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Apr 23, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on Savage Love.
Pretty much anything that can render you thoroughly unconscious, can also kill or harm you. If you're not a deep enough sleeper to do this au naturel, fake it.
Mar 22, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on Savage Love.
Dear MichelleZB: don't doubt. There are indeed people turned on by sexualized pokemon characters. I never woulda thunk it, but I've seen it. I think it's kind weird, and for me that is saying something, but it's there. My take is, if it makes them happy, and it is not harming anyone, let them go for it. If they need external validation, I am happy to provide it. Weird? Sure.

But I am a fan of weird people. Look what "normal" people have done to the world!

I would rather support the not-normal people.

I don't get the pokemon thing. To me, it's a turn off.

But I won't pretend its not real, and a turn-on to somebody else.

As long as it brings more happiness to the world, I am for it.

"And the goddess said, all the rites of pleasure are my rites"
Mar 20, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on Savage Love.
DOPE: I wouldn't worry too much. First, that there were images on the web for your son to peruse means there are others with similar interests. Yeah, it may seem strange, but its also harmless. There's a whol subset of the furry community into the same kink.

It's fairly normal to feel uncomfortable or confused when confronted with someone else's kinks or desires when we don't shate them, but that doesn't mean they're necessarily wrong or harmful.

As long as it's not on the sidewalk, scaring the horses and all that.
Mar 16, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on There Is No Morality Without Religion.
As a buddhist and human being, I am twice appalled at knowing that people can treat others that way, and somehow reconcile it with their religion. Anyone using religion as an excuse for terrible behavior is vile.
Feb 10, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on The Science Guy vs. The Creationist Guy.
I think, in a battle of wits, even if there's only one unarmed person, there can be no real winner.
Feb 10, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on SL Letter of the Day: Confused And Depressed.
Confused - don't think of not knowing the answers right this second as a problem. Think of them as a chance to explore and experiment. You don't have to know the answers now. Explore your fantasies, and figure out whether they're fantasies, or a sign of who you really want to be. Lots of people fantasize about things they wouldn't be comfortable acting on. That's okay. Some people's fantasies turn out to be about things that they _would_ like to act on. And as long as it's not hurting anyone, that's okay too.

You're fifteen. You don't have to know everything about yourself yet. You could be going through a phase (I've been through several, and I'm 43), or you could be discovering something important and permanent.

See where your feelings and your life take you. You don't have to be sure right this minute. An answer, to yourself and others, of "I don't know," is an acceptable answer, as long as its honest. When you do know, decide what to do about it then.
Jan 9, 2014 CoyoteConscious commented on SLLOTD: Err on the Side of Blowjobs.
As a guy who has had plenty of blowjobs, I can chime in with others who say that a lousy blowjob is better than no blowjob. The only major no no for most guys is too much teeth. Some guys like a little tooth action, but err on the side of not scratching penises with teeth. Put your lips over your teeth, if possible. Also, don't blow guys that keep trying to touch you in ways you ask them not to, whether with their dick or anything else.
Oct 9, 2013 CoyoteConscious commented on SLLOTD: Maladjusted Shits.
Monogamy does not have to mean "sexual exclusivity."

"Monogamy is a form of marriage in which an individual has only one spouse during their lifetime or at any one time."

I have a family member, and also a good friend, both of whom are asexual. My friend was in a committed, monogamous relationship with an equally asexual partner for many loving years until that partner's death.

Relationships don't need to be defined entirely by who, or whether, you fuck, Mr. Savage. Asexual people can be monogamous regardless of the fact that they don't have sex.

I agree that it's unfair to not reveal that you are asexual to a person you're dating who is not. I can get that.

But the bit about monogamy being based solely on sex seems to be a little surprising to me.
Jun 2, 2013 CoyoteConscious commented on Savage Love.
DMJ: One of my aunts was a sex worker, in the sixties, and she met an amazing guy, because he was one of her "Johns." The only thing that ever confused any of my family was that he was such a great guy, we didn't understand why he had to pay for sex. (I know, that's rude, but we didn't know any better).

They did get married. And they enjoyed one another's company. Eventually, the worst possible "if" happened, and they broke up. But after that, my aunt was still part of the family, and so was her ex-husband.

My point is that even if the very worst thing happens to a relationship - it ends, that doesn't mean it shouldn't have happened, or that everything's a mess.

If you get along, and you like one another, and you want to be together, do it!

And if someday, it's not working out, stop. Neither of you are bad or stupid for having enjoyed one another.

I hope that you'll make one another happy forever. And if you don't, I hope you'll both appreciate how happy you made one another for a while.

Your job where you met isn't "dirty" or "shameful" It's something you did, and possibly did well. And if you gave it up for love, that's not a sign of foolishness. It may be a sign of a job well done.

We shouldn't have to just live to work. We should be able to work to live.

If, in the end, it doesn't work out, that's no worse than any other couple (or threesome, or whatever-some) that don't work out.

I don't see why it would be any different if you married someone you brought food to, as a waiter or waitress, or gave health care to, as a doctor, orderly or nurse. So you were doing a job where people pay you for sex, and you hit it off on a _personal_ level with a "customer". It happens all the time.

You are both people. You both met through work. To my mind, sex is nice and all, but it's far less important than things like trust, shared interests, or above all - liking being around another person, and feeling good when you are together.

The best part is, if it turns out that you _don't_ want to stay together, that's okay too. Ya just leave.

Your job isn't "special" with special circumstances. It's the same as if you are a computer programmer, or sell gas, or jewelry, or work as a secretary, or a manager. You do what you're good at, in exchange for he money you use to pay rent, food and bills.

If you find love while on the job, bonus!
Feb 14, 2013 CoyoteConscious commented on Savage Love.
Hey, Ian McKellen is still very good looking! ; )