Still Thinking
Urban PNW
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Figuring it out as I go. Generally like people, but also need my alone time.

8:22 PM yesterday Still Thinking commented on Savage Love.
To be clear - I am happy to do mind my best to give a hand job. I just 1) don't feel very skilled at it, 2) don't feel like I get enough information about the recipient's level of pleasure from it, 3) don't feel I can communicate my enjoyment of my partner's body as well through it. And, my guys have nearly always orgasmed, or got closer to an orgasm, from my blow job (I know, I know, this is not the only measure of pleasure), whereas I don't recall any of them coming as the result of my hand job.

Guys - anyone object to getting a blow job rather than a hand job?
Aug 25 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love.
Ahh, the handjob. I find it very difficult to only use my hand(s) - my mouth always wants in on the action. I feel a stronger connection to my partner through my lips and tongue - hands feel rather distant and removed. I feel like I get more information about what my partner is enjoying via my lips and tongue - my hands aren't as sensitive. And saliva is a very handy lubricant - the best hands can do in that department is sweat, and I've never worked up a palm sweat yet.

CMD - I appreciate the details at #56.

Philophile - thinking about this concept of close busing. I don't think I would really want to continue dating someone who was getting me almost there, while also casually dating other people. I can't figure out why yet, but that's why I'm thinking.
Aug 24 Still Thinking commented on SL Letter of the Day: Asexuality-It's a Thing..
Add me to the chorus of those-in-agreement-with-Ricardo.
Aug 23 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love.
LW #1 - the sentence that stood out to me was "It feels lonelier than when I was single." That feeling, all by itself, would be a good enough reason to gently let this gentleman go. Dudes in their 40's and above can have difficulties with getting/maintaining erections, and there are plenty of other things to do besides PIV. But if no PIV is a deal breaker, and he's honestly tried at least a couple of solutions to his problem - and they haven't worked - then you've got another solid reason to break up. If he won't try, ditto.

LW #2 - I call humblebrag. So I understand that if you're 26, you may not be flush with cash. I like the solution of her buying the harness that fits/feels good to her, and you buying the dildo that fits/feels good to you.

LW #3 - unsure what relevance her being Native and you being Caucasian has to the matter in hand (pun intended). You guys don't sound happy together. Break up.
Aug 17 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Daddy's Pretend Girl Worried About Daddy's Actual Girl.
How many commenters here have a horse in this race anyway?
Aug 3 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love.
@ Ricardo 45 - is it being underage, or being a choirboy, that neutralizes the DNA?
@ CMD 46 - is that your take on rendering unto G-d that which is G-d's and rendering to Caesar that which is Caesar's?
@ Ricardo 47 - is that the regular size, or the deluxe? And doesn't holding a ceremony outside the church invalidate the ceremony?
@ Auntie Griz 48 - please find a friend to hang out with until this wave of depression passes over. And call a crisis line if it gets any worse. See a counselor. Don't get stuck in the place you are describing right now.
Aug 3 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Back To the Dorms.
Both sound like poor planners. They didn't say - Hey! Let's see if this is still working by a week before the deadline to move back into the dorms. Or Hey! How does living together impact your finances and my finances?

Pookie can't afford an apartment on her own? Join the club, and move in with roommates.
Aug 3 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The Men In Her Life.
unhealthy relationships all round
Aug 3 Still Thinking commented on Savage Love.
Love "drink only tea, snort only in derision and use only condoms religiously." Waitaminit, how do you use a condom religiously? I mean, which religion is that?
Jul 28 Still Thinking commented on SL Letter of the Day: Unicorn Hunters.
Fungal doesn't necessarily want a relationship with this couple. She's just unclear how to proceed in new territory where she might not want a relationship in the way she has had them with past boyfriends.