Oct 10, 2012
VB commented on
Savage Love.
Dan suggesting she lies to her boyfriend ;( Hopefully he will retract that stupid advice in his next column / podcast.
Several people have already said what I wanted to say, sit down and have a chat with your boyfriend about what would happen if you got pregnant.
Personally I had that chat with my current girlfriend and for the time being she said she would want to get an abortion if something happened. Which is good because that is what I want as well, my ex-gf was the same as well. If her view was that she would want to keep it I would probably have dumped her because it is not a risk I am willing to take.
All in all, really bad call on that one Dan. Next time please advice people to act like grown up and not scorn children.
Jul 25, 2012
VB commented on
Savage Love.
So many scorn people in here who seem to take out their own rage and frustration over being rejected at LITL.
Also a lot of people here talk about what an asshole the guy was for not telling her before sex. And how emotional sex can be and how it is hard to deal with that stuff after sex, etc...
Did anyone consider that the guy maybe wasn't sure if it was worth bringing up but decided in his more emotional state after sex to do so?
Personally I agree with Dan, she handled the situation bad and should have let him speak. If she wants a chance with him she should contact him and put her cards on the table.
She could apologize as well if she thinks she acted like an ass, if not then don't.
@71
Really? Really??? You describe it in a way that makes it sound like borderline rape (by some rape definitions).
Apr 11, 2012
VB commented on
Savage Love Episode 286.
It's funny to see all the replies to Fancy's_Pants original statement since it pretty much proved what she said. Almost every single reply has had a wildly different idea of what feminism is and isn't.
It's a loaded term and almost every self proclaimed feminist I have ever met had a list of things that every "real feminist" had to agree with her on. Of course the list of things varied depending on what that particular woman found important.
Mar 1, 2012
VB commented on
Savage Love.
Sad to see the amount of people here who are ripping into heartbroken. Personally I completely understand the situation she is in and I think her husband fucked up big.
Many people here seem to think that since she agreed to a threesome then she agreed to VP between her husband and the other woman... Really?
If someone agrees to do some light bondage, do they automatically agree to anything the other person feel like doing once they are tied up? Since you know... what do they expect to happen?
Sounds a lot like the reasoning many people use to justify rape. Well she went home with the guy... what did she expect to happen? Well she wore a short skirt, what did she expect would happen?
This is a complete violation of trust and his wife has every right to be pissed off with him.
No good sexual partner will willingly put their partner through a sexual act they do not wish to partake in.
Jan 25, 2012
VB joined My Stranger Face
Jan 25, 2012
VB joined My Stranger Face
Jan 25, 2012
VB commented on
Savage Love Episode 275.
I am mighty disappointed in Dan's advice to the 50 year old man who wanted to become better with women.
The fact is he doesn't need money or fame to be good with women, that is just bullcrap. It works on some women, but far from all. What he needs is a proper course in socializing and flirting, I would advice him to read "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie for a start.
It is a great book that you can practice in all areas of your life, it can help him at work, at home, with friends and with potential new loves (assuming his wife is ok with it).
Other than that there are parts of the pickup community that distribute positive attitudes and actual helpful tips for guys like him. One I would look up if I was him would be Wayne Elise, he has a lot of good stuff that is positive to women, not the usual pickup crap.
Several people have already said what I wanted to say, sit down and have a chat with your boyfriend about what would happen if you got pregnant.
Personally I had that chat with my current girlfriend and for the time being she said she would want to get an abortion if something happened. Which is good because that is what I want as well, my ex-gf was the same as well. If her view was that she would want to keep it I would probably have dumped her because it is not a risk I am willing to take.
All in all, really bad call on that one Dan. Next time please advice people to act like grown up and not scorn children.