12:26 PM yesterday delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: A Little History Lesson....
@21 thank you, VERY informative on restraining orders.

Hope Dan is reading these as he sometimes recommends ROs on the Lovecast. He seeks expert guests for sex research and medical stuff, and gay marriage law, but whenever he gets to other aspects of law he seems clueless and not even realizing he needs an expert.

He didn't mention RO this time (although he did mention revenge porn laws) but he is usually way off on the law and doesn't even realize it.

His worst ignorance-of-the-law (which as we all know is no excuse): he often recommends one partner in a about-to-up or DTMFA couple just moves out even if they're both on a shared lease.

I don't know much about restraining orders but I know a lot about landlord tenant law, and you do NOT want to break a lease like that! Unless you're planning on paying ALL the rent for the rest of the lease AND any damage your ex does to the apartment / holdover and eviction expenses, or having your credit ruined, a potential judgment against you, wage garnishment depending on the jurisdiction and legal resources of the landlord... and debt collectors hounding you for the next decade. (Written as a small time landlord who would go broke if tenants shafted the landlord, and barely breaks even most years until decades down the road when eventually, maybe I can sell and retire if my tenants haven't beaten my property to shit, and so I know this area of law somewhat well. BTW, not all of us landlords are 1%ers, ya know!)
12:08 AM yesterday delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: A Little History Lesson....
SLOGgers are much smarter than Dan on this one. Clinton and Letterman doing straight shit to less powerful women, they get a pass. Same with the inappropriate outing of that bi Condé Nast CFO with a taste for wacko rent boys. But a bi kinky low power low status guy -- maybe not.

And what happened? Did Dan's advice work out?

Enquiring minds want to know!

Can't whoever at the Stranger helps Dan pick a SLLOD out of the archives shoot off an email to the original LW and ask first? Or if Dan is picking these recycles, can't he shoot off an email himself with a boilerplate "I'm gonna re-run your letter -- care to update us?"
Aug 24 delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Natural Vs. Unnatural Threesomes.
@12: "Sex without sober consent is rape...yep, even among very good friends."


Highly intoxicated people can't give consent.

But there are degrees of intoxication that are not sober, not safe for driving, yet are well within the capacity to give consent!
Aug 23 delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: One and Done?.
@12 @13 agree Zika in piss is a minor risk, less than other types of sex.

But Dan dispenses evidence based advice and it could have been a chance to educate.

Sex educator friends tell me most people do NOT know that you can have a symptom-free STI in your genitalia and pass them to your partner's throat (usually from oral sex). Most docs do NOT check throat culture for STIs unless you ask. There's been a huge surge in asymptomatic gonorrhea, not trivial, so educating the public about this is not a minor issue. A piss letter gives a chance to let people know that oral sex as well as piss can transmit all kinds of stuff.

@14 Agree, maybe just youth or LW is very very vanilla, but this is a low bar for "one and done." Pissing *on* someone is pretty mild.

And "one and done" is unrealistic. If you have a kink especially one that is low risk and easy to accommodate, you don't want one time and then have to jack off to the memory of it the rest of your life!
Aug 22 delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: One and Done?.
Needs updating post-zika virus. While the CDC does not consider urine a threat, a June 2016 case in France found high zika viral levels in semen and urine, high enough to transmit from urine alone.

And you can 100% transmit trichomoniasis, gonorrhea, chlamydia from urine pissed onto a cock esp. if he's jacking his cock, entry into the urethra.

This guy wants his GF to piss on him, so the risk is mostly his. But even if his GF has an STI in her pussy, by pissing it to his cock, he could then pass it to her mouth if she blows him, giving her a secondary infection of her own STI in her throat.

And if he outsources it as @3 suggests, then there is risk to her.

Sex has some risks (even if they are fluid bonded, she could be cheating on him). Watersports has less risk than penis-in-vagina sex, as there is no skin-skin contact.

PS. I know at least one gay watersports fan who has had had hundreds of dudes piss on him without any problems. So far. :)
Aug 21 delta35 commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Quick Hits.
@3 totally agree. Moving to liberal cities isn't so easy for most people. If you're young, they are now prohibitively expensive -- very different from the 1980s / early 1990s. And if you're older, and have a good job someplace less trendy, can be *very* difficult to get an equally good job in a trendy place unless you are a superstar.
Aug 21 delta35 commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Quick Hits.
PISS is Google impaired. Plenty of boxer briefs with fly, including wicking modal, even mini boxer briefs with actual zippers. (Watch out for those.)

Openings in boxer briefs are handy for masturbating / getting blow jobs with buttonfly jeans on. Pulling down the underwear band isn't comfy and taking them off / sliding them halfway down spoils the effect of jacking it / blowing someone / getting blown while you / he are wearing jeans.
Aug 16 delta35 commented on Savage Love.
As to why most healthcare providers won't prescribe HPV vaccine over the CDC recommended age range -- while it is legal and ethical to do so, there is a very tiny possibility of an adverse reaction to any vaccine (and a fairly significant case of stiff muscles and soreness at injection site). And patients sometimes sue or kick up a fuss and they can point to the off-label use (outside of age range / patient population in the FDA trials) as "evidence" the MD was being bad.

And sometimes health insurance won't reimburse outside of recommended age range and patients won't pay back the doc, and the vaccine is quite expensive and the doc doesn't want to have to get hit with it especially in a family practice where they don't make much money.

Medicare might pay the doc $85 for the office visit, and she / he gets stuck $177 a dose for the vaccine if the health insurance doesn't pay and the patient shafts the doc.
Aug 16 delta35 commented on Savage Love.
@12, DrTom is right HPV vaccine can help at any age if you haven't been exposed to a particular strain, and the 9-valent vaccine is new and improved, and will not be harmful (small risk of side effects always but trivial) even if you have been exposed.

But generally speaking, most healthcare providers will *not* prescribe a vaccine outside of the CDC recommended age ranges, even though it is legal and ethical to do so.

So TOP will likely have to hunt around. When I got HPV vaccine I had to call MANY health care providers before I found one willing to prescribe over-the-age-range. Planned Parenthood is a good suggestion.

TOP also needs to read up on STIs -- cold sores are cause by HSV and the HPV vaccine doesn't help with this. Nor do condoms as herpes can easily be transmitted skin-to-skin even with a condom (something the regular Dan reminds people of).

Also, there are over 20 strains of wart-causing HPV viruses, so even 9-valent HPV vaccine doesn't protect against all of the wart-causing HPV strains. And it may prevent esophageal and rectal cancers, not just cervical cancers.
Aug 16 delta35 commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Blown Opportunities.
@4 yup, I get HUGER as well, not HUNGER. And given the Trump ref in Dan's answer, HUGER is more appropriate as Mr. Trump is bigly huge.

@17 we know masturbation can make you go blind, but any kind of sex? Ohhh myyyyyy. :)