Dec 24, 2013
commented on Savage Love
On FAB and the subject of OKCupid vs. more specific fetish sites:
My boyfriend (also girlfriend, fuck yeah genderfluidity) and I have considered ourselves polyamorous in principle (though not in practice) for the 5 years we've been together, and in the past year I managed to let go of a lot of the hangups and insecurities I had about putting myself out there again and try dating other people.
My first thought was to go to Fetlife and post a personal as a BBW, thinking this was the best/only way to find an interested partner. Unfortunately that fizzled- there were some replies, but I wasn't particularly interested in any of them. I don't mind being fetishized, but the chemistry just wasn't there.
So I switched to OKCupid and have since been infinitely more successful. I'm dating a very sweet guy in addition to my boyfriend, and seeing a few others casually.
I think the reason I've had so much success is because I'm honest about my body type and about my interests. I have a recent full body photo in addition to face pics, my body type is listed as overweight (so that people who aren't interested can more easily filter me out), and I screen anyone I'm interested in by reading through their match questions for potential warning signs or triggers.. just like everyone else on OKCupid.
Don't be afraid to put yourself out there, FAB- just do so honestly and with as much confidence as you can muster. I'm not saying fetish sites can't work for you, but I am saying OKCupid CAN work for you.
Dec 24, 2013
joined My Stranger Face