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PineStreetBomber
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Apr 8 PineStreetBomber commented on Police Beat: The Skin You're In.
If you can't check your blood sugar and administer a proper dose of insulin when you're drunk you've got no business drinking as a diabetic in the first place. If the paramedics ever have to come do it for me, I'm throwing in the towel and going sober.
Aug 19, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on To Tip Your Server or Not to Tip Your Server: That Is Not the Question.
To all the people who are insisting that serving isn't that hard: I'd like to see you try. If you think you can give good service after getting quintuple-sat, with no support staff, and a psychotic owner screaming obscenities at you in front of your tables, I'd like to see you fucking try. I can do it. I can still smile at the cheap ass students who always leave me the change on their 9.14 tab. I can still discuss the finer points of the menu with indecisive drunk people at 1am. I can split your check six ways and put the wine on your bill and the dessert on their bill and not tell you to get a fucking calculator and do it yourself. When you ask for a cappuccino that's light on foam, I can just bite my tongue and make you a latte instead of calling attention to your ineptitude. I can endure the endless calls of "Hey, waiter!" Sure, sometimes I have to go in the walk-in and breathe deeply and slowly for a minute or two, but I can still do it. Can you? I doubt it.
Apr 30, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on Drunk of the Week.
The other night at Westlake, my skateboarding was impeded by a strange multicolored glass object sitting on the planter. This turned out to be a rather large, blown-glass dildo, covered in Westlake's omnipresent slime and trash. It being Westlake, I just let it wash over me and kept skating. That is, until a passing meth enthusiast unwittingly picked it up and examined it. After a few puzzled moments, the general murmur of the horrified onlookers reached the ears of the unfortunate gutter-dildo examiner. This person's face at the moment they realized what, exactly, they were holding is not one I'll soon forget.
Apr 21, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on Breaking Up Is Hard to Do.
@8 I think you're missing the point of printed zines.

I sincerely hope someone finds ZAPP a space, because there are plenty of treasures to be appreciated there. My favorite has to be the book-length, spiral-bound chronicle of a man's forays into the deep jungle in Southeast Asia after the death of his best friend. His notes are fucking crazy...everything from how to catch shrimp and survive on oatmeal for a week to three-hour-long solo yoga sessions. He was on some serious spiritual journey shit. Also, he mailed his oversized zine to ZAPP unsolicited solely because of its reputation, which is a great argument in favor of its preservation. Where else will all the world's strange lost souls send their manifestos and journals? Where else can you find a zine by Australian youths dedicated to exploring underground tunnels in Perth? An interview with the Faction transcribed in sketchy handwriting about getting in a fight with some kids at their show? Etc, etc, etc...
Apr 20, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on There's a New Old Park in the Neighborhood.
One man's uninhabited corporate plaza is another man's skatepark. Except builders are a lot less likely to put skate stoppers on a tree trunk than a nice piece of marble!
Feb 12, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on Should All City Coffee Have Fired the Bitter Barista?.
I realize that being a customer servant is not the grand calling most people imagined for themselves, but if you feel utterly put upon merely from the sight of someone's bicycle helmet mirror or price complaint and you need to tweet about it perhaps you're not cut out for the job? Because people ARE going to do way more fucked up shit than that, and if you're struggling with the little cringe-inducing stuff, you're gonna have a really hard time when someone actually flips out.
Jan 17, 2013 PineStreetBomber commented on The Grilled Cheese Challenge.
@5 Clearly a pseudonym to protect the writer from the wrath of grilled cheese truck owners who disagree with this review.
Oct 26, 2012 PineStreetBomber joined My Stranger Face
Oct 26, 2012 PineStreetBomber joined My Stranger Face
Oct 26, 2012 PineStreetBomber commented on More Halloween Candy!.
As a type 1 diabetic, I generally avoid candy, but I tasted some anyway in the name of journalism. The chocolates on the left were full of excessively sweet raspberry creme, which caused me to immediately seek a trash can. The white chocolate pecan thing on the right, however, was ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DELICIOUS and so worth the insulin.
 
 

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