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In before heartless bullshit, "Darwin!" and unfunny jokes.

This woman died a horrible death for no reason. There's literally nothing funny about it.
Posted by johnjjeeves on August 27, 2012 at 2:46 PM · Report this
MacCrocodile 2
@1 - But she was at Dorwin Falls.

You're no fun.
Posted by MacCrocodile on August 27, 2012 at 2:51 PM · Report this
There is no justifiable reason for anyone to stand or wade in a body of water above a waterfall. There are always extremely strong currents and a major danger of slipping. This was a sad, but entirely preventable death.
Posted by J.R. on August 27, 2012 at 2:57 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 4
Yes, but waterfalls and weddings, as well as long water-soaked dresses, are common iconography in many cultures.

Last night's Univision Miss Mexico had quite a few shots set like that.
Posted by Will in Seattle on August 27, 2012 at 3:05 PM · Report this
Cato the Younger Younger 5
I heard about this but let's be honest...this is TOTALLY what you would see happen in some low budget horror movie. Something about a waterfall that become alive and devours people.
Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on August 27, 2012 at 3:05 PM · Report this
Mike Force 7
those photos are probably mind-blowing.
Posted by Mike Force on August 27, 2012 at 3:23 PM · Report this
I was a volunteer in search in rescue when I was in high school. We had recover bodies from a particular waterfall near Mt. Baker a couple of times. And I tell you I get why. The falls were beautiful. I mean Maxfield Parish ideal. And they looked so gentle. Like something Bambi would drink from. I could see how they'd be irresistible to a worn out hiker.

But they were cold, man. Like a fifth of a mile right off a glacier cold. So your feet and arms numbed immediately.

And once you got about five feet from soft mossy edges of the creek the rock was as slick as glass. Juuuuust the right pitch that at first you'd think "no biggie."

But if you slipped? And without a rope, you would. Nothing was going to stop you.

It was a deadly slip and slide right over another forty foot falls into dagger like rocks.

There was even a guy, a climber, who roped himself in to a nice sized tree. But he slipped. And yeah he didn't smash on the rocks. The poor bastard hung there naked for a couple of days in only two feet of fast glacial run off and froze to death. I'm sure his limbs just stopped working and he couldn't pull himself only the twenty or so feet back to the bank.
Posted by tkc on August 27, 2012 at 3:28 PM · Report this
TVDinner 9
@8: Holy jeebus, that's terrifying. Um, thanks?
Posted by TVDinner http:// on August 27, 2012 at 3:41 PM · Report this
@1: She didn't die for no reason though. She gave her life so that she could have kickass wedding pictures.

Posted by suddenlyorcas on August 27, 2012 at 3:57 PM · Report this
internet_jen 11
During senior year in high school the senior class was putting together a sports segment for the Senior Video. One student did open water swimming, not a school sport but he was an avid swimmer. He drowned filming his segment in the Green River. April 29th 2002; that was a very bad decision to swim in a river during spring melt. I'm not sure if he ever did much swimming that early in the year, or if it was just a summertime sport. There were two students there filming him.
Posted by internet_jen on August 27, 2012 at 4:00 PM · Report this
emor 12

From my reading, she was below the falls, where scenic photos of waterfalls are usually taken. But I suppose your pointless chastisement is well intended.

What killed her was her dress that became very heavy when it got wet. It was so heavy two bystanders were not able to pull her out of the water. A baffling and sad death to be sure.
Posted by emor on August 27, 2012 at 4:18 PM · Report this
@3: You're right--the early media reports were inaccurate and scrambled the story (some claimed that she fell from a cliff). But, I read some more recent ones--the bride kept going into the river until she got into water over her head so she could get a shot of the dress floating. Ay-yi-yi! Nature: It's pretty, but it can kill you.

But, on the bright side, your post shows you to be a really nice, generous person.
Posted by J.R. on August 27, 2012 at 5:03 PM · Report this
Dr_Awesome 14
A high school classmate of mine went just as tkc described. She and some friends were hiking in the cascades near Wallace Falls. They stopped at a pretty pool, calm and still over the falls, and sat down with their feet in the water.

Someone's shoe slipped off and she waded out to get it. The water was deceptive- the current grabbed her and her friends had to watch her go over the edge.

I see now the bride did not go over a fall. But man, water will find a way to kill you somehow.
Posted by Dr_Awesome on August 27, 2012 at 5:33 PM · Report this
Free Lunch 15
Strange that the bride would agree to a situation where she'd risk getting her dress wet at all. What a horrible story.

Posted by Free Lunch on August 27, 2012 at 6:03 PM · Report this
keshmeshi 16

There's a new thing (I guess it's too soon to call it a tradition) where brides intentionally trash their wedding dress by jumping into water or rolling around in dirt for their wedding photos.
Posted by keshmeshi on August 27, 2012 at 6:07 PM · Report this
SPG 18
New rule: Anyone who mentions the name of a certain researcher usually associated with evolution when talking about someone's untimely death will soon die a tragic and ridiculous death due to karma.
My condolences to the poor bride's family. Not only have they lost someone suddenly, but now they have to hear this other bullshit associated with it.
Posted by SPG on August 27, 2012 at 6:44 PM · Report this
sirkowski 19
This is why same-sex marriage is dangerous. All those drowned homosexuals...
Posted by sirkowski on August 27, 2012 at 6:48 PM · Report this
Rotten666 20
Ok no jokes because @18 made a NEW RULE.

What a bunch of fucking jackasses up on SLOG now.
Posted by Rotten666 on August 27, 2012 at 6:55 PM · Report this
SPG 21
@20, quick lesson on "jokes"...if you make fun of the powerful, it's a joke. If you make fun of the weak and defenseless it's bullying.
Posted by SPG on August 27, 2012 at 7:28 PM · Report this
MacCrocodile 22
@21 - If you make fun of the dead, they'll never know.
Posted by MacCrocodile on August 27, 2012 at 8:25 PM · Report this
Rotten666 23
@21 So now that you are done laying out the "rules", you are giving me a "lesson".

You must be a real peach in the analog world.

@22 Zing!
Posted by Rotten666 on August 27, 2012 at 8:37 PM · Report this
SPG 24
@23, ...says the one with the name Rotten666.
Posted by SPG on August 27, 2012 at 11:14 PM · Report this
unfortunately abc news seems to have based their story on an earlier, uncorrected version of the montreal gazette.

no waterfalls were involved. the river is placid there, and in fact is called a 'lake' in that area. there was no 'strong current', just a slow one which became irresistible once the dress was soaked.

with the benefit of hindsight, it is apparent the woman made a tragic error. but it was an understandable chain of events, and there was nothing particularly stupid about it. if anything positive can come out of it (albeit from a distance), it would be to ingrain in as many people as possible that water is dangerous, and you should never underestimate what it can do. thousands of woman have been photographed sprawled in the surf in their wedding dresses (it's a fad), and it could as easily have been any of them. the fact that most people survive doesn't make it safe.

a better source for the story:…

and the since-corrected source abc probably used:…

nb most sites seem to be irresponsibly illustrating the story with completely unrelated photos of different places. the only photo i've seen which appears to be on the scene isn't available where i first saw it (i think it's from news camera video, actually) but you can see it here:… ://,r:7,s:0,i:105
Posted by Xtoph on August 28, 2012 at 12:57 AM · Report this
Canadian Nurse 26
Amidst the other weirdness: Her wedding was June 9, but they were still taking wedding pictures in August. Perhaps pictures on the day could have been enough?
Posted by Canadian Nurse on August 28, 2012 at 6:08 AM · Report this
Rotten666 27
@24 Great deflection! I guess I had no spelling errors you could pick out, so going after my handle will work just fine.

You win!
Posted by Rotten666 on August 28, 2012 at 7:30 AM · Report this

Are you fucking kidding me? One can only make jokes on the "powerful"? I don't think I could sigh louder nor my eyes roll any further from such nonsense.
Posted by Will up North on August 28, 2012 at 7:43 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 29
@18: Please lay out your financial status, job position, race, age, gender, etc. so that we know if we are allowed to make jokes about you or not.

You whinging twat.

Oh no! I hope you are "powerful" so that I did not just break your special wittle rule [clutches pearls].
Posted by Theodore Gorath on August 28, 2012 at 8:32 AM · Report this
What a bizarre and sad story.
Posted by Amanda on August 29, 2012 at 12:09 PM · Report this
New New Rule restores old ability to make jokes. Rejoice!
Posted by moo on August 29, 2012 at 1:15 PM · Report this

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