To the asshole who farted on the 8 a.m. D line to downtown: While I was surrounded by people with no hope for escape, you decided to crop-dust everyone on the overcrowded prison of a bus this morning. Fuck you. Learn how to take a shit before you leave the house for work like the rest of us. I'm sure you thought it was pretty funny to spray your ass juice cloud around for everyone to deal with. Thank fucking God I sprayed Kenzo on my cowl neck before I left so I could somewhat escape your fart stank. Next time, get off the bus and go take a shit. GROSS!

—Anonymous