Jun 8
mother of two commented on SL Letter of the Day: The Grateful Cuckold.
I agree with Fishface @19. While I suppose it is unlikely this is EFFED's husband, it certainly sounds like a household with exactly the same sexual dynamic.
Jun 4
mother of two commented on Savage Love.
Heartbroken, Try couples counseling for a few sessions. Not because it will help you get back together -- like Dan, I can't imagine being able to trust someone after all that, that is WAY worse than a simple sexual peccadillo -- but because good couples therapists help lots of couples through divorce, and may help you negotiate a suitable post-divorce relationship. You have kids, so you probably can't just walk away from him forever. You two may share child care, or child support, and will probably have to be in the same room for important events in your kids' lives, like graduation and marriage. I know a few couples who have used a "divorce therapist" this way, and most have found it helpful.
Also, get a good lawyer.
Best wishes.
Also, get a good lawyer.
Best wishes.
May 29
mother of two commented on SL Letter of the Day: Seconded.
I have a friend whose husband left her for a woman he had only met on-line. (Playing WOW, not SL.) I think there's a huge difference between sex in Second Life and porn. SL is more like phone sex. As others have said, there's a real person on the other end. (Although possibly another man-pretending-to-be-a-woman.)
I don't know that I'd call it adultery, but I think this guy is violating his wife's trust. And not like "sneaking to view porn" or "fantasizing about other woman", which I agree are minor, but really violating trust by having a sexual relationship with someone else.
I don't know that I'd call it adultery, but I think this guy is violating his wife's trust. And not like "sneaking to view porn" or "fantasizing about other woman", which I agree are minor, but really violating trust by having a sexual relationship with someone else.
May 29
mother of two commented on SL Letter of the Day: Back in the Saddle.
This is one of the best re-runs I'e seen.
May 21
mother of two commented on Savage Love.
WSN: was the rubbing up against each other consensual? Or did that make you uncomfortable even without knowing that he came?
If the rubbing was consensual, I think you have to forgive the boy. As Dan points out, teenage boys don't have a lot of control over their own bodies, and I bet he didn't realize what was happening until it was too late, either. That's sort of what "exploration" means.
If you contact him, and tell him how hurt you feel, he will probably apologize (unless he takes the advice of the person who points out that you could use that against him) but others are probably right that he doesn't remember the matter the same way you do. He probably remembers that he lost control, not that "he used you".
Now, if he was holding you down, and you were too scared and confused to push him off of you, and finally he came and then he freed you - then you were certainly violated. But in that case, the odds of him apologizing are very low. Because he's probably still a pos.
Either way, I don't think you gain anything by contacting him. I think you would do better to talk to a therapist, or overlay the memory with happier ones, or write a letter to yourself, or, I don't know, almost anything would be better than to drag him back into this at this late date. I just don't see much upside to that.
Good luck.
More...
If the rubbing was consensual, I think you have to forgive the boy. As Dan points out, teenage boys don't have a lot of control over their own bodies, and I bet he didn't realize what was happening until it was too late, either. That's sort of what "exploration" means.
If you contact him, and tell him how hurt you feel, he will probably apologize (unless he takes the advice of the person who points out that you could use that against him) but others are probably right that he doesn't remember the matter the same way you do. He probably remembers that he lost control, not that "he used you".
Now, if he was holding you down, and you were too scared and confused to push him off of you, and finally he came and then he freed you - then you were certainly violated. But in that case, the odds of him apologizing are very low. Because he's probably still a pos.
Either way, I don't think you gain anything by contacting him. I think you would do better to talk to a therapist, or overlay the memory with happier ones, or write a letter to yourself, or, I don't know, almost anything would be better than to drag him back into this at this late date. I just don't see much upside to that.
Good luck.
May 18
mother of two commented on Slog Overnight.
What's with the bestiality on SLOG this week?
The kitten was trying to suckle. Must have been disappointed.
The kitten was trying to suckle. Must have been disappointed.
May 17
mother of two commented on Remember This Guy?.
There's a really important factual question there: was he actually raped, or is he making that up? Because if he was drugged and raped, I'm kinda sympathetic. But if some good samaritan put him up for the night and he freaked out and murdered him, that's a very different story.
And I suppose we will never know what really happened.
And I suppose we will never know what really happened.
May 11
mother of two commented on Your Dog Sucks.
@163, my sister used to have that problem. People can be really dumb.
To all you people who are worried about grabbing the collar because it's dangerous: The dog was a BEAGLE. Beagles are used in nasty medical experiments because they are so unlikely to bite people. And Dan didn't describe it doing anything aggressive, just trying to steal food, which is a very beagle-like (or dog-like, really) thing for it to do. And Dan is a dog owner, and the odds are really good he knows how to grab a dog by the collar.
I've collected 3 stray dogs by grabbing the collar. None of them was acting aggressive, or I wouldn't have done it, of course. All were lost. Two of the owners were super grateful, and the other was super weird.
Also, where I live, the cops respond to animal control complaints if the animal control officer isn't available, and they respond quickly. That's certainly worth a try, especially if the animal might be dangerous. I have no problem with slapping away a nuisance dog, except that it doesn't solve the problem, it just pushes it to the next picnicking family over.
More...
To all you people who are worried about grabbing the collar because it's dangerous: The dog was a BEAGLE. Beagles are used in nasty medical experiments because they are so unlikely to bite people. And Dan didn't describe it doing anything aggressive, just trying to steal food, which is a very beagle-like (or dog-like, really) thing for it to do. And Dan is a dog owner, and the odds are really good he knows how to grab a dog by the collar.
I've collected 3 stray dogs by grabbing the collar. None of them was acting aggressive, or I wouldn't have done it, of course. All were lost. Two of the owners were super grateful, and the other was super weird.
Also, where I live, the cops respond to animal control complaints if the animal control officer isn't available, and they respond quickly. That's certainly worth a try, especially if the animal might be dangerous. I have no problem with slapping away a nuisance dog, except that it doesn't solve the problem, it just pushes it to the next picnicking family over.
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