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Cthulhu has been trumpeted in the pages of The Stranger for years now: Grant Cogswell is a contributor to our paper, and the arduous making of the gay-themed horror film has been painstakingly documented from our film section to a very good making-of feature by Cogswell two months ago to a 2005 Drunk of the Week cameo (Tori Spelling sang "Eternal Flame" at the Bus Stop's karaoke night).
So it is not without a certain amount of institutional shame that I admit Cthulhu is a poorly made film with almost no merits. The "almost" here refers to the cinematography by Sean Kirby, which is, at times, beautiful.
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But everything else is shit. The pacing is awkward, the costumes are embarrassing, and the dialogue is wooden and just plain dumb. Waggish critics will probably comment that Tori Spelling puts in the best performance of the movie, but that's a lazy zinger: Her acting is exactly as bad as everyone else's.
The worst part is that the filmmakers are trying so hard to artfully
transcend the apocalyptic horror genre—to comment, through little
parodies and self-aware digs, that they're making a "real" movie with
"real" themes—that they wound up producing a horror movie that's
not in the least bit frightening. Cthulhu is possibly the worst
in a long line of shoddy H. P. Lovecraft film adaptations. It's a
goddamned shame, is what it is.
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It completely embraces it's B-movie aesthetic and has some legitimately scary/disturbing moments.
Come on Paul, give a little love to Lovecraft on film.
Hey, 'Worked on Film', you STILL can't spell the title right, and I still don't believe you worked on the movie. I recognize your bullshit from multiple posts over the years. Glad you scanned our IMDB page for everyone's name this time, though, and didn't say I was the director or something. Everyone's input was welcome and often heeded in the making of Cthulhu. Its flaws are pretty limited, actually, for a first project - how many first films get theatrical distribution, anyway? And even though the Seattle critics shot it down, it is enjoying a popular run and critical acclaim in the city to which the old Seattle culture (and all the young people!) has relocated, Portland. Not for everyone, I guess. But certainly for a lot of someones.
I found CTHULHU, which I saw at ye H. P. Lovecraft Film Festival, an excellent Lovecraftian film. I was expecting to be disappointed, especially with Tori Spelling -- and instead I was utterly blown away by her performance. The shot of her tied to ye post in ye water is an amazing cinematic moment. The film has a dark, dense, doom'd aura, and the cinematagraphy is superb. My drag-queen crown is off to yem youngsters who made this eerie film.
To you who bought my book, THE FUNGAL STAIN, thank you for supporting a Cthulhu Mythos author. I hope the book amus'd ye.
Best wishes from Hopfrog, Esq.
I found CTHULHU, which I saw at ye H. P. Lovecraft Film Festival, an excellent Lovecraftian film. I was expecting to be disappointed, especially with Tori Spelling -- and instead I was utterly blown away by her performance. The shot of her tied to ye post in ye water is an amazing cinematic moment. The film has a dark, dense, doom'd aura, and the cinematagraphy is superb. My drag-queen crown is off to yem youngsters who made this eerie film.
To you who bought my book, THE FUNGAL STAIN, thank you for supporting a Cthulhu Mythos author. I hope the book amus'd ye.
Best wishes from Hopfrog, Esq. (Queer Mormonz Rool Okay)
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