Music
Dec 22, 2005 at 4:00 am
It Would Be Nice If for Once This Jew Could Walk into a Store and Not Be Whacked with Giant Candy Canes by Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
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800 Maynard Ave S, Suite 200, Seattle, WA 98134
800 Maynard Ave S, Suite 200, Seattle, WA 98134
Learn some fucking tolerance(joke drunk sarcasm).
And, Dear Dr. Phil Me: Fine, listen to all the Xmas music you want -- at home or at friends houses. Just don't put it in public places, so that it can annoy me and millions of other people. (I don't mind seeing Santa Claus. I just don't want to hear him.)
I mean, the Jewish population in America supposedly makes up just 1% of the population, but every other asshole I meet out here in Hollyhood is fuckin Jewish.
I was taking the mail out for my boss last week, and he had a letter addressed to the Jewish Boys & Girls Club.
What? The regular Boys & Girls Club ain't enough? Share the fuckin' love people. We unchosen folks have some talent too.
..but today is christmas eve and i'll be all zen about it and prolly try to satisfy. come friday i'll run back into hating it.
Says the guy on the computer, commenting on a website...
And I mean impossible.
I don't even live in America at the moment, or an English-speaking country for that matter. But STILL in every single store, mall and other public place people are subjected to the songs mentioned in the article. I thought this was a North American phenomenon, but clearly it has spread. The best part? I now get to hear not only the originals, but also all the local remake versions IN FINNISH, which, after the linguistic novelty wears off (about 20 seconds in), are probably about 100 times worse than the English ones.
But there is one good and worthy Christmas song that isn't anti-Christmas! The Pogues, "Fairytale of New York."
Thinking back...
Charlie Brown, you were right!
Christmas marks time, as the next hurdle after Thanksgiving. I duck and cover. I rent Planet of the Apes, make a bunch of food my partner and I like, and wait it out.
Christmas music is absolutely, unquestionably awful.
It mystifies me that Christmas makes so many people miserable (e.g. the nasty mothers Adam Bregman refers to) yet they still participate in it. While I'm sure some people genuinely enjoy it, from the outside it looks like a big obligation fest.
I am an atheist and resent Christmas being foisted up into my face every year. It used to put me into a cold sweat as a child. I've since resigned myself to it. Consumerism and Christian-domination--or to quote science chick: " the Christian Industrial Complex," a brilliant phrase by the way--will not be stopped. So I flip it the bird in my own quiet way.
Oh and of course the Christians had to take over the movie theaters this year, and the last few years before this. As a kid, the only solace for a Jew like myself on Christmas day, was to go to the movies and eat chinese food because it was the only food place open and NO ONE would be there--except other Jews and non-Christians. For the last few years, however, Christians have been getting tired of staring at their families and going to the movies! OMG! You guys were the ones who said that we must close the majority of businesses just so you can have family time, and now you're going to disrupt my only available activity? bah humbug!
p.s. I said Happy Chanukah/Happy Festivus to every person who said Merry Christmas to me, and it felt GREAT
maybe best to stay away from family gatherings after all
but let's face it - music anywhere you are for a public purpose is horrible and should be banned like smoking in workplaces. elevator music, shopping music, hold music, hold music interrupted frequently to tell you loudly that THE NEXT AVAILABLE REPRESENTATIVE WILL BE RIGHT WITH YOU, or FOR ALL THE INFORMATION WE THINK YOU'RE CALLING TO GET BUT REALLY ARE NOT, CHECK OUT OUR WEBSITE YOU ALREADY FAILED TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM WITH AT WWW DOT WE-SUCK-AT-CUSTOMER-SERVICE DOT COM, the music that some fool thought was really hip for the young people, so they added it to the educational display at the aquarium... all of it. all that music needs to go. if i want a song i hate stuck in my head, i'll pick it out myself. the obsessive music-players of the world must all gallop over a cliff and die now.
If you don't like the music, stop shopping at the store and write them a note as to why.
That's your question to answer, not mine. You're the one who gets to write fancy articles for a fancy paper.
This piece was humorous and enlightening. Not.
Jewish people crying over Christmas...
Next topic...
I'd like to be more sympathetic, but I frankly have the opposite problem: I like to leave decorations up & celebrate through January 6th, and I get tired of snarky remarks and funny looks from people: "You haven't taken things down YET?!" Gee, sorry, no I didn't rip everything down Dec. 26th. Welcome to rainy, depressing, bill-filled January--happy?
Such is life. :)
http://www.jews4jeez.com
Channukah just can't compete.
And Adam, get over yourself. Bitter Jew, how stereotypical.
The tree on fire is so delightful.
When the height of it is way down low,
Let it glow, let it glow, let it glow.
I'll thank you to keep your grubby, commercialized paws of MY fucking holiday.
The undifferentiated masses have won because THEY ARE THE MAJORITY. It just so happens that the majority also celebrate Xmas and not Hanakkah, Kwanza, or whatever.
Like the writer, I am also a Jewish Christ-Killer (thank you Adolf:-)
I accept that we´re outnumbered. But outnumbered in the sense that some of us, regardless of our upbringing have taste and would do almost anything to hear Handel´s Messiah or Bach´s wonderous Christmas Oratorio, or even the Fuckin´Four Seasons instead of the earworms we´re forced to endure.
But cheer up Ebenezer, in due time there'll be a lot less consuming going around when we're all a stone throw away from all out economic depression. With any luck, maybe the Yuletide schmaltz will come down a few notches when so many will be forced to focus on more pertinent matters like the recent foreclosure of their home. If war, poverty, and the general brutality of most of this planet will not compel us to give a damn about something more than getting the latest Xbox or ill-fitted clothing from some nameless sweatshop; well then hit us in the pocketbook! $4 per gallon gas sure made some soon-to-be Humvee consumers think twice. Maybe a sizeable reduction in income and benefits will teach us “the true meaning of Christmas” and Santa will leave the building not because we told him to fuck off but rather because there simply was less of a need to have him there at all.
I think this entire article is completely contrived. Like people who are "afraid" of clowns. I call bullshit.
If not a hoax, then I'm sorry you're a gigantic, intolerant, self-important asshole, Adam. And sorry for your family, too.
IF I were a Christian, I think I'd truly abhor what has been done to what was once a religious festival. (But some Christians of earlier eras, such as pre-Revolutionary America, banned the celebration of Xmas. Maybe they had some premonition of what a crass commercial farce it might turn out to be.)
Here's why I have no issue with Easter:
1.It's not a "season". It's a weekend.
Sure, some Christians do Lent which is over a month but they tend to be quiet about it. And Lent, giving up something, is anti-commercial.
2. Easter is still, at least for adults, a religious holiday. The adults who celebrate it tend to be Christian and in general have a clue as to what the holiday's about.
3. No Frigging Easter Carols/MUZAK!!
When someone wishes me "merry xmas" I say "happy solstice." If after solstice, I say "happy new year."
When someone asks me if I'm "ready for Xmas" I say that I'm not Christian so I don't celebrate Xmas. It's so fun to see their reaction since most people either don't associate Xmas with Christianity OR (I hope this isn't the case) they have trouble realizing that there are non-Christians in the world.
Xmas Muzak is the most annoying aspect of this Commercial Insanity. But I really don't like it when IN NOV., someone "compliments" me on my "Xmas sweater" because it happens to be red. Why is red red most of the year, but in Nov. and Dec., it suddenly becomes "Christmasy"?? Vomit!!
Christmas comes around one time a year. Grab an ipod and go about your time free from the music.
I don't like obnoxious kids but I am forced to deal with them in public 365 days a year. I think you can survive a few weeks of Santa and his music during the Christmas season. :)
I complained about having to sing xmas carols in school when I was there in the un-pc 70s when they were allowed to be religious; I complain about my kids having to sing them now, when they're not supposed to be but are.
And yeah, I would like to be able to buy my damned groceries w/o listening to the damned bells. That's on the loudspeaker or (really sharpen your knives for me now) in the hands of the salvation army too.
P.S. Treat your baristas nicely. Your next one might be me.
Save Ferris's cover of the Waitresses' Xmas Wrapping is good for two listenings.
Adam Sandler's Santa I've been a bad boy & the 3 Channukah songs.
Vandals. Bears repeating: VANDALS. Sugarplum fairie rock out comes to mind.
Matt and Trey / South Park Xmas. (Isaac Hayes singing 'what the hell child is this.' FTW: "He's whiiite, so he cannot be minnnne." Close second: Kenny & Mr Hankie's song "You can suck all the dick you want, and still be a Virgin, ...Mary.")
Charlie Brown special: Mr. Schultz had xmas angst DOWN before anyone else.
Yeah, yeah it's immature and pure fantasy. But so is [thinking that Jesus' mom wasn't hiding an affair from Joesph?] shopping and hoping to be able to buy happiness. We all get our cheer from different sources. Prefer to concentrate on that fact, rather than all the things I could list under "dislike".
@16: you cannot simultaneously make an argument against the commercialization/excess of Xmas AND complain there aren't enough jewish greeting cards (taking up space, for sale, using up trees), at the same time. Pick a cause and LIVE it.
Supply and demand rules though: so long as suckers keep buying stuff, retailers will keep pumping the xmas pump harder and earlier & earlier in the year.
@6: seems that way in regards to comedy, sometimes, doesn't it? Guess jews have more to laugh it. The christians inadvertantly provide SO much material...
This is the most cliche thing you could have possibly written. I feel like your must have wrote it on purpose just to get a rise.
Go back to Egypt if you dont want to hear christmas music.
No, wait, there's a better way.
Adam, would you be offended if we exhumed seven more of these ancient crooners so we could stick all their heads on a menorah instead of pikes? Or would the commercialness of the hanukkah horror be too much schtick and not enough carrot?
Some of us believe in a cruel Santa that gives everyone what they deserve, not what they want.
Merry Christmas, Adam. Christmas music hates you back.
I hate Christmas. Joseph in the play threatened to kill his teacher a month ago...
I hate Christmas. Gross consumerism - and we're broke.
I hate Christmas. The worst s-o-bs that I have ever known loudly proclaimed their Christianity. I live in East Texas.
Nuff said.
Also, religion has very little to do with it. Personally, as a Jewish atheist, I find the traditional carols a lot less annoying than Rudolph and Deck the Halls. Also, I've taken to expressing my sympathy to the people working behind the counters, who have to listen to these songs all day. They tell me the songs drive them crazy. I don't ask them about their beliefs, but it's likely that at least some of them are Christian.
Oh and by the way, I work at Starbucks and they keep playing the same CDs over and over again. Haha. I'm grateful for my abundance of patience otherwise I might be writing a similar blog. :)
( I'm north of the 49th and we get winter almost 6 months of the year)... Does anyone out there know of any Radio Stations that are "non-Christmas friendly"?
I know your type... you would rather complain and wish the world will feel sorry for you.
You don't even try to overcome the situation. Yeah i hate the music too, but that's why you put on headphones. Then again you probably have earbuds in most of the year anyways so what are you complaining about? It only happens once a year so either deal with it or GTFO.
BTW no one here feels sorry for you. get over yourself. merry christmas you grinch.
I know your type... you would rather complain and wish the world will feel sorry for you. FYI the majority don't care about how you feel. we may agree, but we don't care.
You don't even try to overcome the situation. Yeah i hate the music too, but that's why you put on headphones. Then again you probably have earbuds in most of the year anyways so what are you complaining about? It only happens once a year so either deal with it or GTFO.
BTW no one here feels sorry for you. get over yourself. merry christmas you grinch.