Savage Love Podcast Comments


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I liked this Episode. Especially the part when you gave advise about, not falling for guys that accuse a girl of cheating.

Posted by Maya1 on July 10, 2012 at 7:03 AM · Report this
Jesus Christ Dan shut UP about the pronouns! The vast majority of us are not insane glitterbombers lurking in the shadows waiting for you to make a misstep, and we don't want to hear about the insane glitterbombers. We just want to listen to some damn advice.
Posted by dchari on July 10, 2012 at 7:44 AM · Report this
I like the Church of All Worlds.
Posted by Dragonrose36 on July 10, 2012 at 8:48 AM · Report this
I'm impressed with the emotional intellegence and maturity of the 18 year old caller concerning her desire to reconnect with her ex-boyfriend after their first year at college.

Her ability to handle and navigate ending a relationship (rather than attempt to carry out a LDR, which they thought they couldn't do), forming a friendship with that ex, and then clear-headedly deciding to get back together with him is incredible and laudable. Although less straightforward and more messy, I have recently had a similar experience - having a relationship, break-up (not mutual), friendship, then romantic / sexual reconnection after long time period.
Posted by lovestolisten on July 10, 2012 at 8:59 AM · Report this
Try the singular "they", Dan!
Posted by UtterEast on July 10, 2012 at 9:01 AM · Report this
Man, all those reasons for vaginal pain at the end of the call had me raging at the poorly organized nature of the universe. I glare daggers at people who like to wax poetic about the perfections of the human body. If by some vast cosmic joke there is an "intelligent designer" for humans, I'ma walk up and kick them in their poorly designed genital area.
Posted by UtterEast on July 10, 2012 at 9:51 AM · Report this

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Posted by oto on July 10, 2012 at 11:35 AM · Report this
I thought the guy wanted his ex to write him a letter about why she was breaking up because she couldn't vocalize her reasons. His real question was about whether or not she was playing mind games with him by insisting they still live together, give each other affection, and sleep in the same bed for the next month and a half before they move out.
Posted by TN Listener on July 10, 2012 at 11:37 AM · Report this
i'm a lady living in straightland and i just wanted to say that threesomes with your current and your ex can happen. i'm living the threesome dream at the moment without unicorns or magical bi people! it might be rare in straightland but it does exist.
Posted by msrobyn on July 10, 2012 at 12:28 PM · Report this
I'm in a heterosexual relationship, and the best group sex experiences we've had have been with exes. Not all of us are looking for unicorns Dan!
Posted by Vair on July 10, 2012 at 3:17 PM · Report this
bella28 11
omg! Dick biting lady! I related to your call because I dated this guy who seemed to like everything rough, including blowjobs (actually, I don't know if you could really call them blowjobs--throat fucking is a more accurate description), and one time I REALLY scraped the head of his dick with my teeth and I felt so bad and said I was sorry. But he said he liked a rough blowjob and he didn't even flinch! I thought it was really remarkable...and hot. Then again, he didn't have me chomping down, so I can't relate to that. Anyway, have fun! (Also, don't read The World According to Garp while having sex with this person. Seriously, don't.)
Posted by bella28 on July 10, 2012 at 3:45 PM · Report this
Oooo, a producer credit now? A promotion, I hope, for a tech-savvy probably no longer so youthful and no longer at-risk individual?
Posted by Functional Atheist on July 10, 2012 at 5:15 PM · Report this
spece108 13
Thanks for addressing the gender id question. I found your advise thoughtful, compassionate and likely insightful. I wish all the best for those kids. Don't worry about the future, be yourselves, be happy. Congrats on finding a soulmate early in life.
Posted by spece108 on July 11, 2012 at 4:48 AM · Report this
Amateur photos

Posted by Alan_001 on July 11, 2012 at 12:10 PM · Report this
#4, yeah, me too, although one can argue we should both have let it go and moved on instead of spending so much time orbiting each other. Dan is always saying "two years (or whatever) is not that long, you can get through it" to committed couples separated by grad school. Maybe these two are old enough for a monogamish long-distance deal after a year of school.
Posted by marmer on July 11, 2012 at 12:28 PM · Report this
I'd love to see an episode where the tech savvy no-longer youths answer some calls. I bet they've learned quite a few things.
Posted by Lilah on July 11, 2012 at 3:44 PM · Report this
My boyfriend likes some teeth during his blow jobs from time to time. Scraping, some biting... not quite what I'd call chomping, but definitely more than just some light scraping. Just does it for the occasional guy. Enjoy!
Posted by bitmar on July 11, 2012 at 4:36 PM · Report this
Somehow "nurse your gay wounds" is my favorite new expression.
Posted by AK on July 12, 2012 at 4:21 AM · Report this
I'm surprised Dan and the commenters haven't pointed out that the likely reason the man got dumped by his girlfriend was that he's a belittling, condescending a-hole!

The way he derisively and snickeringly said that his girlfriend didn't have the best decision-making skills... good for her for getting out from under his controlling thumb. Hope she makes it all the way out (sounds like they're still sleeping together).
Posted by LiveAndLet on July 12, 2012 at 12:40 PM · Report this
Gay guy here and I once hooked up with a bi guy who liked me to bite his cock. He'd be limp while I'm blowing him but once I gave it a little bite he'd get hard in no time flat.
Posted by StockBreak on July 12, 2012 at 5:59 PM · Report this
adam didn't think through his advice on promiscuity/double standards. its very clear that sex with multiple partners and perhaps even honest straying within a relationship is far more acceptable in the male homosexual community, guys just don't attach as much emotional stuff to sex as women, so why is there a double standard? well just look to your own community for the answer. sexual body only type straying is far less devastating to a relationship than emotional straying. furthermore the cuckold component is something you cannot deny, when a woman strays she may end up tricking her partner into raising some other guys children, a far more serious lie than anything else. so why double standards? its biological and rational, its not an excuse, but its an explanation why not everything is politically correct and simplistically equal.
Posted by fradimas on July 13, 2012 at 1:08 PM · Report this
There was a guy who called in and talked about how his ex-boyfriend was a drug addict, and even after four months later, he still couldn't stop thinking about him. He said he was having trouble getting out of bed in the morning and couldn't enjoy daily activities.

Dan responded, "You're fine. Everything's going to be fine."

In my (non-professional) opinion, this young man is obviously developing clinical depression. Telling him "you're going to be fine" is almost as dangerous as if someone called in and said, "I have cancer," and you said, "Don't worry, everything will be fine!" Treatment for depression is available, and I believe you should have advised him to seek it out.

Additionally, you insulted all people by mental illness by writing it off as insignificant.
Posted by Simon and Hall on July 15, 2012 at 6:49 PM · Report this
I concur with LiveandLet. I wish Dan had been able to have an on-air conversation with the caller to get to the bottom of his motivations. From the surface, he sounds like he has issues with control and entitlement that could easily manifest into some obsessive behaviors; e.g., asking that someone explain a reason for a break-up "in writing." He -- and his ex -- may have benefitted from the suggestion that he seek therapy if he has trouble accepting that the relationship is indeed over, and allowing this woman to move on with her life.
Posted by BeenThereDatedThat on July 17, 2012 at 6:25 AM · Report this
brothasoul 24
This message is for the 24 year old guy who was dumped by his 30 year old, live in girlfriend, in his words - "for no apparent reason" - who had asked her to write down why she wanted to break up with him, because conversation did not clarify this at all. My man, if after a two year relationship, the only thing your live in ex has to offer you is a breakup, without an explanation - she is not worthy of you! I don't want you to feel bad because you suggested that she write down what she was feeling, to help you understand. You said that you felt that things were going great, so her breakup with you, probably had you feeling confused, and the lack of an explanation likely left you frustrated. And if those words - confused and frustrated - are adjectives you are using to describe her after two years, she is most definitely not worthy of you still sleeping in the same bed with her on a nightly basis, and you telling her repeatedly that you love her, after she has broken up with you. Doing those types of things for her does not set you up to pass some test whereby you prove your love to her, it just rewards her immature behavior. Immature behavior that surprises me, since she is six years older than you. There are women out there who, if they broke up with you, would do so in a more mature manner. A mutual conversation. A rational explanation. Hell, there ware women out there who would not break up with you. They would love you, until the end of time. Go out there and find one of those women. That is the type of woman that is worthy of you.
Posted by brothasoul on August 9, 2012 at 1:28 AM · Report this
Dan, I'm sure you get some flack regarding pronouns and terms when it comes to transsexuals and transgendered individuals, but you handle it just fine. My boyfriend (FTM) and I (MTF) both love listening to your podcast and like when you offer pretty friggin sound advice to people dealing with trans issues. I think the way you handle trans issues, like most everything else you do in this arena is awesome and we are SUPER happy that you're out there helping to educate others on this subject. Keep it up and don't let a few bad apples (and they can be found in every facet of life) deter you from speaking your mind.
Posted by OstOgBajer on October 29, 2012 at 11:52 PM · Report this

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