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Theodore Gorath 1
The absolute worst part of Christmas is anything having to do with religion.

Goodwill, family, giving, food, all of these things are totally independent of religion.

And of course, why we celebrate Christmas has nothing to do with Christianity or Jesus, but anyone with a brain already knows this.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on November 21, 2012 at 9:32 AM · Report this
May Robertson have a happy holiday.
Posted by TechBear on November 21, 2012 at 9:35 AM · Report this
Is it bad that I want to steal their presents? I always want more presents. : (
Posted by Zog in PDX on November 21, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
Sargon Bighorn 4
I've been trying to steal it and sell it in parts on the black market for years but no one is buying it any more. It's so cheap and tawdry. It's just tinsel and gingerbread. Worthless.
Posted by Sargon Bighorn on November 21, 2012 at 9:37 AM · Report this
I'm an atheist too yet "celebrate" Christmas. I like all the kitsch and atmosphere.

It's just a silly holiday hijacked by jesus-cultists from pagans. Remove the superstition nonsense and you have a good commercial holiday.
Posted by Falcor on November 21, 2012 at 9:39 AM · Report this
MacCrocodile 6
What isn't immediately evident here is that in an atheist's home, Christmas decorations are hung upside-down. This includes the camera.
Posted by MacCrocodile on November 21, 2012 at 9:44 AM · Report this
dangerousgift 7
It's not even Thanksgiving yet and already with the Christmas blogs?
Posted by dangerousgift on November 21, 2012 at 9:44 AM · Report this
Tingleyfeeln 8
But Robertson's brand of Christianity pissed on the Christmas spirit for everyone who isn't rich.
Posted by Tingleyfeeln on November 21, 2012 at 9:46 AM · Report this
kathotdog 9
But the Grinch learned to love Christmas and all its Jing-Tinglers.
Yep, Atheists over here! Love Christmas and the food and presents and decorations and gathering with family and friends and all that. And I will watch Hallmark and Lifetime xmas movies and It's a Wonderful Life and all that crap. And the South Park Mr. Hanky Christmas special with the Baby Jesus Fetus...
Posted by kathotdog on November 21, 2012 at 9:50 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 10
If anyone's miserable Pat, it's you.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on November 21, 2012 at 9:55 AM · Report this
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn 11
He's got a point. If we didn't live for nothing but making wingnuts miserable, why on Earth didn't we all vote for Mitt Romney? QED. Pat Robertson is too smart for us.
Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn on November 21, 2012 at 9:56 AM · Report this
"We sing Christmas carols, we give gifts to each other."

Sounds like someone needs to learn the same lesson the Grinch learned:
Maybe Christmas, he thought... doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps... means a little bit more!

Now if even the Grinch can figure that out, why can't old Pat Robertson?
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on November 21, 2012 at 10:01 AM · Report this
GoodOmens 13
Kill 'em with kindness Dan.
They spew hatred, you show love (and a little bit of snark).
Well done.
Posted by GoodOmens on November 21, 2012 at 10:01 AM · Report this
Matt the Engineer 14
But even secular Christmas is a mirror of religion. Millions of people lying to their children about a magical man that's always watching you to see if you're being good.
Posted by Matt the Engineer on November 21, 2012 at 10:02 AM · Report this
Rob in Baltimore 15
We all know that Christmas is a big commercial racket. It's run by a big Eastern syndicate, you know.
Posted by Rob in Baltimore on November 21, 2012 at 10:06 AM · Report this
venomlash 17
My girlfriend's family is pretty much lapsed Catholic (she converted to Buddhism) and they celebrate Christmas as an excuse to put many shiny objects on a tree and spend the day hanging out together and exchanging gifts.
Posted by venomlash on November 21, 2012 at 10:07 AM · Report this
does anyone care what pat robertson says anymore, other than maybe some near centenarians (respect) and people who just want to mock his idiocy?
Posted by ng53 on November 21, 2012 at 10:11 AM · Report this
Hernandez 20
Christmas carols, tree lighting and gift-giving have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with Christianity. I suppose you could make the case that some carols are overtly religious, but so many of them are not.

When it comes to Christmas, America as a whole hasn't really given a shit about little baby Jesus at any point in my 30 years on this planet.
Posted by Hernandez on November 21, 2012 at 10:15 AM · Report this
NoelleyB 22
@14 Many atheist parents love Santa Clause for just this reason. Santa is fake, and figuring this out is a great exercise in critical thinking for young children.
Posted by NoelleyB on November 21, 2012 at 10:17 AM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 23
I checked with Santa Claus, and he assures me that he has never, ever given Pat Robertson anything in his entire life.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on November 21, 2012 at 10:23 AM · Report this
Good example. Atheists can certainly appreciate the traditions of Christmas, even the religious traditions like carols and creches, without believing. Frankly, I like that some parts of Christmas are religious and other parts are for everyone.
Posted by DRF on November 21, 2012 at 10:24 AM · Report this
internet_jen 25
My house hold of room mates in their late 20's will be having a Mayan Doomsday themed Hanukkah party.
Posted by internet_jen on November 21, 2012 at 10:33 AM · Report this
Max Solomon 26
Sorry, Pat.

We don't celebrate the Christ Mass. We celebrate Yule. And we have the right to distinguish betwixt the 2.

Yule has all the good parts and none of the BS, and is older than the Christ Mass.

God Jul to your ancient, studpid, crazy ass, regardless.
Posted by Max Solomon on November 21, 2012 at 10:34 AM · Report this
Beth in NJ 28
You've gotta love these people who whine about a culture of entitlement every time they think their tax dollars are being used to fund something they don't support, then whine some more when someone tells them they aren't entitled to take other people's tax dollars to fund things they do support.

They're nothing but hypocrites engaging in a little guilt projection, where they accuse others of doing something they themselves are actually guilty of. I mean, I have never known any atheist who took offense when someone wished them "Merry Christmas", but I've encountered plenty of so-called Christians who had a hissy fit when someone wished them "Happy Holidays" because how dare you NOT say "Merry Christmas." There is no "War on Christmas", just a war on people who don't think religion should be subsidized with tax dollars.
Posted by Beth in NJ on November 21, 2012 at 10:54 AM · Report this
Time for the yearly pageant of pretending that Christmas is under attack. Oh, the outrage!

Posted by Proteus on November 21, 2012 at 10:56 AM · Report this
Bauhaus I 30
Gorgeous tree, Dan. Hard to not go over the top on a tree if you have the funds to decorate, but this is extraordinary without being de trop. Bravo.

Pat Robinson is such an old crackpot. Do even Christians listen to him anymore?
Posted by Bauhaus I on November 21, 2012 at 11:07 AM · Report this
Isn't it a bit early for this?

We haven't even done with Thanksgiving -- a day solemnly set aside for believers and atheists to join hands and dump on the vegans.
Posted by RonK, Seattle on November 21, 2012 at 11:16 AM · Report this
I challenge anyone to be happier than this atheist on Christmas Day, surrounded by the people I love, enriching each other's lives with laughter and joy.

Lack of God != Lack of Good.
Posted by Jonman on November 21, 2012 at 11:16 AM · Report this
Religion(--) & Decorations(-) & Materialism(-) & Holiday Cheer(-) & Musak(-) & Nog(+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++) = Christmas
Posted by dirge on November 21, 2012 at 11:16 AM · Report this
@14, 22: My kids are far enough apart in age that the older one had figured out Santa et al weren't real before we were telling her younger brother. So we just asked: should we pretend for him, like we did for you? Oh yes. No drama, but it was really fun at age 3, 4 to believe in Santa and she figured he should have that fun.

True fact: While she accepted that I was the Easter Bunny without batting an eyelash, she was puzzled as to how I had gotten the candy without her noticing. She was shocked to discover I was leading a secret life of child-free trips to Rite Aid.
Posted by IPJ on November 21, 2012 at 11:19 AM · Report this
Fnarf 35
You're a better man than me. I hope Pat Robertson gets bowel cancer for Christmas.
Posted by Fnarf on November 21, 2012 at 11:20 AM · Report this
MrBaker 36
Pat, it's god's will.
Posted by MrBaker on November 21, 2012 at 11:25 AM · Report this
Even if this were true - even if Christmas were what he thinks it is, and atheists hated it - how can anyone steal a family and religious celebration? Last time I checked, he's allowed to decorate his home, sing carols, give gifts, eat special foods, attend special religious services, love his god, and teach his children what he feels is true. He's just not allowed to force other people to do so, or to make other people pay for it.

The whole "War on Christmas" thing doesn't even make sense at first glance, much less stand up to examination.
Posted by agony on November 21, 2012 at 11:29 AM · Report this
Shorter Robertson: "Teh Godless Atheists want to steal our Christian holiday, which we previously stole from the Godless pagans!"
Posted by COMTE on November 21, 2012 at 11:30 AM · Report this
reverend dr dj riz 39
@30 pat robertson.. that old fool.. and no christians don't pay attention him anymore neither
Posted by reverend dr dj riz on November 21, 2012 at 11:31 AM · Report this
dwightmoodyforgetsthings 40
Christmas day is in our grasp
As long as we have hands to clasp.

But I'd spit in Pat Robertson's face if he came to my Christmas.
Posted by dwightmoodyforgetsthings on November 21, 2012 at 11:32 AM · Report this
totally bananas ...
completely bonkers ...
nutty like squirrel poo ...

someone guide this poor man back to his comfortable room with the soft walls ......
Posted by gerbil on November 21, 2012 at 11:34 AM · Report this
Simone 42
Count me as another atheist (though I don't call myself an atheist) who is into christmas. Oh and the Christmas Tree has nothing to do with your religion Pat, it is a German tradition with actual lighted candles on the tree. Pat should really try the traditional way of using real candles on a tree.

In a few weeks I'll be playing my looping Yule Log video on my computer.
Posted by Simone on November 21, 2012 at 11:35 AM · Report this
Rob in Baltimore 43
Jeremiah 10:2-4

2 This is what the Lord says:

“Do not learn the ways of the nations
    or be terrified by signs in the heavens,
    though the nations are terrified by them.
3 For the practices of the peoples are worthless;
    they cut a tree out of the forest,
    and a craftsman shapes it with his chisel.
4 They adorn it with silver and gold;
    they fasten it with hammer and nails
    so it will not totter.
Posted by Rob in Baltimore on November 21, 2012 at 11:38 AM · Report this
Catalina Vel-DuRay 44
Having just gone through an exercise in linguistics in trying to put out a newsletter that talks of LED Christmas lights, I sort of sympathize. No, not really, but it did inspire more than a few ridiculous conversations.

I put the creche out every year, mostly because it's the same one my parents had when I was a child, but also because I love the idea of the story... The poor family, forced by circumstances to take a trip they can't afford, take refuge in a barn and give birth to a child that is supposed to save humanity.

It didn't work out that way, of course, but it's a nice thought.

Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay on November 21, 2012 at 11:46 AM · Report this
The War on Christmas is the father of the Redefinition of Marriage. Another descendant will appear in due time.
Posted by sarah70 on November 21, 2012 at 11:51 AM · Report this
Like Pat, I always feel closest to Jesus when I'm decorating my Christmas tree. And it just infuriates me to think I'm not allowed to celebrate that first beautiful pine tree planted by Baby Jesus after he hopped out of the manger, so the wise men had somewhere to put all their shit. And who can forget the miracle of the lighted candles and shiny stuff, after the tree grew in one single night?

Damn atheists.
Posted by LateBloomer on November 21, 2012 at 11:51 AM · Report this
Fortunate 47
Another atheists who will be having a big ass tree, presents, and Santa Clause all over the freaking house. Just no Jesus or any of that other religious stuff with the exception of playing some Christmas music.

Other than I am all for keeping Christ out of Yule.

For those who get something out of the imposed religion on this seasonal festival, go for it. But in the US Christmas is, for many, a secular seasonal holiday. A break from the daily drudge in the coldest and darkest part of the year to bring a little cheer. Those of us who don't buy into the whole god idea can still appreciate that.

Axis tilt is the reason for the season.
Posted by Fortunate on November 21, 2012 at 11:57 AM · Report this
More, I Say! 48
Huzzah for xmas-loving atheists! What is not to love about presents (giving and getting), shiny ornaments, and colored lights?! It's the one time of year you can decorate your house like a crazed gay disco and it's totally okay! Can't wait to unpack the pink tinsel tree!
Posted by More, I Say! on November 21, 2012 at 12:05 PM · Report this
Well I fit in the category of what Robertson considers an Atheist and I would like to steal his Christmas. Everything should be Happy Holidays, Holiday Parades, Holiday parties and when a person makes a big deal about saying Merry Christmas I should have the right to punch them in the throat. And I'm tired of the liberal line about how Christians stole from the pagans, which is to somehow not make Christmas about Jesus. Christmas is still about Jesus.
Posted by sisyphusgal on November 21, 2012 at 12:07 PM · Report this
Atheist here too. We'd put up the tree every year too and enjoy the season but I don' think anyone wants to bother this year. My sister and I agreed to no presents, especially when we have enough money to buy ourselves what we need or want.

Happy Holidays, I think I'll donate to a few charities and break out the old Christmas sheet music.
Posted by arachnar on November 21, 2012 at 12:12 PM · Report this
You either keep xmas secular and get a federal holiday or you keep it religious and don't. What's it going to be, Pat?

btw I love my atheist jew christmas.
Posted by kersy on November 21, 2012 at 12:15 PM · Report this
Knat 52
I know I sure am miserable since I started getting my every Sunday to sleep in and do what I like, and I'm free to engage in as much casual sex as I can find, free of guilt. Absolutely, hedonistically miserable.
Posted by Knat on November 21, 2012 at 12:27 PM · Report this
kim in portland 53
Glædelig jul and may peace, grace, and kindness find its way into your heart in the new year, Pat.
Posted by kim in portland on November 21, 2012 at 12:55 PM · Report this
kim in portland 54

Happy belated birthday wishes, 5280.
Posted by kim in portland on November 21, 2012 at 12:57 PM · Report this
Megaera 55
Rob @43: Thank you for that! I thought I knew the bible pretty well, but I had never noticed that.

We celebrate the Solstices, rather than Xmas. Tree, no electricity, no nativity set.
Posted by Megaera on November 21, 2012 at 1:09 PM · Report this
ScienceNerd 56
My cats enjoy this atheist's christmas tree so much that I've once left it up for a whole year. We took to decorating it with seasonal objects, and even had a grateful dead bear tree for a month, complete with a stuffed Jerry Garcia angel on top.
Posted by ScienceNerd on November 21, 2012 at 1:14 PM · Report this
Reverse Polarity 57
Pat Robertson is a blood-diamond racketeering charlatan, peddling xtianity for every penny he can get his greedy hands on. He has less honest Christian spirit than the slug trail on my front step.

Me? I love everything about Christmas, the smell of the tree, the pretty lights, the warmth of good times with friends and family, the food... everything except the silly praying to some fictitious sky-grandpa, and tithing to con-men like Pat Robertson.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on November 21, 2012 at 1:16 PM · Report this
I wonder if Robertson knows that there are Christians who don't celebrate Christmas because they believe it's pagan. I guess those are not real Christians though.
Posted by Patricia Kayden on November 21, 2012 at 1:19 PM · Report this
my extended family, all of us atheists/pagans/spirituality confused liberals, celebrate huge christmases, with good food, companionship, classic carols, the nativity, the season of advent.

Christmas is a season of light coming on the darkness of the world, the winter solstice, the new year.

these things are sacred with out god, without salvation, without simplistic, paternalistic, perverted religion.

Our evangelical relatives choose not to celebrate with us.
Posted by Thyme on November 21, 2012 at 1:29 PM · Report this
This is this atheist's "Athiest Christmas Card (email)" I send out every year:

The way I figure it, there was a time, before any religion, before any nation, before any state or city, when the world was cold and hard and winter was a time that meant starvation and death. So, to survive, we banded together. We shared when we had plenty with those that did not. We made a place around our fire for those that needed warmth. We let go of petty things and came together in the face of strife. That is what this time of year means. That is the reason for the season. We celebrate that fact that when times are tough, we come together and remind each other that we are not alone. So, to all of you, I’d like to remind you that you’re not alone. You’ve got a place by my fire anytime you need it. Here’s wishing you warmth, light, love, and peace.

If Pat Robertson has a problem with that, I'm sorry for him.
Posted by shiftyeyedog on November 21, 2012 at 1:30 PM · Report this
venomlash 61
@21: No, but she has family members who are.
Posted by venomlash on November 21, 2012 at 1:40 PM · Report this
I must say, I had a Jewish friend who did ruin Christmas for me, by convincing me that it was evil, all public displays of Christmas celebrations being nothing but religious persecution of non-Christians. The fact that I wasn't a Christian, and that most aspects of Christmas are secular, or at least pagan, and not Christian, meant nothing to this friend; moreover, any Jew who liked Xmas and indulged in Hanukkah bushes and the like was labeled a "self-hating Jew." Unfortunately, I was convinced for a long time. Getting back my enjoyment of the holiday has been a long, slow, deliberate process.
Posted by Drusilla on November 21, 2012 at 3:06 PM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 64
I celebrate the New Year. Kind of. Christmas just seems silly to me. Blow money, eat like a pig. All to celebrate myths, falsehoods and superstitions. It's on it's way out. Like the ancient Robertson.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on November 21, 2012 at 3:42 PM · Report this
Even though I wish I could just go into a coma until the middle of January, I have no desire to spoil anyone else's fun, however much it might make me recall Miss Brodie on film reacting to Emily Carstairs' collection of merit badges from the Girl Guides.

By being so easily and unquestionably the most majoritarian holiday and not only blatantly but proudly so, Christmas manages to outdo even 2/14 in the Heterosexist Sweepstakes (which really ought to be a game show). One cannot watch television for one of Miss Mackay's quarter hours without seeing multiple advertisements for multiple syrupy specials about how the Magic of Christmas brought together yet another pair of Shiny Happy Heteros. I'm just surprised the conversionists haven't started putting out their own line of specials guaranteed to be the secret favourites of PFlag parents everywhere (not to mention the open favourites of the PFox crowd).

And still I wouldn't wish it spoiled for anyone else.
Posted by vennominon on November 21, 2012 at 4:26 PM · Report this

WOW. Picture is gorgeous! Stunning architecture inside your home, Dan, what with the built ins, fireplace, big mantle, big gorgeous picture window, beautiful big white old fashioned window trim, etc. I LOVE the three stockings emblazoned with names! Sorry, but that is adorable. Stunning tree too. You atheist homos sure know how to do Christmas ...

Posted by Velvetbabe on November 21, 2012 at 4:43 PM · Report this
venomlash 67
@62: Any Jew who puts up a Hanukkah bush is being an idiot. Nothing wrong with an M.O.T. liking Christmas, but enjoy your neighbors' decorations instead of ripping off the holiday!
But yeah, that friend was being an ass.
@63: No, father and brother.
Posted by venomlash on November 21, 2012 at 5:36 PM · Report this
@62 I can understand where he's coming from. I got a ton of shit growing up Jewish and was constantly harassed by Christians, and as much as we may talk about the pagan origins of Christmas decorations, xmas is a religious holiday and is treated as such by the majority of people. Like I mentioned above, I enjoy my jewish atheist xmas and I cannot speak for all Jews, but I understand how emotionally taxing it is to be bombarded by Christian imagery.
Posted by kersy on November 21, 2012 at 5:57 PM · Report this

We're atheists. My wife even moreso than I.

But you know why we lie about Santa? It teaches an important lesson to kids about how to think for yourself, how to question radical claims about the supernatural, and how to pull back the curtain on the Great and Powerful Oz.

In fact, someone wrote something about that once...…
Posted by gromm on November 21, 2012 at 9:48 PM · Report this
The best part I like about Christmas is celebrating the Solstice instead. The kids get their presents 4 days early, we fuck the establishment, and we celebrate how the days will now get longer (because I live in Canada and that shit matters!).

Then we go to Grandpa's. *He* celebrates Christmas.
Posted by gromm on November 21, 2012 at 9:53 PM · Report this
@68, yes -- when people don't talk about the "real meaning of Christmas" (by which they don't nean trees and presents), I'll believe it's not really a religious holiday.

The early Christians designated mid-winter for Christmas to replace the Roman Saturnalia -- that happened before Jul (which started about 4th century in Germany). And just about every religion has a festival of lights in mid-winter.
Posted by sarah70 on November 21, 2012 at 10:03 PM · Report this
One of my favorite Tim Minchin songs is about his love of Christmas:…
Posted by JPT on November 22, 2012 at 12:21 AM · Report this
As is usually the case with different groups living together without open warfare, nobody is really trying to steal any traditions away from anybody else -- but, confronted with the difference, people often like to imagine that someone does. Why are we always so afraid that someone is going to come and take our most beloved toys away from us?
Posted by ankylosaur on November 22, 2012 at 8:16 AM · Report this
ScrawnyKayaker 74
@14, 22 My favorite atheist bumper sticker idea:

"Santa Claus, The Tooth Fairy, God. Grow up."

Bad odds on avoiding vandalism to your car, unfortunately.
Posted by ScrawnyKayaker on November 22, 2012 at 9:52 AM · Report this
ScrawnyKayaker 75
Dan, I hope that picture is from a previous year. Putting up the plastic, aetheistic, Solstice Sprig before tomorrow is ANATHEMA!
Posted by ScrawnyKayaker on November 22, 2012 at 9:55 AM · Report this
I am also an atheist. That is how our home looks at Christmas as well. Being an atheist doesn't have to mean being a spoil sport.

Christmas is fun. Therefore, we celebrate it. I don't have a creche though. On the other hand, we do make Gingerbread houses.
Posted by Learned Hand on November 22, 2012 at 2:20 PM · Report this
Shut up pat...geez...
Posted by embarrassed in kentucky on November 22, 2012 at 6:37 PM · Report this
sissoucat 78
@74 To protect your car, could you try this : "Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, God : Growing up."

Maybe then the stupid and destructive ones would not understand that it's about what people cease to believe in while growing up ?
Posted by sissoucat on November 23, 2012 at 2:16 AM · Report this
dwightmoodyforgetsthings 79
@69- You can teach critical thinking without punking your kids. I'd rather my daughter know that her parents are honest to the best of their ability.
Posted by dwightmoodyforgetsthings on November 23, 2012 at 10:37 AM · Report this
Usually Pat Robertson makes me angry, but in this clip he just seems so... well, miserable.
Posted by Marone on November 23, 2012 at 12:20 PM · Report this
Tacoma Traveler 81
Someone has to sneak their way on to his show as a guest of some kind, preferably if it is being televised live. Upon getting a working microphone and cameras trained on them, this "guest" must simply do one thing: laugh. Loudly. Continuously. Uncontrollably.

If you try to argue with an evangelical, you will get nowhere, because these people do not use reason as an operating system. If you try to insult them, they will start on some persecution trip about how christians (who comprise the overwhelming majority of this country) are somehow oppressed because a few of us think they're crazy.

but there is something visceral about laughter that disrupts them. Televangelists make their wage by appealing to people's darkest fears and unspoken paranoias. They speak to hate and terror, primal emotions far more powerful than logic. And if you laugh at that, you are speaking the same emotive language they are, you're just using that primordial emotional part of their brain to communicate something else, namely, the ludicrosity of televangelism.

Laughter is the antithesis of fear. Its just as powerful as hate, and it can be used to disarm hate. It takes the power away from the bigot without sinking to their level.

If we all did this, if we all simply laughed when we heard this nonsensical bullshit, with no explanation, no words, just laughter, we would completely discredit bigotry in the eyes of the people televangelists are so good at manipulating.
Posted by Tacoma Traveler on November 23, 2012 at 6:53 PM · Report this
Robertson knows very well that no one's trying to steal Christmas, just as the Church and other fundies knew no one was trying to redefine marriage. They're just stirring the pot to make their base feel like they're warriors for the conservative cause. I notice they've shut up about gay marriage and they usually shut up about Christmas in January.
Posted by sarah70 on November 23, 2012 at 8:58 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 83
His base are really old people who are starting to die off.

Now if they'd just stop blocking the aisles with their walkers ...
Posted by Will in Seattle on November 24, 2012 at 1:37 PM · Report this

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