Day after day, week after week, month after month, you sit there in the library clicking that same mouse as hard as you can while going through your useless, spam-filled e-mail. Printing out useless garbage in an attempt to give your worthless life meaning. Now just the sight of you drives my mind into fantasies of the most explicit murder scenes, involving the removal of your clicking finger and jamming it in your ear until it scrapes whatever is left of your worthless brain. How hard do you have to click that mouse? How hard? Do you think the harder you click, the more powerful the spam deletion? So stop it, just fucking stop it.

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