Yeah, it's a copy of that.

safireblues
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Jan 5, 2012 safireblues commented on Savage Love.
@151 whaaa?

Married 7 years, with him 10 years, open relationship. Both bi, both tend to have longer term lovers and friends of a slutty persuasion than just random hookups, but have done that too.

To the outside world, we are the perfect couple. And we are, but it's even better than they could ever know.

Oct 2, 2011 safireblues commented on Savage Love.
Had to come here after reading to column to help. Didn't have an orgasm until mid 20s. Think of it like a sneeze or a hiccup, it's a body's response to something, but it's not something you can MAKE happen. It would be like saying "Sneeze right now, make it happen." And you can't, because a sneeze occurs naturally.

You have to set the conditions for the orgasm to happen. I would suggest getting a small, cheap vibe if you don't have one. If you're on birth control, get off it and use condoms because it definitely affects your libido. Go to a tube website and search around for some porn you really like. Get in a comfortable position, if you don't like light, turn it off. Do only what YOU like, watch stuff that turns you on. Use the vibe on the top of your clitoral hood, not directly on the clitoris. Remember it's all about the tissue up inside the body, you want to stimulate that with vibrations.

Most important is what is going on inside your head. If your saying things like "this will never happen" or "I am fat", or anything self-conscious, you will inhibit yourself. Lose yourself to fantasy. Have a glass of wine or toke to relax. Don't TRY to have an orgasm, just vibrate and enjoy, watch porn...and it will happen, or it won't! Keep at it, and eventually you will figure out how to make it happen, and it gets easier each time after.

If you're with a guy who is obsessed with giving you an orgasm for him ego, tell him to knock it off, just take orgasm off the table and have great sex until you figure it out. Don't pressure yourself, that is the biggest inhibitor!

More...
Oct 2, 2011 safireblues commented on Savage Love.
Had to come here after reading to column to help. Didn't have an orgasm until mid 20s. Think of it like a sneeze or a hiccup, it's a body's response to something, but it's not something you can MAKE happen. It would be like saying "Sneeze right now, make it happen." And you can't, because a sneeze occurs naturally.

You have to set the conditions for the orgasm to happen. I would suggest getting a small, cheap vibe if you don't have one. If you're on birth control, get off it and use condoms because it definitely affects your libido. Go to a tube website and search around for some porn you really like. Get in a comfortable position, if you don't like light, turn it off. Do only what YOU like, watch stuff that turns you on. Use the vibe on the top of your clitoral hood, not directly on the clitoris. Remember it's all about the tissue up inside the body, you want to stimulate that with vibrations.

Most important is what is going on inside your head. If your saying things like "this will never happen" or "I am fat", or anything self-conscious, you will inhibit yourself. Lose yourself to fantasy. Have a glass of wine or toke to relax. Don't TRY to have an orgasm, just vibrate and enjoy, watch porn...and it will happen, or it won't! Keep at it, and eventually you will figure out how to make it happen, and it gets easier each time after.

If you're with a guy who is obsessed with giving you an orgasm for him ego, tell him to knock it off, just take orgasm off the table and have great sex until you figure it out. Don't pressure yourself, that is the biggest inhibitor!

More...
Oct 2, 2011 safireblues joined My Stranger Face
Oct 2, 2011 safireblues commented on Savage Love.
Had to come here after reading to column to help. Didn't have an orgasm until mid 20s. Think of it like a sneeze or a hiccup, it's a body's response to something, but it's not something you can MAKE happen. It would be like saying "Sneeze right now, make it happen." And you can't, because a sneeze occurs naturally.

You have to set the conditions for the orgasm to happen. I would suggest getting a small, cheap vibe if you don't have one. If you're on birth control, get off it and use condoms because it definitely affects your libido. Go to a tube website and search around for some porn you really like. Get in a comfortable position, if you don't like light, turn it off. Do only what YOU like, watch stuff that turns you on. Use the vibe on the top of your clitoral hood, not directly on the clitoris. Remember it's all about the tissue up inside the body, you want to stimulate that with vibrations.

Most important is what is going on inside your head. If your saying things like "this will never happen" or "I am fat", or anything self-conscious, you will inhibit yourself. Lose yourself to fantasy. Have a glass of wine or toke to relax. Don't TRY to have an orgasm, just vibrate and enjoy, watch porn...and it will happen, or it won't! Keep at it, and eventually you will figure out how to make it happen, and it gets easier each time after.

If you're with a guy who is obsessed with giving you an orgasm for him ego, tell him to knock it off, just take orgasm off the table and have great sex until you figure it out. Don't pressure yourself, that is the biggest inhibitor!

More...
 

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