Every so often an issue arrives that neatly encapsulates The Stranger's journalistic mission statement. This is one of those weeks, as the subjects of both the short and long features can be used to perfectly sum up just what this miserable rag is all about: idiotic local transportation boondoggles and man-on-animal coitus.On the boondoggle front, it is ERICA C. BARNETT, as always, who is filing the story. The topic in her wonky crosshairs: Mayor Greg Nickels's supposedly secret plan to destroy Pike Place Market. Whether Mr. Nickels is indeed attempting to ruin one of Seattle's most-beloved tourist traps I'll have to leave for others—namely, real journalists—to convince me of.If the "feature well" (as it's known in the business) had merely consisted of Ms. Barnett's usual pontificating, perhaps this week's edition could have avoided both insult and injury. Unfortunately, there remains the aforementioned scribbling about man-on-animal canoodling, an assignment that arrived, not surprisingly, on the desk of The Stranger's least-moral scribe CHARLES MUDEDE. No doubt Commander Savage and his platoon of well-armed mouth breathers believe Mr. Mudede the perfect person of letters to tackle such an unseemly topic given his penchant for unsavory sexual practices (the photographic evidence of which is tucked away in a secure location, I assure you, Mr. Mudede). However, familiarity with a topic does not always a stellar read make—a truism that, in Mr. Mudede's case, has rarely held as much water as it does this week.Still, "Chuckles" should take at least a modicum of heart given that his painful diatribe is not the most wretched of pieces published this week. That honor is reserved for Savage Love. Talk about sex crimes! Why must a 62-year-old homosexual be so willfully filthy?COVER ART by Ye Rin Mok, www.yerinmok.com