Nov 26, 2014 Reticula commented on SL Letter of the Day: Sticking to the Point.
I'll add my plea to let this topic fade away and never return. The answer was obvious, and now that it's been given and given again, there's no need to even think about it again. Move on.
Nov 24, 2014 Reticula commented on SL Letter of the Day: Profile & Courage.
"Some men in your position try correct for this problem, their particular disadvantage, by not revealing that they're marred and in open relationship until after they've gone on a date or two with a woman they met via OKCupid. A person who wouldn't date a hypothetical married man in an open relationship may feel differently after they've gotten to know a particular married man. It's a little manipulative but I don't think it rises to the level of dishonest assholery—not if the disclose comes soon after meeting and definitely before sex."

I strongly disagree. It does rise to the level of dishonest assholery. It's manipulative and cruel to lie about your relationship status just so you can get laid outside of your marriage, and let's make no mistake: he's not looking for dates. He wants to get laid. I usually agree with your advice, and you gave some good tips this time. This one wasn't one of them.

This guy has already found out most single women don't want to fake date married men. In other words, most single women don't want to be his fuck on the side. That's our choice. If men don't care, that's their choice too. Let them fuck all the married women who will have them. Playing dishonest games with women who are looking for more than a married man's night out though is purely an asshole move. His dick is not more important than a woman's personal rule about not dating or fucking married men. Period.
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Sep 26, 2014 Reticula commented on SL Letter of the Day: Down the Road.
So your girlfriend is yet another one of those halves of a committed relationship who wants to go out and find single people she can have sex with and yet still maintain the safety of her relationship with you so nobody can put any of the normal expectations of a real relationship on her? They're ubiquitous. Their desire to fulfill their sexual needs at the expense of everyone else is simply tiresome. As a single person who wants to be more than a fuck to somebody eventually, I find people like your girlfriend increasingly intolerable. She's an asshole. Find somebody nice.
Feb 20, 2013 Reticula commented on Savage Love.
Have to disagree with you on the engagement ring. If he wants to wear a $1000 engagement ring, he should get one for himself. If she has to wear something on her finger 24 hours every day, she should be able to choose the rock. Otherwise, he's just putting his mark on her.
Oct 15, 2012 Reticula commented on Savage Love.
I can't believe you advised a woman to lie to her SO about being pregnant. You lost some respect points with me for that one. Lying about being pregnant is a repugnant act that no ethical woman should ever choose. Our ability to create a child within our bodies is a sacred trust, and it should not be used to mind fuck our partners.

Maybe you read a different letter from the one I read. I read that the boyfriend is against abortion; he believes the potential of the fetus is as important as the life of a baby. Lots of people believe that, even those of us who are pro choice. I did not read that he's against a woman's right to choose abortion. There's a big difference. Opinion vs legislation. Huge.

Let me make one thing clear: I am a pro-choice feminist, and I absolutely defend any woman's right to choose abortion. This is about intentional deception and emotional manipulation, not about abortion rights.

You fucked this one up so bad.
Sep 11, 2012 Reticula updated the link to his or her website.
Sep 11, 2012 Reticula joined My Stranger Face
Sep 11, 2012 Reticula joined My Stranger Face
Sep 11, 2012 Reticula commented on Savage Love.
This was one of your best columns. Great response to HBM. He needs to be honest about his insecurities, even if they do seem contradictory. A healthier path would be to nurture the social aspects of their relationship that he feels left out of.

And the idea of mutually agreeing to withhold sex is brilliant. Imagine the teasing....

Thanks for a good read today.