Forthepowderroom
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Oct 6, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: She Can't Unread That.
Really Dan? Don't write down negative things about people you are dating sounds a lot like don't take naked pictures of yourself if you don't want someone to hack your phone and put them all over the Internet. But I don't recall you taking the latter position.
May 29, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Supreme Court Poised to Fuck Urban America.
How are they going to count "eligible voters?" The census counts everyone (or tries to). I don't remember seeing "Are you a felon?" on the census form. If this changes, they'll have to change the census (a bad idea, because then we really won't know what our population is), or create a new census just for counting "eligible voters."
May 6, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Woman Sues Homosexuals in Federal Court—All Homosexuals.
Of course she's representing herself. No lawyer would touch this frivolous piece of garbage with a ten foot pole (well, except for maybe what's-her-name Phelps). See @11 above for a summary of the major deficiencies. Also, who the hell are the defendants? How is she gonna serve "the homosexuals" with process? Even if she did manage to get that far, a 6th grader could get this thing dismissed for failure to state a claim.
May 6, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The New Girl.
@4 I don't think so. It sounded fake to me too.
Apr 1, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The Secret to Success.
I really don't mean to be a dick here but...if you're in law school, you don't have time for marathon 6 hour sex anyway (unless maybe you are a graduating 3L who doesn't care about your grades, and that's all about to change as bar prep begins, which depending on what state you're in, can be the worst two and a half months of your life). You also don't have the time and energy for a relationship that has you running circles in your head like this. It sounds like your partner has his own issues, if he won't even accept your reassurances. Good luck to you.
Mar 12, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on SL Letter of the Day: Sure You Don't..
Looks like no one (including Dan) caught the part about this being the LW's first serious relationship. The LW is young, naive, has unrealistic expectations, and made a rookie mistake.
Feb 26, 2015 Forthepowderroom commented on Shitty People in Shitty Places Working to Make Shitty Places Shittier.
Those first two sound a lot like the Colorado law struck down in Romer v. Evans, so I doubt they'll last. Maybe the state funds wasted in trying to defend them will deter other states from doing something similar.
Dec 17, 2014 Forthepowderroom commented on SL Letters of the Day: A Foursome.
@17: By proliferating, I meant in the strict definition of the word - "increasing rapidly." I see the primary/secondary language getting tossed around more and more in writing and talk about poly relationships, and in particular from Dan. I think it's troublesome, because it operates from the assumption that that's what poly "is." I'm in a poly relationship, and have several friends who are as well. Fewer of them label their relationships as "primary" or secondary" than who simply refer to their partners as partners, husbands/wives, girl/boyfriends, etc.

@Akbar and @Cat in fez: I have the same issue. I would never want to refer to a partner as "secondary" or be referred to that way because it implies "less than."

Also, there does seem to be a correlation between using those terms and having come into poly from a preexisting mono relationship. In some cases, maybe the terms don't really define the relationships in terms of rank, but came into play because they provided emotional comfort to the original partner who agreed to open things up.

I agree with @51 - use the terms if they work for you, but for the love of God let's keep them off of our beautiful polyester banners. You're not "doing it wrong" if none of your partners is "primary" or "secondary." You're just doing it the way you do it.
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Dec 17, 2014 Forthepowderroom commented on "Rape Exceptionalism" and Protecting Law Students from "Triggers".
"Victims of sexual assault actually need lawyers, prosecutors, and judges who are familiar with the relevant law." Absolutely. And they are not getting that in law school, because that's not what law school is really about.

Law school isn't really about teaching you the relevant law of your jurisdiction. It's about teaching you how to analyze and "think" like a lawyer. In practice, you are constantly researching and looking things up. You're not relying on whatever it is you learned in law school, which is often a mishmash of general principles that may not even be the law in your state. Hell, the bar exam might not even test you on the relevant law of your jurisdiction.

When I was in law school, we did cover rape law in my criminal law class. The content that was most likely to be "triggering" was not the topic per se or even the cases, but the ignorant and insensitive comments about rape and consent made by some of the male students during class. Afterwards, I reminded one of them that, based on statistics, there was probably more than one rape survivor sitting in that class, listening to those comments. "Oh, I never thought of that," he said. I think that emphasizes the importance of covering this material, but covering it in a thoughtful way.
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