I am a kinky bi babe who is highly involved my local BDSM community Interested?… more »

Mar 14, 2014 daphne24 commented on Polyamory Was Definitely the Problem.
@25 - you got farther than I did. I couldn't get past this in the first paragraph - "And with each of Jason’s thrusts, a swell of water cascaded over the lip of the tub to the deck below. The sound of water slapping wood blended with the couple’s moans in an oddly syncopated rhythm. It was a pretty slick groove, actually — somewhere between bossa nova and Barry White."
Mar 12, 2014 daphne24 commented on Savage Love.
I too saw the contradiction in what LW2 said - she wants more fulfilling sex but kink without sex. And yet, I'm not sure these are mutually exclusive.

I play with people I'm not having sex with pretty frequently. Which means I go home and often have awesome sex with my girlfriend (who is also part of the local community, btw). Sometimes that sex involves our kinks, sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes, the outlet of having played recently is enough to make that sex better.

It's a different situation from hers, but I have to think that what she's looking for is not impossible to find. Especially if her husband knows she's getting non-sexual needs filled elsewhere.
Jan 30, 2014 daphne24 commented on Savage Love.
We must be spoiled locally because I can name several dominant women in my area who would consider playing with someone new and not expect sex or a relationship after.

Further, if a guy showed up at a munch and said "my wife knows I'm here and just isn't into this" it would actually be refreshing. I can totally respect that. It's the ones who say, "I need to be discreet because my wife doesn't know and wouldn't understand" that bother me. And if the wife wanted to come out just to meet the rest of us, that would be great too.

But that's just me. YMMV. Etc. Etc.
Jan 29, 2014 daphne24 commented on Savage Love.
I want to add that a pro isn't the only way for a person to explore their kinky side, non-sexually, outside of their marriage. Depending on where they live, there may be clubs and BDSM groups that get together and include dominant women who he could actually get to know and play with occasionally. My home group has several who would happily beat him and then send him home to his wife. And our parties are far less than $200/a pop.

Oh and kudos for getting Mollena's advice - she is pretty awesome and I can't recommend her and Lee's book enough.
Dec 4, 2013 daphne24 commented on Savage Love.
Just a note for HNU - my girlfriend and I have been together a few years now. We don't live together.

We have never said the love word. Frankly, it's not something either of us are terribly comfortable with. Instead, we say "I like you." A lot. All the time. And this works for me because I think you can love someone without liking them. I think love can easily be taken for granted. But reminding your significant other that you genuinely like them and enjoy being around them...that is much more satisfying to me.

So yes, I find this normal that you haven't said the love word yet. I don't even find it necessary. Find your own way of expressing it :)
Oct 18, 2013 daphne24 commented on "Is this man actually allowed to use the street and the telephone?".
@5 - I'm with you :)
Oct 16, 2013 daphne24 commented on Savage Love.
@7 and @25 - Agreed with both. I thought that sounded like a reasonable thing to say myself. It's something I would want to hear actually instead of having someone make assumptions about how I was feeling. I think 25 is spot on that she is just used to shouldering the blame or having him blame her for this.
Sep 27, 2013 daphne24 commented on SL Letter of the Day: There Are Two Sides to Every Story.
I cannot wait for next week's installment. Oh Dan, please tell us there will be a next chapter in this soap opera!

Taciturnly yours...
Jul 19, 2013 daphne24 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Fun with Frying Pans.
I am highly involved in my local kink community and we actually happen to have a pretty high percentage of female tops and dominants. Every one of them cares deeply about the Nexuses (Nexi?) of Joy they work on. Largely because, you know, they actually want to use those parts for their own joy at some point.
Jun 13, 2013 daphne24 commented on SLLOTD: Blessed be the Ties that Bind.
Yes, Twisted Monk is still around. Other great book resource books - Lee Harrington's Shibari You Can Use (Part 2 coming out soon - woot!) and the two Two Knotty Boys books. All have wonderful step-by-step instructions for some great ties.