saxfanatic
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Feb 24 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Being A Couple & Sleeping in Separate Beds Is Cool, Too.
That should be"another person’s sweaty, warm, farting, flailing and snoring body". Trust me.
Feb 14 saxfanatic commented on Michael Flynn: That Deescalated Quickly, Over And Out, You're Fired, Etc..
"Nightmare-a-Lago"? Yes, that's where he should be sent.
Feb 13 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Facebook Stalking Pharmacist Questions His Ethics.
Unlike, well, everyone else here, I'm not ready to pile onto PILL just yet.
First, he said that he works for a pharmacy chain. He didn't say he was a pharmacist or any other form of healthcare professional.
Secondly, is the "health information" we're wringing our hands over their names? Sheesh!
Regardless of whatever he might know, there's no indication that PILL has disclosed any confidential information to anyone. Nor does it seem like a power imbalance is being exploited here.
As it stands, there's plausible deniability here. Just because he became acquainted with some people who were customers at his previous workplace doesn't mean sending a friend request is betraying anyone or violating anything.
Feb 1 saxfanatic commented on God Is Into Chastity Play.
That had more phallic imagery than The Ambiguously Gay Duo. That's one hell of an artistic achievement!
Jan 27 saxfanatic commented on SL Letter of the Day: One and Done?.
@2: I think Dan's maxim that for every relationship 'oral sex comes standard' should be amended to include squeegees for piss-play too. Problem solved!
Jan 19 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Reader Advice Round-Up.
"Grabbing a cold Schlitz" was never so problematic.
Jan 7 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Snooper Boyfriend Keeps Snooping Through Passed Out Girlfriend's Phone.
@BDF: Oh, right, that makes more sense. D'oh, so much needless sharing!

Anyway, I don't see Dan promising SOS a saved relationship, let alone trying to get SOS to emulate him in any way - except this: He too should think outside the box.
Jan 7 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Snooper Boyfriend Keeps Snooping Through Passed Out Girlfriend's Phone.
I'll take the "bi person" assessment as a compliment, LavaGirl. Actually I'm a, let's say, 85% wommin-lovin' manly-man. My partner and past partners have all been girly-girls with whom I've had monogamous relationships. As I've grown older and less testosterone-driven and more human, however, I've become much more sympathetic to my non-straight relatives, colleagues and clients.

I'd like to say that I have made openly-gay friends outside of work and family but I can't think of anyone who I considered a friend who came out to me. I want to be a kind and trustworthy person. Someone confiding in me would be a strong confirmation of that. That's a big part of why I read Savage Love.

Having said all that, my intention wasn't to take a swipe at Dan, the LW, his GF, commenters here or anyone else. Nor did I mean to advocate for any of many, many options SOS has for keeping what he wants to keep and avoiding what he wants to avoid.

SOS has to make a choice and stop being passive about the relationship he wants.

Jan 7 saxfanatic commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Snooper Boyfriend Keeps Snooping Through Passed Out Girlfriend's Phone.
Ouch! Reading this letter is hitting a nerve.

The relationship as it has existed is clearly dead. LW and GF know it. Their words and actions clearly demonstrate it. Yeah, Dan's advice is really out there but let's face: if Savage Love readers - including SOS - wanted conventional advice they would have stuck with Dear Ann.

Where Dan and Ann would see eye-to-eye, I imagine, is that LW and GF are going to have to communicate w-a-y better. They might turn to their pastor (à la Ann) for counselling, or they might just seize the bull by the horns and hammer out terms for a monogamish relationship (à la Dan)... or maybe a try a little from both playbooks.

Whatever they do, whether they stay in this relationship or move to other people, they are going to have to clearly and directly express their needs and to listen to their partner(s).

I wish them luck.