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Dec 11, 2012 Treasach joined My Stranger Face
Dec 11, 2012 Treasach joined My Stranger Face
Dec 11, 2012 Treasach commented on Savage Love.
So the general comments seem to be variants of the following themes.

"I'm not that, so this isn't important. Let's move on."

"I've never met any (that came out to me about their initiate lifestyle), so it isn't important. Let's move on."

"Quibbling over terminology, like we are actual experts on sexuality and entomology and human evolution. Now I'm bored. Let's move on."

"How dare those assholes say they are hard-wired for something and can't have a proper relationship without it! We all manage."

"It doesn't make any difference whether they have this identity or not. It only negatively affects their lives and families because they are pervs.."

"I can't imagine how that would work equitably and without harm. Therefore, it can't and must not be a good idea."

"I want to marry (an object, an animal, an idea.) Therefore, that's my sexual identity. I'm dismissing the entire idea with my unique cleverness. Let's move on."

You'll all notice, I trust, that each and every one of those arguments has been used to discredit the LBGT communities insistence on recognizing and legitimizing their sexual identities. And I say identities for a reason, because orientation doesn't apply to trans, which IS included. Those who self-identified as TS or TV are not required to be attracted to any gender in particular. It is entirely their *sexual identity* that is supported by the community.

The reason you are all getting so angry, or pretending to be bored in an attempt to suppress, even though you bothered to write in about it, is because you know that poly is a sexual identity. The letters prove it; the responses prove it. The same tired and invalid arguments are used against it, the same impotent and irrational anger at a lifestyle the posters claim not to even share but still need to be upset about, all the while knowing that other identifies are included in the Community that have nothing to do with whom one is attracted to.

Those of you who are in fact poly and felt forced into the mono culture around us have alot of anger, and much invested in the status quo. Like many of the homos in the last century, you need to lash out against those who are freely expressing that sexuality and rocking the boat in a way that you are jealous of and feel you can't have. And get them to shut the hel up and stop sticking it in your face. And why should they have any fun if you can't? Need proof? How about this theme running through the comments?

"Men need other partners, but we've been forced to accept only one in our society, so suck it up, buttercups. Let's move on."

Poly is an identity. We form communities, we raise our children, and we sometimes have to fight to keep all those. Yes, it's about relationships *and* sex and family, same as an orientation. Like LBGT orientations and trans-identities, or intersexed, we will be recognized, because it is justified, and our lives depend on it. We will do it all by ourselves if we have to, with or without your help, but we would prefer to have it. If we can't count on you, at least don't be piss on us like the rest of this culture. You, like them, will be on the wrong side of history.