Jul 14, 2016
commented on Some Pokémon Go Enthusiasts Are Saying the Game Is Good for Their Mental Health
I mean, it's not exactly bleeding-edge neuroscience. When everything feels awful and you've lost hope and an overactive brain is paralyzing every effort you make to fix things, a simple, goal-oriented activity that gets you outside and active and interacting with others can genuinely save your life.
It's not a distraction or a fad if it encourages behaviors that are actually therapeutic by any standard of care.
And honestly, all the complaints people are making about being distracted in public on phones are hardly new. There are just a whole lot of people out doing them right now. This is a totally new thing and people will get better at it with a little time and practice, just like literally every new thing that people ever do.
Mar 22, 2016
this guy is every poly nightmare made flesh
keep that baby if you want to, but be prepared to fight in court to keep this impossible lying Mephistopheles son of a bitch out of your life and your child's life. don't have that baby if you can't afford a damn good law firm.
Mar 17, 2016
commented on Bernie or Hillary: The SECB Meets at 3 PM Today
Oh, like it's a choice. Remember how Hillary only got on board with marriage equality in 2013 once it was totally safe and she didn't actually have to do anything for anyone?
Fuck that. I wish we could have a woman president, and I'll reluctantly vote for her if she's nominated, but Bernie is the guy who has actually been sticking his neck out and fighting for equality, of all kinds, his whole career. Say what you like about "getting things done" or whatever, but you're a damn fool if you trust a Clinton.
Jan 20, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: How Can I Unscrew This Screwed Pooch?
Oh, oh, ouch, this hits a little too close to home. The painful insecurity and lack of well-defined personal needs and boundaries is me to a T until pretty recently. I've even been in a similar situation recently, though thankfully not quite so catastrophic because I have the flexibility of being poly.
Sorry, AYR, but you're the problem here. That doesn't mean you're a bad person; it just means you're trying to be a good person in a simplistic, fearful, halfhearted way. You're going to have to grow up and make decisions and be honest and forthright with people, and sometimes that's going to mean hurting them a little to spare yourself and them more pain in the long run. Sometimes it's even going to involve hurting yourself a lot, because you know the alternative is worse. Sometimes you really, really, love the wrong person.
It sounds like you're trying to improve yourself, and that's good. I'll tell you something you won't want to hear, though: you not only probably can't unscrew this pooch, you shouldn't. You shouldn't even want to. This situation has been bad for everyone involved, and the best thing you can do is make any necessary apologies and give all of you time and space to heal. That will be a big, powerful first step on the road to self-improvement - a road that hopefully leads you away from shitty situations like this one.
Oh, and p.s.: AYR? Don't ever try to be a father figure to anyone you're dating (unless it's explicitly negotiated kink, of course, blah blah blah). Remember when I said "boundaries" earlier? You need to define your own role in a relationship, not just stumble into one because you're trying to be nice.
Oct 30, 2015
commented on I, Anonymous
Damn, either this thread is full of astroturfing, or else a bunch of y'all are assholes. Stop fucking whining about living wage laws, and pay the fuck attention when you're in a situation where someone is still not making a living wage. Preps and chefs may make the meals, but servers are the ones who catch all the shit, deserved or not, when a customer has a problem. They're the ones on the battlefront.
I'm all for eliminating tipping and making the minimum wage for servers the same as for everyone else, but that's not the case right now, so fucking tip, you stingy shitheads.
Aug 10, 2015
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The Drama Club
Damn, that is one unnecessarily long letter. It's okay to end bad relationships. It's not a failure if it's better for you. Just break up. Stop dithering.
Honestly if you ever write a letter to an advice columnist about your relationship and it requires more than a paragraph to ask your question, your shit is fucked and you're done. You answered your own question about a fifth of the way into your own sordid story, dude.
Aug 5, 2015
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Shitty GF #2
I just came in here to say what @2 said. "In fact, I fell in love with her the moment I set eyes on her." You're 36, man. Slow your roll a little. Get to know someone before you pledge them your heart forever.
Look, I'm comfortable predicting that until you learn how to date people without immediately staking the rest of your life's happiness on a successful relationship with them, you're going to continue to find yourself in these bad places. Dating isn't the process of finding one decent person amidst all the human trash heaps, it's the process of trying out decent people until you find one that you're actually compatible with. It takes more than a decent person to make a relationship work. Slow down. Love at first sight is for teenagers.
Aug 1, 2015
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: A Fully Weaponized Kink
Ugh, what a fucking trainwreck. Glad you're finally out of there, LW.
You made a few mistakes, but he was the bad one here. Don't get hung up on it or take the blame. Just work on moving on and do your best to keep this guy out of your life while still doing your best for your kids. I'm sorry you had to go through this, but you're going to be okay.
And if you fight for your kids, don't feel bad about that either. This guy clearly has no goddamn personal boundaries or respect.