Dont Do Blow
by Sandra Oh
Hello, this is Sandra Oh. Perhaps you recognize me from ABCs Greys Anatomy, on which I play the attractively wry surgical intern Cristina Yang, a role that recently earned me a Golden Globe. Or perhaps you know me from my film work, such as Sideways, in which I played a sexy sommelier with a violent streak, or Under the Tuscan Sun, in which I played Diane Lanes friend with a lesbian streak. However, today I am speaking to you solely as Sandra Oh, concerned citizen, and I have one thing to say: Dont do blow.
After so many years in L.A., I thought Id seen it all when it came to coke. Then I started filming Greys Anatomy in Seattle and goddamn|you freaks can totally put it away! As a member of a minority or two|Im Korean Canadian, thank you very much|Im sensitive to sweeping assumptions about large groups of individuals. But what the fuck is wrong with you people? I look around Seattle and its like California in the 70s, only everybody is pale and nobody is dressed like Stevie Nicks.
Forget how coke turns everyone into an asshole, the medical detriment alone should be enough to put you off the blow for good. Or maybe you all cherish the threat of decimated nasal passages, dead sensory nerves, perforated colons, and bowel gangrene. Whatever. Im not a doctor, but I play one on TV, and you should listen to what Im telling you. Dont do blow.
Love, Sandra Oh
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Seriously though: The surviving housemates of the Capitol Hill shooting have set up a Paypal account for the families of the victims. You can donate at www.paypal.com, to the e-mail address firstname.lastname@example.org.
CONGRATULATIONS SPEAKER SPEAKER!
At last Saturdays Stranger Big Shot competition at Neumos, Speaker Speaker were crowned kings! Not only did they get a bitchin trophy and a bottle of celebratory champagne, they also took home $2,000 in cash, equipment, a slot at the 2006 Capitol Hill Block party, an on-air performance on 107.7 The End, a day of free studio time from Orbit Audio, and more!
Many thanks to all the bands that played, including the nights headliners, Visqueen, and other Big Shot nalists the Emergency, Romance, and Tennis Pro. You were all fantastic. Also, many thanks to everyone who voted and to the sponsors who made the show happen: Jim Beam Black, Capitol Hill Block Party, Easy Street Records, Fastrax, Gibson, Miller High Life, Orbit Audio, 107.7 The End, and Epiphone.