Nov 30 DRF commented on Savage Love.
Could FTWTF's boyfriend have a rash or uncomfortable undergarments? Perhaps a trip to the doctor would sort this out. Better do it before they repeal Obamacare!
Nov 22 DRF commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Dear Old—Really Old—Mom and Dad.
Another great answer. "Let's not talk about politics, religion or sex in situations in which people cannot easily get up and walk away" used to be standard etiquette.

People are allowed to love their parents, their friends, their spouses even if those people did something bad. They're allowed to think that the bad thing is no big deal, even if it affects a whole lot of other people. They're allowed to think it is a big deal and be angry and happy and disappointed and admiring all at the same time.
Nov 16 DRF commented on Savage Love.
KHH should marry his boyfriend and feel no guilt about the timing. Countless straight couples have gotten married earlier than they would have due to a surprise event (usually a pregnancy but legal issues too), and many of them have stayed married.

So get married, and if anyone asks say "We were worried Trump would repeal gay marriage." It is true. If it doesn't work out, get a divorce after your BF has his green card in hand and part ways knowing you both did the right thing.
May 23 DRF commented on Your Donald Trump Reader.
@18 Al Gore lost for several reasons, but the margin was so small, that if any one of them had been removed, the butterfly ballot or claiming to have served in Vietnam or inventing the Internet, he'd have won.
May 23 DRF commented on Your Donald Trump Reader.
What I like in this post is that Mr. Savage distinguishes between Donald Trump and normal Republicans (even what's been normal post-Bush). I have friends who are Rep and conservative and they deserved better than this.

What they should take away? "Trump will owe the party nothing." That's key. The conventional Republicans are rallying because they're hoping to buy some voice in any future administration, and they're not going to get one.
May 18 DRF commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: How Can I Be a Good Ally to My Abusive Trans Ex?.
I ordinarily use the most recent expressed pronoun even when referring to events that took place before the person's transition, but if LW is at, say, a support group and talking about her experiences, then the fact that M is trans is an afterthought. She should go ahead and say "she" and explain that M was a then-pre-transition trans man if it is ever relevant.
May 3 DRF commented on Savage Love.
Fichu and Philiphile both offered good advice, I think. Some middle ground would probably leave WWWM better off. Probably her dates too.
May 3 DRF commented on Savage Love.
Been thinking about WWWM. Maybe she'd do well in a situation in which she could get to know guys for long periods outside of a romantic relationship before suggesting they enter one (meet guys at a volunteer organization or join some kind of athletic group that's mostly guys), but that makes me wonder about a female version of Nice Guy syndrome. She'd basically be pretending to be just a friend (or actually being a friend and pretending not to be anything else) while surreptitiously evaluating guys for Mr. Right-ness.

Thoughts on whether it'd work? Thoughts on the ethics of it?
May 3 DRF commented on Savage Love.
@6 EricaP, yeah serial killers, but maybe trust that he's being sincere, that not going to run around and tell all her friends and coworkers what a big slut she was or maybe trust that he's not just pretending to be nice to her so he can sleep with her and planning to drop her like a hot potato right after. Maybe she had a friend in high school or college who had a guy pull one of those; plenty of women do.
May 3 DRF commented on Savage Love.
I don't think Mr. Savage's advice to the first LW is that great. She said flat-out that she's invested in holding off on sex until she finds someone she likes and--this may have been buried--knows she can trust. Trust might be the most important issue. Jumping into something that diametrically opposed to her current strategy and values, sex with strangers, isn't likely to be something that this particular virgin will be willing to try. What EricaP recommends is more likely to be this LW's speed, activity-wise, maybe not oral but something more than kissing, but the real problem is one of two things:

Either this LW has a social or psychological issue that makes it hard for her to connect with people emotionally, and that's why the guys are leaving, or she's only dating guys who expect to have sex shortly, who interpret "she hasn't had sex with me in two weeks" as "she doesn't like me" or just don't feel like waiting for sex.

Problem #1 isn't going to be solved here. Problem #2: Meet guys from outside the hookup culture. Are you picking them all up at clubs? Stop. Are you picking them all up at the same website? Stop.
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