Jun 25, 2013
commented on Ken Hoinsky, Author of Controversial "Seduction Guide" Funded Via Kickstarter, Apologizes
It's been fascinating watching the reactions to this story: so many knee jerk reactions and people making false assumptions... There is a perception that PUA stuff is all mind-games creepy men use to trick women (or attempt to) into sex. To be sure, there is some awful shit out there - and one need not have any credentials to become a self-proclaimed expert and start running seminars. There is also a lot of material out there that contains good advice, and is really self-help oriented: aimed at helping men reduce their anxiety in expressing romantic interest, developing confidence and self-worth, and not putting women on a pedestal but recognizing women are human beings who also want sex and relationships. It's funny to me to see the accusations that PUA = treating women as objects, cardboard cutouts, because that's the exact opposite of a lot of the material I've come across. I think people tend to share the most scandalous content, and then people assume that's representative of the whole. PUA reading can be a bridge to helping a guy improve his life, which will then improve his dating life. A lot of it is like a form of marketed therapy.
I find the PUA community really interesting from a sociological perspective, and have read a fair amount. Curious to see how it started, I later read "The Game" and found much of it to be repellent. The content you'll find nowadays is different than ten years ago - there is a focus on being "natural" rather than using "routines" - which is to say students are encouraged to develop themselves, expand their tiny comfort zone (ie. leave the apartment/computer) and experience more of life. Some men need the motivation of women to start doing these things and then find they are much happier for doing them - and let's face it, you're more likely to be successful in dating if you are happy to begin with rather than looking for someone to make you happy.
Jun 4, 2013
commented on Who's the Bigger Dick Here?
Why did Paul feel the need to incite an argument about gender politics in a stupid poll about some movie? I'm starting to cringe whenever I see "Feminist" or "MRA" in an article, because the way some people argue in comments belies their view that everything is a zero-sum game; that addressing valid complaints by men marginalizes women, and vice-versa. And then there's all the name-calling... blech