Aug 13, 2014 Jupiter commented on Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?.
Let me toss in a woman's perspective here, so we're not just talking about whether or not men are capable of monogamy. Certainly some people are monogamous and some aren't. I'm in the latter group. I've cheated in every relationship I've been in, even managing to do so in an open relationship.

I'm not going to generalize about anyone else's relationship, but in mine, the adage holds true.
Sep 12, 2012 Jupiter commented on Savage Love.
CIGGG: Hookah might be a good alternative, if his fetish doesn't specifically deal with cigarettes. The smoke passes through water, which cools it and eliminates a lot of the harshness. It comes in fun flavors, and there are a lot of varieties of shisha that don't contain tobacco (I've smoked shishas made of tea leaves and sugar cane) if you have health concerns. If you're interested, hookah-shisha.com is an excellent website, with both a shop and a hookah education blog.
Sep 11, 2012 Jupiter commented on SL Letter of the Day: Wedded Miss.
Three months is pretty early, but I wouldn't say that a couple NEVER should discuss marriage until a certain point. That doesn't seem to be the issue for this couple. The issue seems to be that the LW's boyfriend was dishonest about his intentions from the start ("I asked if everything he'd said before was empty talk, and he said yes"), then finally came clean about it right after they decided to move in together, and then refused to discuss it.

It doesn't matter if they had been dating for three months or three years before they started discussing marriage; the boyfriend is in the wrong. If he wanted a woman to live with but not marry, that's perfectly fine. There are a lot of people who are very happy with that arrangement. But needs to be open and upfront about what he wants, not trick his girlfriend into accepting a situation that she doesn't want.

I hope she ended up deciding not to move in with him!
Aug 17, 2012 Jupiter commented on SL Letter of the Day: Maybe More Vanilla Than I Thought.
He won't even read up on how to give you an orgasm, or even consider one of your fantasies, but expects you to indulge all of his? And on top of that, five years of very little sex, with refusals any time you tried to initiate? It sounds like he doesn't care about your sexual fulfillment at all. I'd suggest you either DTMFA or--if he's a decent guy outside of the bedroom--open up the relationship so that you can find a sexual partner who's willing to get you off.
Aug 6, 2012 Jupiter commented on SL Letter of the Day: If You Don't Take a Chance, Nothing Happens.
One other idea, since you say you're worried about monogamy: have an open relationship.

I can't do monogamy, and I avoided a lot of relationships because of it. I didn't avoid them outright, though, or make the decision without any of their input. I made it clear from the start to anyone who showed an interest in me that I was unwilling to be monogamous. Only the ones who were okay with that were considered for a relationship.

As long as you're upfront about it, there shouldn't be any hard feelings (unless the guy is immature, and you don't want to end up with a guy who can't handle your honest feelings anyway).
Aug 1, 2012 Jupiter commented on Savage Love.
WHACK - I agree with all of the other commenters who are suggesting Google Chrome. Incognito mode is a fantastic feature. My husband and I watch porn together, so it's not a matter of clearing my history for his sake, but of making sure porn sites don't pop up in the address bar when I'm using the computer when someone else is around. (For example, if my parents come to visit and I want to show them something on the computer.)

When I used Firefox, I just used bookmarks and didn't keep a history. That was a few years ago, though, so I'm sure Firefox has some similar feature now.
Jun 29, 2012 Jupiter commented on Are You a Queer Women Who Dates "Women and Trans Men"?.
I understand where the writer is coming from (persons who are born female but identify as male probably don't want to be lumped in to the category "women") but disagree with the overall premise and tone. How does she get to decide the sexual identity of others? Didn't she just spend several paragraphs talking about how we need to accept the gender identities of trans people?
Jun 29, 2012 Jupiter joined My Stranger Face