Cienna, you are one tough cookie to live there. Great to hear from you... miss reading your words.
Richard G in PDX on January 24, 2014 at 12:44 PM Report this
26
I never comment here, but I just wanted to say that I loved this piece. Thank you for entertaining me.
blabbenezer on January 24, 2014 at 1:12 PM Report this
27
What a damn good piece! One of the most enjoyable reads in a long time. Way to be one with the people-- or most. You rock!
Ay yai yai on January 24, 2014 at 2:41 PM Report this
28
great fuckin article, marry me.
Gerald Jones on January 24, 2014 at 5:17 PM Report this
29
A great story incredibly well told. Thanks.
CBSeattle on January 24, 2014 at 11:10 PM Report this
30
Awesome article, Cienna! Too many highlights for me to choose from.
Tom_Rakewell on January 25, 2014 at 1:21 AM Report this
31
LOVE THIS. Thank you.
ooppoddoo on January 25, 2014 at 9:41 AM Report this
33
I have been reading The Stranger for nearly ten years and can honestly admit this is one of my favorite articles (top ten, anyway). Kudos, Cienna...

And to think I used to live two blocks from the patch and NEVER knew any of this.
maco04 on January 25, 2014 at 4:58 PM Report this
34
You really are Mother Theresa for getting anywhere near human poop. I can't...I just can't! I won't set foot in a public restroom, I try not to touch doors, benches, bus poles, etc. because it's all covered in semen, blood and poop. But somebody has to and thank God it's you and not me. Anyway, great story. To those accusing you of being a privileged white girl slumming in the garden, a privileged white girl would have left that place withing a week, like the other residents did. Plus, privileged white girls don't touch other people's poop*.

*I really think I'll die if I touch human poop.
james_from_cambridge on January 25, 2014 at 6:48 PM Report this
35
Thanks so much for this - great piece. I'd have to imagine you could write a book out of the past 5 years there - sort of an anti-Walden. I'd read it.
Guybrarian on January 25, 2014 at 10:03 PM Report this
36
@9 - The Stranger is not "cop-hating." There is a difference between hating cops and pointing out the deficiencies and problems in the police force and/or specific incidences of misconduct (i.e., creating accountability; i.e., one of the primary responsiblities of a free press). In addition, I think you should look up the defintion of hypocrite. Using something you hate does not make you a hypocrite. Lots of people hate the subway, but they ride it to work every day--they are not hypocrites.
brent.b on January 27, 2014 at 1:48 PM Report this
37
This made me laugh out loud.. I once lived on 45th in Wallingford, not too scary, you might think, but we were next to the food bank, and our house used to be full of crack dealers before it was sold and we remodeled. Some people never realized it had been sold... It was scary there sometimes.. Yes, Wallingford. Scary.

Anyway, I have also had interactions with poop from inebriated humans, and I will leave it there.
Chandira on January 28, 2014 at 10:00 AM Report this
38
This is super funny. Thanks. Also, I wish that I had your aplomb.
jrcsfo on January 28, 2014 at 1:50 PM Report this
39
Shades of Richard Brautigan here! Wonderful, descriptive verse!
on January 28, 2014 at 1:58 PM Report this
40
Thoroughly appreciate this story.
I wish there were more people able and willing to spell out like Cienna has the reality of the not-so-pleasant-aspects of living in certain parts of Seattle versus just avoiding them entirely, or portraying all of Seattle as some kind of never ending Starbucks Experience.
DMar on January 28, 2014 at 8:17 PM Report this
42
Wonderful.
seandr on January 28, 2014 at 11:16 PM Report this
43
I live in a very, very small town in North Dakota. There are buildings near you that contain more people than live in this entire little berg.

As gentle of a person and soul you seem to come across as, YOU SCARE ME!

(maybe because living there does NOT seem to scare you!)

But you DO know how to garden.

I am with the earlier commenter: "Will you marry me?".

May your house be safe from Tigers.

Small Town ND on January 29, 2014 at 1:51 AM Report this
44
This is wonderful, Cienna. I'm so glad to hear you're still there! May those cottages stand for another hundred (or thousand) years.
Cody Walker on January 31, 2014 at 1:53 PM Report this
45
This article is amazing. I used to do social work in Belltown and regularly experienced the aggressive drug-dealing/ugly side world of drug use while walking to get lunch most days. (not to mention dealing with is as work)

Belltown is/was a fascinating place; thanks for capturing it so well in this piece of writing.
Ph-baller on February 1, 2014 at 12:11 AM Report this
46
Thank you Stranger! I'm just a guy from the Twin Cities (MN). Never been to Seattle (yet). I've read the Stranger for years and enjoy learning about it's neighborhoods and culture. This diary is great!
roonerjeff on February 2, 2014 at 9:31 AM Report this
47
this is great. i always thought those cottages looked cool.
Larry Mizell, Jr. on February 5, 2014 at 3:40 PM Stranger Staff
48
Thank you Cienna for a great article. I live near the p-patch and was walking past just a week or so ago and wondered what was happening with the cottages and if anyone was living there. They always seemed so charming, but I had heard that early residents were scared away by the local "ambience".
I'm so glad you are able to make it work. They are wonderful (historic) little houses. When I walked by it looked as if there was some work (exterior painting?) going on.
crone on February 6, 2014 at 1:32 AM Report this
49
I enjoyed this piece very much. it was fast paced and truly funny in a unique way. Cienna Madrid is a very fine writer and I love her name.
Cakecamus on February 10, 2014 at 2:22 PM Report this
50
Is this article satire?
on February 22, 2014 at 3:53 PM Report this
51
great. another yuppie idiot moves to my city.
on March 2, 2014 at 12:52 AM Report this

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