Feb 24 Haley commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Being A Couple & Sleeping in Separate Beds Is Cool, Too.
I've been married for 15 years and we've had separate bedrooms for about 12 of them, mostly because of my husband's snoring. People have always told us that this is bad for our relationship, our sex life, and damaging to our children. However, we both sleep better and fight less (getting woken up constantly by the other can really create resentment) when we have our separate places. So far our kids don't seem to be traumatized, either.
Jan 11 Haley commented on Savage Love.
BREEDER reminds me of those people who go to the T. Rex Cafe or Chuck E. Cheese and then leave horrible reviews because the place was noisy and full of children.
Nov 2, 2016 Haley commented on Savage Love.
It may be a mistake to specifically seek out women who appear dominant in life. Just as assertive women in leadership positions often like to be dominated in the bedroom because it provides a relaxing change of pace from being in charge all the time, I know a few meeker-seeming housewives/nannies/librarians who are very dominant sexually. When much of your time is spent caring for others, or working in a submissive job where other peoples' needs are the priority and you have to be polite all the time, a partner who encourages you to be dominant and even a little selfish can be very appealing. The quiet ones can surprise you!
Sep 29, 2016 Haley commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: A Tweet Storm of Excellent Advice.
In my experience (straight female), the thing that "nice guys" don't seem to understand is that women know what they're about. The main difference between a "nice guy" and a "jerk" is that the jerk is generally honest about his intentions, and has a take-it-or-leave-it attitude, while the nice guy beats around the bush, waiting to be rewarded for his kindness with a sexual relationship. It seems manipulative; we know perfectly well what Mr. Nice Guy wants, and that he's trying to set up a quid-pro-quo situation where we end up owing him for all the favors he did (that we didn't ask for) or the stuff he insisted on paying for (that we tried to turn down). These suspicions are usually borne out when we finally tell the "nice guy" we're not interested and he freaks out and points out how nice he's been and how unfair it is that he's not getting what he essentially feels he paid for.
Aug 22, 2016 Haley commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Sexy Business Tips.
I have a friend who works in a shop in Maine, with a focus toward female customers. They do occasionally have problems when men come in pretending to shop, while actually watching women shop for sex toys. It creeps real customers out and drives them away. One guy even followed a woman out of the store and harassed her (though he thought he was being helpful, apparently believing women only buy toys when they don't have "the real thing"). This place doesn't ban unaccompanied men from the store, but I can see how some shops might get to that point.
Jun 24, 2016 Haley commented on Who Sent the Dumbest Tweet in Reaction to Brexit?.
Oh, and I think it gets overlooked that there were xenophobic motivations on both sides. Ukip gets all the press for being the racist shitbags (and they are), but some people voted Remain because leaving means immigration checkpoints will move to Dover and Folkestone from Calais, and many didn't want thousands of asylum seekers actually coming to the UK.
Jun 24, 2016 Haley commented on Who Sent the Dumbest Tweet in Reaction to Brexit?.
@15, I can't speak to the motivations of originalcinner's relatives for voting Leave, but I also have relatives in the UK that voted this way, and not for any concern over immigration. Britain was being outvoted more often than any other EU country when it came to budget and foreign policy; it seemed to many people that the $ was going out (along with all the other restrictions required by EU membership), and British interests were not being taken seriously. For example, being an island nation, Britain is far more affected by EU common fisheries policies than most EU nations, but real and costly concerns are ignored. Lots of $ is being spent in ways the British citizens don't want to fund (the "travelling circus") being a prime example. Ironically, the English were upset about being treated this way by the EU, when it is quite comparable to the way Scotland and Northern Ireland have been treated by England. (And I have Scottish relatives who do want to stay in the EU, but are not unhappy that this vote will give them another shot at doing so as an independent nation, and that we might also see a unified Ireland.)
More...
May 6, 2016 Haley commented on SL Letter of the Day: In The Neighborhood.
I don't think the LW ever really considered this relationship being open on both sides. His wife's libido was low, she was considerably overweight, and for a whole year she stayed monogamous while he had a relationship with someone else. He probably felt pretty confident that he wouldn't have to worry about her having another partner, much less dropping the weight and having several. I strongly suspect that his willingness to agree to an open relationship was a belief that, in practice at least, it would only really apply to him.
Apr 29, 2016 Haley commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Undercutting Remarks.
So the LW had a side mullet first and was trying to grow it out, and the girlfriend was about to get a side mullet but hadn't yet, and it's the LW who was accused of "copying"? I don't care how dumb the fight was, I'd have had to debate that one.
Apr 17, 2016 Haley commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Strap-On Tools.
@38, I agree completely. A lot of straight men are really good at seeing what they're hoping to see and make some bad assumptions. (If we smile and have tits at the same time, we're "flirting".) I think this woman will be more than a little surprised/upset if she gets an email like the one Dan has suggested. Unless she has explicitly come out and said so, I doubt she is seeing a friendly reunion with Mr. I-Haven't-Take-Care-of-Myself as an "opportunity" for "memorable" sex.