Nov 14 MN commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Strep Right Up.
I had my tonsils removed when I was 25. The two weeks after surgery sucked. The years since the surgery have been great. No more strep! Your guy should find a doctor who is serious about pain management and get those things out. He can't seriously want to be the strep Typhoid Mary.
Jun 22 MN commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Target Engaged.
I love living with my husband. However, I also loved living by myself, and had no interest in changing that unless we were making our relationship permanent. Happily, we were and are on the same page. I don't have any issue with anyone else living together before/instead of marriage, and I have lived with a couple of boyfriends in the past. I am not picking up anyone else's socks again, never mind signing a mortgage with a romantic partner, unless commitment and jewelry are involved. If that's how the LW feels, s/he doesn't have to justify it to me or anyone else.
Oct 14, 2015 MN commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Column A and Column B.
He moved in to *your* place? And now his behavior has you thinking about leaving your own apartment? Because he is negatively affecting your health by polluting your air--I'm going to pay you the courtesy of thinking that you know more about your own lungs than a bunch of strangers do--and because he smells bad enough to turn your stomach? It's time for him to go. You can keep dating him, if you want, while he lives somewhere else, vapes somewhere else, and works out his dental problems, somewhere else.
Jul 13, 2015 MN commented on The Summer I Got Drugged—Maybe.
Um, you know, being drugged by strangers is scary even if you are a naive waif.
Dec 2, 2014 MN commented on SL Letter of the Day: Zoning Violation.
Oh the places I have vaguely parked my eyes while thinking! It's good to know that I'm not alone, honestly. I'm not traumatized by any fabric patterns and the receptionist is not my preferred romantic-sexual flavor, and I still totally could have done this.

I think the receptionist is overreacting. She could just as easily have some lunch on her shirt as be the victim of harassment in this situation.
Nov 28, 2014 MN commented on SL Letter of the Day: Criminal in Canada.
Just one question: How close was your wife to coming when you passed out?
Sep 2, 2014 MN commented on Savage Love.
Before SHIT goes for any of the options Dan listed, he might find out what happened eleven years ago, and strongly encourage his wife to get a complete physical. Maybe the problem isn't fixable, in which case, yeah, those are your options. But there might be something medical going on that can be treated. Worth a try, no?
Aug 19, 2014 MN commented on Savage Love.
Is refusing to discuss the topic with MIL and never inviting her over again an option? Whether the wife will inherit or not, I get not wanting to sever relations with a parent, even a very difficult one. (I have some experience on the subject.) But I can't see any need at all for this woman (the MIL) to ever darken the LW's doorstep again.
Jul 4, 2014 MN commented on SL Letter of the Day: Smoke Her Out.
I'm with Alison, too. I don't smoke pot, but I have plenty of friends who do. In the absence of a medical problem that made daily pot use desirable, a sweetie could smoke two or three times a month without raising my hackles. Every day or something close to it would be a deal-breaker.

I'm not in middle management, I don't have a smack-addicted brother, and I think I'm pretty curious. But it doesn't really matter whether I'm an intolerant bore or not. A frequent weed-smoker and I wouldn't be a good match.
Jun 23, 2014 MN commented on SL Letter of the Day: Flawed Parents-In-Law.
I don't feel that I am doing my kid any favors if I teach him that it is okay for other people, including his grandparents, to abuse me. What does it tell him about what he should accept from people who claim to love him? What does it teach him about how he should treat me? Or his potential future girlfriends, boyfriends, spouses, children, friends, pets, you name it?

Total estrangement is of course the nuclear option, but I feel very comfortable saying "you will treat me and my family with as much politeness as you would use to talk with the person who cuts your hair or bags your groceries. If you're not feeling up to that (rather low) bar, then we'll look forward to seeing you another time." Repeat as necessary. Go home early, say goodbye and hang up the phone as necessary, and otherwise decline to engage. Either they'll decide to act like civilized people or they'll keep acting like jerks--but the choice is theirs.