Nov 13 slinky commented on Models to Feel Bad For.
Ricardo @42, isn't it nice to finally be able to say, "this is bullshit?"

Nov 13 slinky commented on Models to Feel Bad For.
"You are not under attack because people are pointing that ... bigger women are human beings deserving of as much love and respect as slim women."


I have to say, one of the nicest things about not being in my 20s anymore is that the straight men who are attracted to bigger women aren't so afraid of being judged that they'll pass me by, or worse treat me like a moped. The Fifi ad is everything you need for your insecure attracted-to-bigger-women-but-afraid-to-admit-it 19 year old guy demographic, which at the end of the day will sell a masturbation sleeve but doesn't actually help anybody.

Even more, the model is not unattractive. Posed badly in poor lighting, but posed badly in poor lighting does not an ugly person make.

Unfuck Fifi. (Fucking is fun and going by their behaviour they have not earned the delicious pleasure of a good satisfying fuck. Unfuck 'em.)
Oct 30 slinky commented on SL Letter of the Day: Mismatched.
Can an ace person know they're asexual without ever having had PIV sex?

Hands, fingers, mouths, and toys also are sex....and if she only wants somebody touching her that way once every 3 weeks, she doesn't need to have done PIV to know.
Oct 20 slinky commented on In the United States, Toddlers Shoot Someone About Once a Week.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again. If you actually gave a shit about the children, you'd focus on the eight greater causes as much as your gun fetish."

So, we make a HUGE effort to get kids vaccinated against preventable illnesses, including everything from polio to measles to flu.

We make a HUGE effort to get kids buckled safely in car seats, including some pretty big changes over the last decade (e.g. no kids in the front seat because airbags, proper seat fit, improvements on restraints, etc).

We've made big improvements in death due to SIDS, largely by a public health campaign to get parents to put babies to sleep on their backs.

We've made big public-health campaigns in the last decade to educate parents about shaken-baby syndrome and fetal alcohol syndrome, and have gotten health care workers to look for signs and to get help for families where one might be a problem (e.g. anger management, rehab).

We know that child abuse and neglect are major contributors to mortality, so we make schoolteachers and counsellors mandatory reporters. We also educate the public to the signs and have made resources available for families.

We know that accidental death from poisoning kills kids, so we have child-resistant pill containers, we can buy cabinet locks, and household chemicals come in child-resistant containers and have info on the back label on how to treat accidental ingestion. Also, the Poison Control Centers are a real thing.

Kids die of drowning, so doctors talk to parents about swimming pool safety, child water safety lessons are a thing, the CDC has a page about it, and lifeguards work at pools and beaches.

The world is not an either/or place. We can seriously discuss how to prevent the accidental death of children in car crashes, prevent accidental poisonings and drownings, make a serious and concerted effort to vaccinate children against serious illness, AND make a serious effort to reduce the incidence of child death and injury due to firearms. Having the conversation about gun safety and kids doesn't mean that's all we need to do (obviously not), and the fact that we're making serious efforts in other places doesn't mean that we don't have the time or resources to do so for firearm safety.
Oct 12 slinky commented on SHOCKER: The Northern Arizona University Shooter Is a Patriot and a Gun Nut.
I think that it would be GREAT for universities to regularly screen their students for mental health, as part of an annual or semi-annual student health checkup.

Mass shootings get the press, but the biggest number of gun deaths in the US each year are gun suicides....some 20,000 a year, or a number the size of the student body of Harvard University. (Think on THAT for a bit.)

The demographic group most likely to attempt gun suicide are young men between 17-23. Because they use an especially deadly method of attempting to kill themselves, they're more likely to die than women in the same age group. Young adults between 17 and 23 are also the group where a lot of serious psychiatric illnesses begin to show up, especially bipolar disorder and the schizophrenia family.

If we can screen them and TREAT THEM APPROPRIATELY, then maybe, just maybe, we can not have such an appallingly high suicide rate. Maybe we can find the ones who are developing or have developed serious mental illnesses and get them treated so that they're more likely to have good quality of life and the right kind of community care they need to manage their illnesses.

I get so upset listening to "but we have to deal with mental illness!" following a mass shooting, especially when it's used as a handwave of why we shouldn't take other evidence-based, well-tested steps to reduce gun violence (e.g. why is the ATF barred from keeping a central database on how many guns a given buyer purchases in a year, which is a major red flag for trafficking), but once you bring up trying to keep people from using guns to kill themselves, you get crickets.
Oct 8 slinky commented on Eleven-Year-Old Boy Shoots and Kills Eight-Year-Old Girl Because She Wouldn't Let Him See Her Puppy.

"He should be placed in a juvenile facility for a while, then released."

Maybe some time at juvie (the kid is 11....), but definitely placed with somebody other than his parents (grandparents or other relatives), with counselling, community support, and support for him and his caretakers.

It sounds like this kid is getting into some deeply ingrained patterns of behaviour. It's really, really hard to start changing those patterns. It's even more difficult to change those patterns of behaviour if the entire family isn't going to support the changes. Living with relatives who care for the kid but don't have those patterns of behaviour can be the push he'd need to get over that. The kid's parents could have supervised visitation and keep a relationship with their son while they all get counselling.

It's a lot of effort and the family may not be willing. When everybody signs on board, though, this does work and tends to work well.
Oct 8 slinky commented on Eleven-Year-Old Boy Shoots and Kills Eight-Year-Old Girl Because She Wouldn't Let Him See Her Puppy.
If the boy had both parents living in the house, they should both be charged with criminal negligence and child neglect. The weapon might have belonged to the father, but if both parents live there, both parents are responsible.

And yes, weregild to the girl's family. At the very least, the boy's parents need to be on the hook for funeral expenses. It won't make things better and it won't bring their little girl back, but it's one less insult to the horrific injury they're already facing.
Sep 19 slinky commented on SL Letter of the Day: Gender-Neutral in a Dress.
@24, that's a quote from The Silence of the Lambs.
Aug 23 slinky commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Flirtation, Innocent and Otherwise.
LW has a pretty iron-clad way to knock this particular flirtation on the head without directly addressing the jealousy issue, and that's to focus on the inappropriateness of talking like this to a 22-year-old coworker.

As undead ayn rand put it....this is a sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen. She can put it in those terms, and in the terms of, you are putting all of our ability to live indoors and eat hot food in danger, so knock it the fuck off RIGHT NOW.

And then--if he knocks it off and it stays knocked off, no problem. If he starts trying to rules-lawyer his way into something else, then LW has evidence of a pattern.
Aug 23 slinky commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Flirtation, Innocent and Otherwise.
@36 -- "Uh, because he's working his way into grooming the woman for cheating, and because he has an inappropriate way of entangling with women in a monogamous relationship he agreed to the terms for?"


He's sending sexually explicit texts to a 22-year-old COWORKER.

First off, wow, inappropriate much? My coworkers and I will talk about sex on the job, we're a raunchy bunch, but we don't text each other about it outside work.

Second, she's 22. Up until this point in her life, it is highly unlikely that she's ever met that particular type of married man who befriends you, and then starts opening up about his married life, and then tells you how his wife just doesn't treat him right, and finally, after you're set up to be his go-to girl for emotional comfort, propositions you for sex. Oh, and when you shoot him down, he starts to whine about leading him on. The fact that he's now gotten to describing particular sex acts he likes to do (and asking for a friend? really?) supports this. He's not sending texts like this to a 22-year-old male coworker, and he's not sending them to a 55-year-old female coworker. He's sending them to a younger woman who he would presumably like to bang.

And note that 22-year-old coworker shot him down right quick: "Gross." She might not recognise him for trying to groom her into the kind of power balance relationship that leads to extramarital fucking, but she did recognise that he was obliquely putting sex on the table and shut that shit down.

Regardless of how jealous or not the OP is, she's right to smell a rat here.