scratchmaster joe
Capitol Hill
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I'll reserve judgment. I hope you will too.

scratchmaster joe

Location: Capitol Hill


I'll reserve judgment. I hope you will too.

More Than You Need to Know

    This or That

  • Punch Buggy or Slug Bug
  • Bring It On or Stomp the Yard
  • Cowgirls, Inc. or Pony
  • Dan Savage or Charles Mudede
  • Meridian or Film Forum
  • No legs and a million dollars or A million legs and no dollars
  • Vampire or Zombie
  • Dicks or Vaginas
  • Too many teeth or No teeth at all
  • Jesus or Santa (sexually)?
  • Honey Bucket or Wizards of Ooze
  • Elliott Bay or Amazon
  • Barsuk or Fantagraphics
  • Dina Martina or Jean Godden
  • Zune or Segway
  • SF or LA
  • Wildrose or Staying Home (Lesbians only)
  • Folklife or A kick in the face while drowning in fish guts
  • Production or Devel
  • Ivar Haglund or Jean Enerson
  • Tushy or Tuchus
  • Tom Skerritt or Dave Matthews
  • Questions

  • What song do you want played at your funeral?: I'd like all of my former GFs to perform a queef symphony. I already wrote the music, check my files under "Q"...
  • What song do you never want to hear again?: Anything folksy or blue grassy...
  • What do you like to read when you poop?: self-help books.
  • What keeps you up at night?: Anxiety.
  • What helps you sleep?: Ambien.
  • What song or movie makes you cry?: The one that invokes emotion.
  • Where's your hairiest square inch?: top o ma head
  • If you could bring one dead person back to life, who would it be?: Rocky (my golden retriever)
  • What book have you read the most?: The Long Hard Road Out of Hell
  • What movie can you recite verbatim?: The Little Mermaid
  • What piece of art would you steal?: I'd never steal.
  • What's your biggest grammatical pet peeve?: Steve
  • What is your sweetest taboo?: fist fighting in defense of a person being hurt by someone capable of violence.
  • For Trolls Only

  • What's worse: Gay marriage or black people being allowed to listen to R&B?: Blacks
  • Dan Savage started the Iraq war. Why?: Free Slurpee!!!
  • If you found out you were going to have a pit-bull baby, would you have an abortion?: Yes
  • Why are people so afraid to learn the truth about building 7?: Because it's scary.
  • Where do you buy your WOW Gold?: Phil
  • What's your favorite Charles Mudede post?: The sexist one with the boobs
  • Fill in the Blank

  • God is: everything.

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