Jun 5
KateRose commented on Savage Love.
@48, EricaP.
Nope, definitely doesn't make a difference to her situation. More just a musing of my own. It made sense in my head, and I wondered if it would make sense once I typed it out. :)
Nope, definitely doesn't make a difference to her situation. More just a musing of my own. It made sense in my head, and I wondered if it would make sense once I typed it out. :)
Jun 5
KateRose commented on Savage Love.
If EFFED's husband continues, she says she's going to leave. I've wondered if, for some men into being cuckolded, the threat of being left does something for them. If she leaves, and ends up with someone else, would that be like the ultimate cuckolding experience?
Obviously that wouldn't work for all people into that, but it's certainly a theory as to why he would continue refusing to consider her feelings...
Obviously that wouldn't work for all people into that, but it's certainly a theory as to why he would continue refusing to consider her feelings...
May 15
KateRose commented on Savage Love.
@27, I must have missed the definition of "pillow princess" in a previous thread... Can't say I'm thrilled with the term, but it's good to know there are enough of us to come up with one. I never quite know how to explain it on the rare occasions it comes up. I think women are beautiful, I can be turned on by women, but I have almost zero interest in any vagina that isn't mine (I say almost because I'm sure there's gotta be one or two exceptions). I've made out with other girls, and let them do things to me, but I would never think to lead them on that I wanted to do anything back.
May 14
KateRose commented on SL Letter of the Day: Mind Control.
I came across stories about mind control when I was in my teens, and I still check out the site every so often to see if anything new has cropped up. I get why it would be hot to imagine it from either side (though, I prefer to imagine being controlled...) It's the one thing that I've never really gotten to explore with anyone. Waiting for the right guy, I suppose.
I don't see why people are so ready to beat themselves up over their fantasies, especially when they have no intention of acting on them in a realistic way (playing with a consenting partner is a different story).
I don't see why people are so ready to beat themselves up over their fantasies, especially when they have no intention of acting on them in a realistic way (playing with a consenting partner is a different story).
Apr 29
KateRose commented on SL Letter of the Day: Not One of Those Bisexuals.
@41, the LW didn't say that everyone at her school was bisexual, but that everyone knew SHE was bisexual because of her actions.
Apr 25
KateRose commented on Savage Love.
@59
Not necessarily. Yes I would have been mortified to walk in on my parents having sex, but little comments and conversations growing up are a good thing. I don't think kids should get details, but if parents are open from the beginning that they are still sexual beings it is beneficial. As a teenager, I knew my parents were still having sex (I came across various types of evidence), and sure, there was a bit of an ick factor, but I would be far more concerned if they weren't.
I will say, on the other hand, my father and I have a running bit where he'll occasionally throw out a bit too much detail to try to weird me out, which is usually followed by me saying, "You start giving details, I start giving details." So it shouldn't necessarily be advertised, but it also shoudn't be hidden.
Not necessarily. Yes I would have been mortified to walk in on my parents having sex, but little comments and conversations growing up are a good thing. I don't think kids should get details, but if parents are open from the beginning that they are still sexual beings it is beneficial. As a teenager, I knew my parents were still having sex (I came across various types of evidence), and sure, there was a bit of an ick factor, but I would be far more concerned if they weren't.
I will say, on the other hand, my father and I have a running bit where he'll occasionally throw out a bit too much detail to try to weird me out, which is usually followed by me saying, "You start giving details, I start giving details." So it shouldn't necessarily be advertised, but it also shoudn't be hidden.
Mar 28
KateRose commented on Savage Love.
@73 SIS stated in her letter that her brother has ASKED to be taken to a prostitute. While it's unlikely to actually fix anything, it's unfair to assume that he would be humiliated or shamed by it. Some people would, sure, but not everyone considers visiting a prostitute shameful.
Mar 13
KateRose commented on The New Pope Is a Bigot Just Like the Last Pope.
What Proteus said @29...
Not that I wouldn't be thrilled for the Catholic church to actually get with the times, but I would have been surprised if he WASN'T against abortion, birth control, and gay marriage.
Not that I wouldn't be thrilled for the Catholic church to actually get with the times, but I would have been surprised if he WASN'T against abortion, birth control, and gay marriage.
Mar 7
KateRose commented on SL Letter of the Day: The Big Finish.
As someone who used to be completely unable to orgasm if there was another person involved, I know exactly how someone pressuring you to get off just makes it more frustrating. (FYI, if you repeat the phrase, "Are you gonna come?" over and over again, the answer is most definitely "No.")
I also know how a partner that concentrates on your pleasure instead of your orgasm can take that pressure off and allow you to relax enough to get there.
But I get how the LW feels to an extent too. An ex had an inability to get off due to a medication he was taking, and, while I logically understood that, I felt bad. I knew he wanted to be getting off. I didn't pressure him, and it wasn't so much a blow to the ego(though I'm sure that was in there somewhere subconciously) as it was difficult for me because I enjoy my partners pleasure and knew that he wanted to get there and couldn't.
That said, I do think she needs to let it go. If he's been this way his whole life it's how he's wired. He's obviously cool with it and it's not a reflection on her.
I also know how a partner that concentrates on your pleasure instead of your orgasm can take that pressure off and allow you to relax enough to get there.
But I get how the LW feels to an extent too. An ex had an inability to get off due to a medication he was taking, and, while I logically understood that, I felt bad. I knew he wanted to be getting off. I didn't pressure him, and it wasn't so much a blow to the ego(though I'm sure that was in there somewhere subconciously) as it was difficult for me because I enjoy my partners pleasure and knew that he wanted to get there and couldn't.
That said, I do think she needs to let it go. If he's been this way his whole life it's how he's wired. He's obviously cool with it and it's not a reflection on her.
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Unfortunately, as I'm sure you're aware (particularly after your ready use of PDY for this couple)spiting him will not necessarily make her happy. If she does not want to leave him, she would be best not making the threat, but to just state matter of factly what she will and will not do anymore.
On the other hand, if she feels leaving is her only option, it's worth giving him "what he wants" if it also makes her happier in the end.