Corylea
Boston area, USA
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Bio

Middle-aged bisexual woman. Licensed psychologist, gamer, modder, fanfic author

Feb 3 Corylea commented on Two Magazine Covers.
Wow. That New Yorker cover says SO much in one very simple image. That's really powerful. Good job, whoever thought up that one!
Feb 1 Corylea commented on Savage Love.
WAD, the "I want a man to grab me" part of your letter suggests to me that you want a more aggressive or dominant style than you're currently getting with your girlfriend. At two months into a relationship, the two of you are still figuring out what works together, and if you want a more aggressive style, you can ask for it, and she how she handles it.

Also, do you actually want a dick, or do you just want to be fucked? If it's the latter, you can ask your girlfriend to wear a strap-on, or you can ask her to fist you. Strap-ons never come just as you're getting into it, and fists don't generally feel as if you're not full enough. You may find that fists and/or strap-ons beat bio dicks anytime. :-)
Jan 11 Corylea commented on Savage Love.
I found the question from FAGS especially amusing in light of the fact that readers were encouraged to write to "Hey, Faggot" in the early days of Dan's column. :-)
Dec 23, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: New To America & Ready To Get Laid.
Given that you have so little experience interacting with women, I think it would be a great idea for you to get experience interacting with women when sex is NOT on the table. Take a class or join a club about a topic that interests you, and talk to the women in the class or club just as PEOPLE.

Once you have more experience interacting with women, once you see them as fellow human beings and not as something strange or mysterious, the whole dating thing will go a LOT better. Plus you might make some friends along the way, and who can't use a friend?

Take a class in a useful skill -- like cooking -- or in a sport you're interested in -- like tennis, or in a hobby that calls to you -- like drawing or pottery or music. Not only will you learn something that's either fun or useful -- possibly both -- but you'll have something to talk about on your dates.

Every club I've ever been involved with has needed more people to do the actual work of the club and not just attend events. Volunteer to set up chairs or serve food or do whatever it is that your club does, and not only will you get to know the other active, involved people who also volunteer, you'll develop a reputation as a good and useful person. Plus, it will give you more things to talk about on dates.

Take enough classes and join enough clubs, and you may not need a dating app at all, because you may be meeting lots of people who like what you like and who've gotten to know you in a more natural way. (I'm not dissing dating apps; it's just that no one I know really enjoys meeting people through them, whereas everyone I know has enjoyed meeting like-minded people in classes and clubs.)
More...
Dec 7, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love.
@12 -- I agree. I think LW1 needs to see a therapist to process the experience, to understand how and why he allowed someone to do that to him, and to learn to set boundaries so it doesn't happen again.
Nov 24, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Let's Give Thanks for Threesomes!.
Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy wrote a book with the name "The Ethical Slut," and it was a great book. But Dan, but you're probably the one who's done the most to show the world how to be sex-positive in an ethical way. Yes, your ethics DO come through, and I wouldn't read you -- or admire you the way I do -- if they weren't there. So thanks for that.

Nov 24, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Birth Control Pen Pals.
How disheartening that America has become the kind of nation that must be rescued by the international community, but how encouraging that the international community has not abandoned us.

*sigh*
Nov 18, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Help! I'm Being Sext-Shamed By My Asexual Ex!.
SSRI's have sexual side effects for large numbers of people, but they aren't the only anti-depressants out there. Welbutrin rarely has sexual side effects, and in fact it sometimes manages to counteract the sexual side effects of other anti-depressants.

So please talk to your doctor about the side effects you're experiencing and ask him or her to work with you to find a drug -- or combination of drugs -- that improves your depression without taking away your sex drive.
Nov 17, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The Loneliest Flip-Flopper In Seattle.
Did San Francisco fall into the Pacific ocean when I wasn't looking?
Nov 15, 2016 Corylea commented on Savage Love.
"Freedom and decency need to lawyer the fuck up."

Well said, Dan! Please keep the light of your sassy humor burning, now more than ever.