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Thursday, December 22, 2011

Top Four Ways to Get Kicked Off Your Southwest Flight Home

Posted by on Thu, Dec 22, 2011 at 2:17 PM

A lot of people are about to fly home for Christmas in the next few days, and some of you are probably gonna be flying out on Southwest Air because it's so cheap.... it's like the bargain bin of the skies! Unfortunately they appear to have developed a questionable policy of removing people from their flights before takeoff....Here are a few super sketchy things to avoid if you wanna stay on that flight home:

Clyde Peterson and Karl Blau: Terrorists of Stink
  • Karl Blau and Clyde Peterson: Terrorists of Stink

1.) Being Gay: "Uh Huh Her" Frontwoman/ L Word star Leisha Hailey got escorted off her flight in Texas last September for kissing her girlfriend. Hailey stated that it was a modest kiss, but when the flight attendant told her that other passenger's had complained and that they were disturbing the family friendly environment, an argument escalated until the couple was removed.

2.) Being Fat: Actor Kevin Smith was removed from an Oakland flight last year for infringing on portion of another seat. Smith promptly went crazy on SW via his twitter, and the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance called for a Southwest boycott, suggesting that "people of size to seek out and travel airlines that do not have such discriminatory policies."

3.) Having Saggy Pants: Over Labor Day weekend this year, Billie Joe Armstrong of Green Day was kicked off his SW flight for sagging his pants and refusing to pull them up. He also went crazy on twitter as soon as it happened, stating "Just got kicked off a southwest flight because my pants sagged too low! What the fuck? No joke!" (The thing that confuses me the most about this one is, why is Billie Joe taking a SW flight? SW doesn't even have first class and wouldn't even be able to check his giant heavy bags of Green Day money for free.)

4.) Being Smelly: NW favorites Karl Blau and Clyde Peterson were coming back from playing on a Laura Veirs/Yr Heart Breaks tour a few years ago and a passenger complaint about them being smelly got them on the brink of being removed from their flight. Before he was escorted off, a panicked Karl Blau stood up and made an announcement that he was flying home in between tours for his wedding, and pleaded for help from the other passengers. Someone gave him a clean shirt and he was permitted to stay on board and was able to make it to his wedding in time. Later in the flight, it was determined that the entire plane was full of Seattle Sounders players and the smell was not even coming from them.


Comments (14) RSS

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metardtard 1
"(The thing that confuses me the most about this one is, why is Billie Joe taking a SW flight? SW doesn't even have first class and wouldn't even be able to check his giant heavy bags of Green Day money for free.)"

Well played!
Posted by metardtard on December 22, 2011 at 3:05 PM · Report this
Kinison 2
I think some of these arnt really reasons that will get you kicked off the plane, but deciding to "Keep it Real" by amping a complaint into a full blown argumnet.
Posted by Kinison on December 22, 2011 at 3:07 PM · Report this
I think commenter 2 is correct here - it's often more how people will deal with a complaint than the actual thing they were doing in the first place. I've actually usually seen SW flight attendants be OVERLY nice to people who are doing ridiculous things (i.e. a five minute argument with a man who wanted them to let him out onto the tarmac so he could smoke when our flight was delayed! And he didn't get kicked off, although it was threatened!)

However - so not cool with the kissing, that's something people should have the right to 'escalate' over because it's a ridiculous policy!

With 'being fat' - well, most airlines have this policy now, honestly. If the flight isn't full, they won't charge you for two seats, but if it is a full flight and you need two seats, they will - which seems fair enough, honestly. For example, you can choose to bring a young kid on a plane and have him/her sit in your lap for free, but you have to pay if you want an extra seat. You are paying by the seat, not by the person, and the airline would have to bump someone else off a full flight to accommodate someone who needs two seats.
Posted by sara on December 22, 2011 at 3:29 PM · Report this
@2 and 3, I think you're right about the escalation thing but it goes both ways. People in positions of authority, no matter how trivial, often become increasingly rigid when that authority is challenged, especially if it is done in front of others. And as bad as the kissing story is, I'm actually more concerned that I could get kicked off because my pants ride low sometimes!!
Posted by DannyG on December 22, 2011 at 3:47 PM · Report this
crap bag 5
What does this have to do with music/nightlife?
Posted by crap bag on December 22, 2011 at 3:51 PM · Report this
Didn't you get the memo? SWA is now your mother. Now sit up straight or you don't get any peanuts.
Posted by Anastasia Beaverhausen on December 22, 2011 at 3:54 PM · Report this
I was on a job assignment on a mountain when my cell phone rang to tell me I had to be on the next flight or be stuck for four days. I had barely enough time to get to the airport so I wound up checking in minutes before boarding really sweaty, covered in dust, dirt, and sunscreen, while smelling so bad that I offended myself. What did the airline do? Comped me up to first class.

Flying just flat out sucks these days. As someone who used to fly all over the place every week back in the 90's, there is nothing I dread more than flying anywhere even once a year now. I used to love it. It seems that everyone now has had their pay cut so deep that morale is at an all time low. Nobody has the authority to do anything anymore. Pre 9/11 you could ask nicely and they'd bend whatever rule was in the way of you getting where you wanted to go with a smile on your face. Not that it was perfect every time or babies didn't cry on planes, but the stuff that people could fix would get fixed. Now it's just a shrug and a "sorry, I can't do anything for you". It's like we're not on the same team anymore.
Posted by SPG on December 22, 2011 at 3:56 PM · Report this
Grant Brissey, Emeritus 8
@ crap bag: Three of the four stories are about musicians. Also, we do what we want.
Posted by Grant Brissey, Emeritus on December 22, 2011 at 4:00 PM · Report this
Flying Southwest from now on
Posted by Reader01 on December 22, 2011 at 5:46 PM · Report this
aardvark 10
@7 indeed. its sit down shut up pull your pants down do what you're told now. it's still amazing we can sit in an aluminum tube and zip around relatively fast though. but the fun days of yor are gone.

and people too fat to fit in their seat? fuck you. buy two seats show some respect to the people around you that dont want to be pressed against your fat for 4 hours.
Posted by aardvark on December 22, 2011 at 7:51 PM · Report this
in-frequent 11
In Kevin smiths defene didn't he buy two seats? Then he got bumped to another flight where the two seats weren't next to each other? I think I got worse from there ... Nut the airline apologized to him. Or said they would.
Posted by in-frequent on December 22, 2011 at 8:54 PM · Report this
in-frequent 12
And getting kicked off because you stink only to find the smell was someone else... That ought to be worth a few comped flights at least.
Posted by in-frequent on December 22, 2011 at 10:36 PM · Report this
Fnarf 13
There's no excuse for being overly smelly on a plane. You can wash your pits in the airplane lav in a pinch, and if you use deodorant you really shouldn't have to. I'm less thrilled with the "fat", "kissing", "saggy" cases, but I have to say, the fact is, it's a bus -- everyone is trying to get to the same place at the same time in difficult circumstances, and it's really very rude to make a spectacle of yourself when there are people around you who somehow manage not to. Notice that it's always well-off white dudes who are causing problems; you never hear about elderly Hispanic ladies making a stink (so to speak). "Sit down, shut up, be still" is actually pretty solid advice, rock star. Oh, and shut off your fucking phone when they tell you.
Posted by Fnarf on December 22, 2011 at 10:42 PM · Report this
LEE. 14
At the risk of stating the obvious, you shouldn't have to justify anything to a person named Crapbag, Grant.
Posted by LEE. on December 23, 2011 at 12:51 PM · Report this

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