I hate you commercial fishermen, each and every one of you. You swagger into my bar, full of testosterone, full of yourselves, straight off the "high seas," with all the bravado and machismo of Green Berets. Truth is, you're mostly ex-criminals, ex-drug abusers, and ex-alcoholics, though many of you still cling to the old ways. You're constantly bragging about all the money you make but never seem to have any or, God forbid, leave some for a tip. For those of you who can read or at least sound out words, pay close attention to what I'm about to say: You are not heroes. You don't save lives, help the less fortunate, safeguard the environment, or cure disease. Neither you nor your profession are remotely noble or heroic. Stay out of my bar. Stay out of my life. Drown. Die.