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Hunter78 is unwinding from work.
5:45 AM Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
Venn must be in heaven-- an entire column devoted exclusively to gays (or is that male SSers?).
5:43 AM Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
People into being humiliated, and the people who love them.
4:44 AM Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
Your partner enjoys having other men spit in his face? How attractive!
6:46 AM yesterday Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
Review addendum--

I haven't previously added addendums to the Review (beyond a few acknowledgments like "Yeah, the LW could be a guy"), but this week I had a major omission-- POT. This topic-- springing from Dan's recommendation to 2 LWs-- prompted a good number of comments, for and against. My own experience-- yes, it makes sex much better. No, I don't addict-- even when I've been using long term, and then I'm out, there's no physical withdrawal-- just an occasional "Gee, I wish I had some" feeling. Nothing, nothing like tobacco. When using, I definitely feel more creative and get new ideas, but I do get physically lazier and accomplish less. Stoner syndrome?
Dec 5 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
The Week in Review -- Quickies
7 Letters, good response by recent standards.

Fwtf-- Person is dissatisfied with their bf of 2y who often "fiddles" with his penis in front of them and others. He claims the right to fiddle anywhere in the house-- they don't like it. Is this behavior unacceptable, or are they being unreasonable?

Blows-- Het married male. Recently he told her he wanted more bjs. They made a deal-- he would shower daily, and she would suck his cock 2x month. He's showered for a month, but got no head. Should he bring it up?

Cap-- Mid 30s bi woman in incredible poly marriage w bi guy. She has heard that an outside friend has a crush of her (and she has been crushing on him). He'd have to ask his partners about her to proceed, but, after three months, he still hasn't talked to them about her. Her pride prevents her from asking him how he feels about her. Should she move on?

CantCome-- Mid 20s queer trans woman in 3 month mono relationship w queer cis woman. Great relationship-- except gf has never come. Recently she's having a "sexual awakening". She's been feeling dysphoric when Cant plays with her. They've discussed this, but they feel lost. What can they do?

Gdh-- Probable guy in ltr with a woman he's going to marry. The only way gf can come is by grinding on his boxers. Is there a toy or something that can help?

Spar-- Small-built nonparous woman has bf keeps tell her to squeeze her pussy while they're fucking. Ditto while they're doing anal. No one else has complained. What to do?

Dana-- Reader writes in to thank Dan for his recent column concerning a person mistaken on Tinder for their twin. Dana has a friend who has experienced similar.

The letters were interesting this week. What is dick-fiddling? Actual waving the staff? Is it alright if he owns the house? The horror of not showering every day. In 19c America the Saturday night was reality, not a joke-- and the whole family used the same bath water. And is cock-sucking a sure route to orgasm? Cap, our poly woman pining for another man, was subpar. Is her transness part of Cant's problem-- or her gf's? Practical advice for Gdh's non-penetrative coming. Spar taught us some of our commenters have quite athletic pussies. Dana generated evil twin mirth. Griz won the LMB.
Dec 4 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
I believe I've experienced the female orgasmic "squeezings" mentioned above. Definitely not a heavy pressure, just a sort of gentle suckling on my glans and maybe foreskin. Definitely not all women, and not my partner, who rarely comes from piv.

I've never "studied" this, which is why I'm so tentative. But it felt sweet.
Dec 2 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.

Giving head

To expand my "going up" method-- we are lying side-by-side, facing each other, fondling. Let's say I'm to her left. I move up and partially rise. My weight is supported on the shin and knee of my right leg. I cast my left leg over her and plant my left foot on the bed between her right shoulder and head. I typically grab the headboard for stability. She remains lying down but rotated to a standard supine position, her head still on the pillow. My crotch is in front of her face, and I introduce the glans into her mouth. She can control the depth of penetration by adjusting her head on the pillow or bunching it up. She is perfectly comfortable. I take care not to buck (which would be a natural reaction), but I feel free to swirl it around.

I'm confused when you, CMD, and others refer to the "tip" of the penis. To me, the tip refers to the urethral opening and the area immediately around it-- ie, the area that that would bump in the wall, if a fully erect man were to walk into it. I suspect at least some of you actually mean the glans (from the Lat for "acorn") or head of the penis.

The demeaning or submissive aspect of "going down" on a guy by is illustrated by this archtypical scenario: the couple is standing together, fondling. Then she drops down to her knees, opening his fly if he's dressed, and starts sucking the love-stalk. This she-kneeling position is iconic for fellatio. (Didn't Donald I remark that one of his female apprentices would look even better on her knees?) Of course, a woman (I'm gendering the fellator here for simple clarity) can go down on a guy in bed, but there's still a submissive aspect here, as she is "servicing" him.

I'm not clear about your easiest technique-- with him on his knees. Where is your body?

Dec 1 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
They are called blowJOBS for a reason.

To quote an old punchline: "If you're blowing, you're doing it wrong."

I don't really understand the sudden aversion the women here have expressed to the term, when they cheerfully used it for like 90 msgs. Personally my preference has always been cock-sucking-- for the reason mentioned above.

Another interesting term is "going down on" someone-- Em particularly likes this usage. I feel it only describes a subset of oral sex. I have rarely had a woman go down me-- what I typically do is go up on her (we're lying down) and present my dick to her face. Usually (even on a first date) she gladly accepts it (thank you, Sexual Revolution) into her mouth. My long term partner is a happy cock-sucker, but she doesn't like to go down on me-- she considers that demeaning. Yes, I expect many other women find that aspect attractive.

And for the record (Bi's straw poll), I very rarely come from oral. Oral is just a wonderful exercise in the game of sex.

Dec 1 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
Concerning Spar's small build, I offer this bit of male folklore I've heard, for readers' amusement and without comment on its accuracy:

Skinny women are too loose. Big women have all that fat putting extra pressure on your dick.
Nov 30 Hunter78 commented on Savage Love.
Three cheers to all those insisting the trans/cis statuses of CantCome and her gf have no importance whatsoever to their issue. However, the matter is not so clear to me, nor, more importantly, to CantCome herself. Why does she mention their statuses in her 1st sentence, if it's not important? Anorgasmia is not particularly rare among cis women-- does Cant not know that? Then there's gf's recent "sexual awakening", which, however, is coupled with "disphoria". There seems to be more going on here than standard anorgasmia.