commented on SL Letter of the Day: Smallsville
I'm going to admit that size is, at least a bit, important. I'm not a size queen by any means. I've been with guys that were on the smaller side of average. And I've had a wonderful time. However, PIV was a bit lacking. It might not make me popular to admit that I prefer bigger than average, but since I can come from vaginal penetration and I ENJOY having my cervix bumped sometimes, size is a plus. And yes, I know, fingers/toys, etc. But they just don't hit the same way.
I wouldn't miss out on someone awesome for it, but I'd certainly hope he wasn't opposed to strap-ons occasionally.
updated his or her location.
answered a bunch of weird questions about himself or herself.
commented on SLLOTD: Fully-Clothed Fantasy
I think sissoucat has it @26 when she says "Perhaps because, as a female, I don't pick the male signals of faking it ? " vs those that think gay porn is much more enthusiastic and people are enjoying themselves more. Many of the men in gay porn are heterosexual, and take viagra to get/stay hard.
commented on The Experiences of a 17-Year-Old Feminist
I had to stop reading about halfway through, so on the off chance that I'm reiterating something that someone said, I apologize.
As a woman, I have witnessed other women cat-calling men. Regularly. No, that does not negate how horrible it is when a man does it to a woman. Women do still have a long way to go with being considered "equal", and it's because of this that people are willing to dismiss the behavior when it's instigated by a woman because of the history of oppression. If a woman sexually harasses a man, and other's dismiss it because she's a woman, isn't that really just another form of oppression? "Oh, it's ok, she's just a woman. She can't really cause any harm. And, besides, she's probably had it happen to her hundreds of times."
Part of the reason we haven't been able to get to a point of equality is because there are always people that want special privileges to make up for their oppression for awhile before the actual equality sets in.
It's horrible when anyone violates anyone. Period. When someone makes sexual comments at someone else, it either is, or can at least feel like, a threat of violence.
commented on Savage Love
@20 I see what you did there. Cute. :)
But to answer your question: Yes, ageism IS a thing. To dismiss someone's feelings because they haven't had the benefit of experience is unfair. Yes, I know more at 30 than I did at 20. And I'm sure I'll know more at 40 than I do now. But, that doesn't mean that my feelings are invalid and I should be told to "grow up". Or worse, when people say, "You'll be laughing at how silly you're being over this in a few years."
Several years ago, one of my best friends at the time had a daughter that was around 7 (give or take a year). We were all camping together, and I was getting over a breakup that hurt a lot. The little girl was trying to commiserate by telling me about the boy she loved, and got very sad because they couldn't be together. Because she was also asking me questions about "the birds and the bees" I asked her mother how she wanted me to handle it, or if she wanted me to send her to her parents for those questions. After telling me I could answer any questions I was comfortable with, the only thing she asked of me was that I not dismiss her daughters feelings. While it might not be the "love" that we've experienced as adults, it is the realest thing she had experienced to date, and that made it valid.
While I had no intention of dismissing how she felt, that request stuck with me. To tell someone they still have growing to do (which is true for anyone at any age as long as they aren't dying today) is invalidating how they feel now and is exceptionally unfair.