Slog Comments
SL Letter of the Day: I Never Believed Those Letters I Read In "Savage Love" Until...
4
As far as I'm concerned he gets a free FAKE! pass for the brilliance of claiming to have been among the lucky few who got to see "The Kid".
7
I've been reading your stupid column for years and years and years (and years!) and this has to be the most amazing letter I've ever seen. It's a whole damn short story. It's almost too good to be true. Or it is?
12
can't get rid of these images of George Clooney singing Kajagoogoo...
if this weren't fake, my only advice to the guy would be: put any idea of "sweet revenge" out of your head completely. I don't care how good you are at Wordster, your friend George has you out-foxed six ways to Sunday.
if this weren't fake, my only advice to the guy would be: put any idea of "sweet revenge" out of your head completely. I don't care how good you are at Wordster, your friend George has you out-foxed six ways to Sunday.
13
@12 ME TOO. When I read in a story that "character 1 looks like such and such" it sticks that way in my mind. So this entire time I was imagining George Clooney watching Jason Segal jerking off. I can't have been the only one, can I?
And I can't wait for some enemy to take this comment out of context.
And I can't wait for some enemy to take this comment out of context.
14
Wow, tl;dr. Sorry, Dan, even your mystique won't get me to read past the first five paragraphs of that crap.
16
Fake as hell and I loved it. Advise: you can only go through with it if you send Dan a play-by-play (with anonymized photos???) of the 2nd time.
17
.....well. Okay then.
Did anyone ACTUALLY read the whole thing? The WHOLE thing?
If so, you are a champion. I'm sure I missed some good bits. You can tell it's fake with "He looks like blah blah"
Wow.
Did anyone ACTUALLY read the whole thing? The WHOLE thing?
If so, you are a champion. I'm sure I missed some good bits. You can tell it's fake with "He looks like blah blah"
Wow.
21
"Benjamin: Mrs. Robinson, if you don't mind my saying so, this conversation is getting a little strange."
24
In the unlikely event this is real, I'd suggest this route...
"Look, maybe we could do something else together. Mrs. Robinson, would you like to go to a movie?"
"Look, maybe we could do something else together. Mrs. Robinson, would you like to go to a movie?"
25
And here I thought that no one read Penthouse Letters anymore.
This sounds crazy, but it really happened to me . . .
This sounds crazy, but it really happened to me . . .
27
HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS THERE IS A GUY NAMED JASON SEGEL WHO I ALWAYS JUST ASSUMED WAS JAMES FRANCO WITH SCRUFF AND HE WAS IN THE MUPPETS AND I DID NOT EVEN KNOW
mind = blown
mind = blown
31
My BS-o-Meter was clanging off the charts with "To my horror, George trashed me in the next Wordster game ..."
Wow! What an AMAZING coincidence ... that an oft word-stumped breeder would suddenly wax literate at the thought of his man-hag jacking off in front of his completely straight self.
"...getting amazingly good letters and forming all sorts of long words ..."
We're beginning to see signs of your natural superiority here at word games. Amazingly ... well ... good!
"...which beefs up your score."
Whew! Thanks for clearing THAT cliff-hanger up! Next time, use spell-check ... especially toward the end, so the one-handed typing isn't so obvious.
Wow! What an AMAZING coincidence ... that an oft word-stumped breeder would suddenly wax literate at the thought of his man-hag jacking off in front of his completely straight self.
"...getting amazingly good letters and forming all sorts of long words ..."
We're beginning to see signs of your natural superiority here at word games. Amazingly ... well ... good!
"...which beefs up your score."
Whew! Thanks for clearing THAT cliff-hanger up! Next time, use spell-check ... especially toward the end, so the one-handed typing isn't so obvious.
32
For the fake epilogue there must be a webcam involved, with a free streaming feed, because as we all know, without fake pictures, it never fake happened.
33
I've tried to pull this stunt with a variety of different gay-friendly straight male friends, and it NEVER WORKS. So.... FAAAAKE! But if not, then he's one lucky SOB.
36
"So this entire time I was imagining George Clooney watching Jason Segal jerking off. I can't have been the only one, can I?"
Nope, you're not the only one. Somehow this seems SO over the top that I assume it's real and not a fake. Also, I know various people I can easily imagine occupying the George role. I don't know. I like it.
Nope, you're not the only one. Somehow this seems SO over the top that I assume it's real and not a fake. Also, I know various people I can easily imagine occupying the George role. I don't know. I like it.
37
@32 - but you know that once George has the fake pictures, he's going to fake blackmail the LW into fake servicing him every day after fake work..
39
@13 I have a feeling this scenario originated as fanfiction or online roleplaying of those two celebrities, and the author decided to see what would happen if her Jason Segel character wrote to an advice columnist.
42
Here's the giveaway: "Recently," "after work," ... and then "The apartment was on the sunny side of the street so he shouldn't have had to turn on many lights, but he did so anyway." Unless he's in Australia, it doesn't add up. (Adding, "George" said "dude," not "mate.").
45
While I was reading the slightly less unbelievable beginning, I thought, "Poor guy. He should have read the study in which men did better on math tests when they were offered money for each correct answer (women had about the same scores whether they were offered money or not). Motivation gets men's brains to work!"
46
Faker than the current Mrs. Gingrich's orgasms. But you gotta admire the balls on this guy trying to get it past Dan. And I laughed out loud more than once, so there's that.
48
You realize, Dan, that you've just offered tremendous encouragement to all the fake letter writers out there. I can't believe that's what you wanted.
53
Well, if Michelle can then write the next report (with details on what she looked at exactly)... then I'll take back my (still ungiven) 'fake' seal.
54
Fake, obviously, but pretty hot.
I would tell the fictional character of this fictional situation that a fair rule in this fictional punishment is that since he is gay the fictional woman should not be allowed to participate in any way and no fictional recording devices may be used.
I would tell the fictional character of this fictional situation that a fair rule in this fictional punishment is that since he is gay the fictional woman should not be allowed to participate in any way and no fictional recording devices may be used.
55
Yeah fake. I don't believe for a second that he was able to hold back for 30 minutes, I almost came after the 1st paragraph.
58
Heh. Fake, but fun. It doesn't even pretend to be a real SLLOTD.
I only hope you don't get inundated with more erotica as people try to surpass this one & get published. Or maybe that was your intention ;-)
I only hope you don't get inundated with more erotica as people try to surpass this one & get published. Or maybe that was your intention ;-)
59
it's actually not bad fiction, esp of the erotic variety. he (or she?) should submit it somewhere! exactly as is, too, as a letter to dan savage. with dan's answer even! so pomo!
60
@58, huh. that's a great idea! and yeah, s/he doesn't really need to submit it anywhere, does s/he? it's already been published!
61
"This is a long one. I apologize for the length." And who knew it would be a fake letter after that line.
62
Come on guys this is totally believable. We 100% red-blooded straight dudes challenge each other to masturbate on command all the time.
Guys?
Guys?
63
@48- Dan doesn't mind obviously fake letters if they are sufficiently hot. So yes, he *is* trying to encourage them.
64
If WHIGMI's team is +guy (whether girl +guy or guy +guy), then sex with Michelle would be to him what sex with a guy would be to George, whose history has been to play for team +girl (whether guy +girl or girl +girl).
He should consider that if he can actually interact sexually with Michelle, he would get to experience what George likes -- under George's watch -- however much WHIGMI doesn't like it. The experience would give him something to focus-on to please George directly should WHIGMI have the actual opportunity to interact sexually with him. So paradoxically, this opportunity for an experience +girl would give WHIGMI access to advance an agenda +guy.
...which I'm guessing is something an actual gay guy would have considered and be alright with, which is why I'm going to guess this letter was actually written by a straight woman who hasn't got enough to do.
He should consider that if he can actually interact sexually with Michelle, he would get to experience what George likes -- under George's watch -- however much WHIGMI doesn't like it. The experience would give him something to focus-on to please George directly should WHIGMI have the actual opportunity to interact sexually with him. So paradoxically, this opportunity for an experience +girl would give WHIGMI access to advance an agenda +guy.
...which I'm guessing is something an actual gay guy would have considered and be alright with, which is why I'm going to guess this letter was actually written by a straight woman who hasn't got enough to do.
68
Just in case this is real...
If you think this would be hot boundary pushing, go for it. If you think this would be therapy time, back the hell out. It is just a bet.
If you think this would be hot boundary pushing, go for it. If you think this would be therapy time, back the hell out. It is just a bet.
70
So, on the off-chance that this is real, my thought here is "Okay, so you challenged a straight guy you have the hots for, while drunk, to a game that you could beat him at with your eyes closed. And he beat you fair and square and now you want to welch in the face of some good old-fashioned 'be careful what you wish for' karma. Y'know what, dude? Pay your bets and go to hell."
72
It was going great until George Clooney started winning the game he is known for losing most of the time.
From the guys that brought you Superbad and The Hangover comes the hottest bromance of the century!
"The Bet", starring George Clooney and Jason Segel.
From the guys that brought you Superbad and The Hangover comes the hottest bromance of the century!
"The Bet", starring George Clooney and Jason Segel.
Comments (73) RSS