Mar 1, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: A Ring On It
I don't get piercings. Tatoos I understand; they're cool-looking, or at least the well-drawn ones are, and there's no other way to adorn your body with a long-lasting work of art. But if you want to suspend jewelry from your body, there's already the option of necklaces, bracelets, anklets, rings, waist-chains - hell, you could encrust or put charms on a cock ring. Why put a hole in your body? To prove how committed you are to some kind of fashion?
I just don't get it.
Feb 24, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: A Dog's Life
On the fake-versus-bullshit thing: either the whole letter is fake, or something serious happened to this guy. The letter makes it clear that there's ample evidence that he's withdrawn from work, friends, and life in general.
Personally, real or not, I think this letter is a good test case scenario of when 'kink' goes over the line into 'mental illness'.
Feb 16, 2016
commented on Did You Leave Your Breakfast Biscuit on the #10 Bus This Morning
Perhaps not exactly on topic, but I've always wondered if when Dan says he doesn't drive - does that mean he doesn't own a car and prefers to let others (like Terry) drive, or does that mean he never got a license? I never understood not getting a license if you're physically able to drive - it seems like it could be useful in an emergency at least. I know a woman who did that - refused to get a license or even informally learn how to drive, and it drove me nuts a couple of times because we were temporarily in a kind of business arrangement together and her being able to drive would have come in pretty handy.
Anyway, just wondering.
Feb 11, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Using "Crazy" Like That Is So Gay, Dan, Really Lame
Although I think the LW is being sincere, and means well, s/he is just wrong. Dan's use of the word - and anyone's use of it in similar contexts - is perfectly acceptable. An accusation or judgement that someone is "crazy" occurs when there is no clear explanation for their irrational, difficult behavior. There is, by definition, no way to use a more precise label. And to substitute a label such as "irrational" or "disproportionate" or "unjustified", etc., moves one's discursive register into a kind of bloodless Mr. Spock-like realm that would interfere with the attempt to be informal and down-to-earth.
You could make the argument that the same could be said of offensive racial or ethnic epithets, for example - or even the word "retarded". But that would be wrong: those epithets are meant to denigrate people for who they are. "Crazy," at least when Dan uses it, describes crazy behavior by people who presumably do not have a serious mental illness. Crazy is as crazy does - and we all act crazy sometimes.
Feb 10, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: He Doesn't Wanna Be Her Next Cuckold
@darkhorse, nocute - I've never been with a squirter, but I'm sure it wouldn't bother me at all, aside from the inconvenience of washing sheets, etc. Hard to imagine any man would really be bothered by irrefutable proof that he succeeded in bringing his partner to orgasm! But I suppose some guys are finicky.
Feb 9, 2016
commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: She Knows She's Bi Now—But Does Anyone Else Need To Know?
On another note, although I don't think it's that big a deal for a woman to declare her bisexuality, as I said, I question the circumstances that would make 'coming out' seem natural or necessary here. People have already taken Dan to task for the unlikeliness of his hypothetical scenario - 'just us straight gals', etc., but this raises the larger question - when exactly would her "coming out" not seem forced or inappropriate?
Think about it: she's a straight-identified married woman, and her relationship with her FWB is, by her own description, comfortable and affectionate, but still essentially sexual and not romantic. So how is talking about it not simply discussing her sex life?
If she were bisexual to the degree that she could potentially fall in love with and marry a woman - if she were "bi-romantic", as it were, that might be one thing. But she's not. I think she's obligated to stand up for bisexual rights, and defend bisexuality if someone is slagging on it, but I honestly don't see the obligation to 'out' herself as bisexual if she doesn't want to. 'Bisexual erasure' or not, I don't think that anyone in her position should feel compelled to either stay in or leave the 'bisexual closet', just make the choice that feels best to them.
Feb 3, 2016
commented on Today In Presidential Hopefuling
I honestly am starting to feel bad for Jeb! You can make fun of him for being a silver-spoon entitled preppie all you want - and certainly, those characterizations are accurate enough - but no one likes to screw up something they were once confident they could do. It's gonna take him years to recover from this, like it did for Al Gore.
At least he seems like a human being, unlike lizard-alien Christbot Cruz.