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Luluisme
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May 21 Luluisme commented on SL Letter of the Day: Fuck On It.
@11, that's a tad harsh for successful non-monogamy. As @9 said, its not about how you feel, its about how you act. This goes for lots of crummy (and good) emotions.

Sure, someone with a low jealousy threshold will have an easier time of non-monogamy, but as long as you don't make your partner feel bad for something that's not in that person's control, then you're off to a good start. When people do new things, sometimes that's scary. Doesn't mean it wasn't a good thing, or that it will always feel scary.
Apr 2 Luluisme commented on Savage Love.
NCA, you feel how you feel. If how you feel isn't attracted, then best to let the man down gently.

If you're not ready to break up with him, for whatever reason, then try to simplify: Do things that sound fun to you right now with him, even if that's easing off sex for a little while, and focusing on the non-sex things you were enjoying the last three months. Gently (or firmly, as appropriate) say no to things you are not enjoying. Give yourself time to get used to this, for you, new aspect of your guy.

Good luck to you!
Jan 29 Luluisme commented on Kshama Sawant to Take Home $40,000 in Pay out of her $117,000 City Council Salary.
@32 - no need to start making nasty comments about my city. I like living in Philly just fine, and I'm not the only one.

fwiw, I agree with you that this debate about median incomes is kinda strange frankly. I mean Brooklyn is a _part_ of NYC. And Philadelphia has a much bigger population than Seattle. I'm not sure what anyone gets by comparing these things except maybe confused.
Dec 10, 2013 Luluisme commented on What Do You Think of the Jupiter Ascending and Godzilla Trailers?.
@7 o-O sigh. So, you're saying no one gets to put Ligeti in a movie ever again because 2001 snatched him up first? What about Strauss' Blue Danube? The funny thing about artists and creators is that they have this tendency to reference prior works. I'll grant that Also Sprach Zarathustra might be a smidge iconic to be used without it being clearly a reference, but I'm guessing you don't think it was bad form of Kubrick to use something 70 years old at the time and already well loved by people familiar with German orchestral works.
Mar 6, 2013 Luluisme commented on Savage Love.
@10. I noticed the new interviews too. I thought it was great that you re-visited to get more info for the original poster.
Mar 4, 2013 Luluisme commented on SL Letter of the Day: Flirting vs. Negotiating.
@SUBS, sorry this thing freaked you out and drudged up some (sounds like pretty horribly) bad memories. If you don't trust the guy, then that's probably a deal breaker for certain types of play. If you think you might be able to trust the guy, but are feeling nervous, try to sort out what you'd need from him in order to have a good time. If it's unfixable, it'd be polite to let him know, but either way move on. But if it's fixable, work with him on it. If you're serious about getting into D/s, I'd say you might want to figure out a way to let people know (early-ish) this is a serious trigger for you so they don't accidentally step on it, in the same way you might tell someone about a physical injury that would inhibit activities. It's not a bad thing to say: hey, there's some soreness over here. Go easy or I'll have to stop.

As a side note re: why...
I don't think she has to explain why she doesn't like something, if she doesn't want to. That you don't like it is the important thing. That being said, context can be one (of several) handy and quick ways to get a hard-limit sorted out fairly quickly. So, SUBS, you may find mentioning your background a useful technique when you're at the negotiating stage, if it hasn't come up before. Good luck!
More...
Feb 27, 2013 Luluisme commented on Savage Love.
@37 @63 I think you might find the following helpful re: the word assignment, and its usage here
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_assignm…
Jan 30, 2013 Luluisme commented on Savage Love.
@13 I don't think SAD constitutes a recursive acronym because the word "sad" has its own meaning, unlike say GNU, which refers to its own acronym in order to define itself, hence the recursion.

I wouldn't call it cheating, but it _is_ kinda lame.
Jun 13, 2012 Luluisme commented on Slog Poll: Am I a Disgusting Freak?.
+1 for @14's boiling water alternative.
May 19, 2012 Luluisme commented on SL Letter of the Day: Show This Woman Some Love.
Oh, VABG, I'm so sorry your family hurt you. Give yourself the space to grieve. Its like you lost them all over again. Some days you'll want a bit of judicious wallowing. Other days, dust off your hands and go do something distracting and fun (with the nephew too?). The ratio of good days and bad days will shift. It will.

and +1 on the get yourself a lawyer.
 

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