Mar 14 TheRob commented on Savage Love.
I don't know about Judaism or Islam, but Christianity itself isn't against sex or kink (barring, perhaps, non-monogamy or promiscuity), it just sets it within certain confines (marriage). There's nothing suggesting it's wrong to flog your spouse, pee on them, get pegged by them, or whatever, and in fact, it mentions the importance of regularly having sex unless there is some specific reason you can't or agree not to (I think it mentions period sex, but... I don't know, whatever).

I grew up Christian and became atheist, so I don't exactly have a rose-colored-glasses view of Christianity, but the idea that it pushes nothing but vanilla sex seems like the type of nonsense implications people dream up and assume it came from the bible.
Feb 15 TheRob commented on Savage Love.
I feel like this week is a basket full of have-my-cake-and-eat-it-too questions.

"I don't want to have sex, but I want a romantic relationship with someone in the 95% of the population that does. What do I do?"

"I want to live for free with my parents as an adult, but don't want to follow the unreasonable stipulations my parents require in lieu of rent. What do I do?"

I feel for both LWs, but I think they're both being childish and entitled. The obvious answer with about thirty seconds of thought to the first LW is date other asexuals (of which there are few) or date nonmonogamous people (of which there are plenty). And if that is unacceptable to them, they are asking how to have a monogamous relationship with a sexual person without having to have sex, and the answer is you don't except by making them miserable and being an asshole.

The second LW, your parents are assholes and you probably should have cut them out of your life if they treat you like that. You're an adult and responsible for yourself, and expecting your asshole parents to pay for your living expenses and telling them they should be nicer to you about it is ridiculous. Regardless how unreasonable their price is, that's what it is and you have all the freedom in the world to reject it. And you should! Because agreeing to it and then lying, doing all the things they forbid, is scummy. Either accept not dating and not boozing as your cost of living (without complaint, as many would take that offer happily!), or pay for your own cost of living and be glad you ever had the choice.
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Feb 8 TheRob commented on Savage Love.
"I'm think the furry scene is pretty hot, and I'd like to go explore some furry sex. So let's say as long as we're in a furry costume, we can fuck ofher people?"

"I'm not into furries, but I'd love to get involved in some BDSM stuff, since you aren't into that."

"No, that would be cheating. It's only allowed if you go for exactly what I am into."

However LW1 is exploring her sexuality, she's doing it with another person. Wanting to open their relationship up ONLY in the context of how she would benefit is shitty.
Dec 27, 2016 TheRob commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Scenes From a Marriage.
"Are you being fulfilled sexually? I'm not, and it's not fair. Let's discuss some solutions to that, but let me be clear: me continuing to give you blowjobs with nothing in return is not a solution and will not continue. Want some ideas from me to get the ball rolling, or did you want to start?"
Sep 20, 2016 TheRob commented on Savage Love.
@SNIP It is entirely your guy's perogative if he wants to get his junk cut on, and if you are pressuring him, you're being an asshole. I understand if you don't want kids, but in the very unlikely case of condom malfunction followed by the even more unlikely case it results in a pregnancy, and the even more unlikely case all that happens AND she doesn't want to abort or place for adoption, he still has to decide if he wants to take an active role in the kid's life. And just because he takes an active role in it doesn't mean you have to. And if, after ALL OF THOSE unlikely scenarios happen, and he DOES expect you to take an active role in his kid's life, THEN you will have the same opportunity to leave with the now understandable reason that you never wanted kids and made it clear from the onset that you didn't.

But until you reach that point, calm your ass down and stop being a controlling bitch. Stop micromanaging someone else's life.
Jul 26, 2016 TheRob commented on I, Anonymous.
Been pepper sprayed, can confirm, your wife would be a blubbering mess. Can't open your eyes, everything that generates mucus goes into overdrive, and you are desperately trying to catch your breath while avoiding breathing in any of it. Oh, and the pain. You go into full-on panic mode, unless you're one of the random people it doesn't really affect.

Btw, not a rapist or stalker, I had to carry it for work and somebody had the bright idea that if you have to carry it, you should have to get hit with it first.
Jul 12, 2016 TheRob commented on Savage Love.
"I committed myself to this person" does not extend to "I committed myself to this person regardless of how poorly they treat me" and does not diminish that commitment when the other party completely betrays the trust inherent in the relationship. Dropping someone because of cheating (especially egregious ongoing cheating) is absolutely not "committing to the ideal" and not a commitment to the person. It is possible to move past it, but doing so (or not) has no reflection on the wronged party's commitment. That's bullshit, Dan.
Feb 3, 2016 TheRob commented on I, Anonymous.
Sounds like he was heating up his back burner because the crazy person he was with (but was having too good of sex to end it with) was on their way out. Not very nice, definitely, but having been in the position of the one putting up with that nonsense (crying on a beach daily on a family camping trip? Sounds like Christmas with my ex!), I can understand his position.
Feb 2, 2016 TheRob commented on Seattle Times' Treatment of Musician Hollis Wong-Wear Is a Perfect Example of #JournalismSoWhite.
So if it were a white person who collaborated on an album with the much more famous Macklemore, it would have been okay to use the word sidekick as within the context, that is an appropriate comparison, but if the person is Asian, it is racist, even in the exact same context? That sounds pretty knee-jerk.
Jan 6, 2016 TheRob commented on I, Anonymous.
@DavidinShoreline Do you ever pull a muscle patting yourself on the back so much? Or do you get plenty of strength training climbing on your high horse?

May as well tell miners that they shouldn't work underground if they don't want to die in a cave-in, not that their conditions should be improved. Or tell soldiers they shouldn't join the military if they don't want to die when they are given non-bullet-resistant humvees and inadequate equipment.